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‘Fine.’ Jenna poured herself half a glass of wine. ‘The new senior reg started today.’
‘What’s he or she like?’
‘He’s nice. Robert asked me to look after him in the PAU today.’
Lucy smiled. ‘Because you, my dear sister, are brilliant at tucking new people under your wing.’
‘Because I had a good example to follow in the best primary school teacher ever,’ Jenna pointed out, and lifted her glass in a toast. ‘So how was your day?’
‘Fine. Ava spent the whole day chatting.’
Jenna grinned. ‘That’s because she takes after her aunt.’
‘Strictly speaking—’ Lucy began.
‘I’m her aunt,’ Jenna said firmly. ‘Lu, we’ve been through this enough times. In every way, Ava is your and Will’s daughter. All I did was lend you my womb for a few months—which I know you would have done for me if our situations had been the other way round.’
‘Of course I would.’ Lucy bit her lip. ‘Though the egg was yours, too.’
‘And, as we’re identical twins, that means our genes are the same, so my egg is exactly the same as yours would’ve been,’ Jenna reminded her. ‘As far as I’m concerned, Ava’s biologically yours, as well as legally and morally.’
Their friends and family—apart from one notable exception—had all been supportive about the surrogate pregnancy, but Jenna knew Lucy felt guilty about it. And usually Lucy’s doubts came to the surface when someone had upset her on the subject. ‘Has someone said something to you?’ she asked gently.
‘No—well, yes,’ Lucy admitted.
‘I hope you told them to walk a mile in your shoes and learn a few facts before they give you any more of their uninformed opinions.’
Lucy winced. ‘It’s my fault. The subject of surrogacy came up at toddler group. I should’ve just kept my mouth shut.’
‘You have nothing to be ashamed of. If anything, your story might actually help someone who’s struggling with the same issues you went through, and could see that there might just be a light for them, too, at the end of the tunnel.’ Jenna sighed. ‘But we seem to live in an age where everyone thinks their opinion is more valid than anyone else’s, and they don’t consider anyone else’s feelings before they open their mouths.’ Someone had clearly hectored her sister on the subject of surrogate babies. Jenna would’ve quite liked a serious chat with whoever had been so thoughtless, so she could put them very straight on the subject—and then shake them very hard until their teeth rattled.
‘I guess.’
Jenna frowned. ‘Lu, you know Ava’s yours.’ Had Lucy not been in a serious car crash which had ruptured her womb and damaged both her ovaries, five years ago, she wouldn’t have needed an emergency hysterectomy at the age of twenty-seven, putting an end to any hope of having her own children naturally.
‘I know.’
Jenna’s frown deepened. ‘Please tell me whoever it was didn’t say something as vile as Danny did.’
‘No-o.’
Which meant they had and Lucy didn’t want to admit it. Jenna put her glass on the worktop and hugged her twin. ‘Listen to me, you numpty. I love Will dearly, but purely as a brother. I don’t fancy him and I never have. He doesn’t fancy me, either. He’d drive me absolutely crackers if I had to live with him and all his vague professor stuff—just as I’d drive him crackers by bossing him around and organising him down to the last second instead of letting him get away with it, the way you do. And I love you more than anyone else in the world, Lu. I offered to be your surrogate because I was the one person who could actually make things right again after the adoption agency turned you and Will down. I hated seeing you with a broken heart and I desperately wanted to be able to help you. Just as you would’ve done, if it had been me in your shoes. And you already know all that, Lu, so I don’t know why I need to tell you again.’
Lucy swallowed hard. ‘I know.’
‘So please don’t listen to some over-opinionated, thoughtless woman who clearly doesn’t have a clue what it’s like to be in that situation or care how she makes other people feel.’
Lucy swallowed hard. ‘But I do feel guilty, Jen. If it wasn’t for me, you’d be married to Danny by now.’
‘And we’d probably be divorced,’ Jenna pointed out dryly. ‘Marrying him would’ve been a huge mistake.’
Lucy frowned. ‘Would it? Because I worry that you’re lonely.’
‘I don’t need a partner to have a fulfilling life,’ Jenna said firmly. She wasn’t going to admit to her twin in a million years that yes, sometimes she did feel lonely, when she woke at three in the morning and couldn’t sleep. ‘And I definitely don’t need a partner who’s going to issue ultimatums every time I suggest something that doesn’t fit in with his world view. Any man who asks me to choose between him and you is going to lose—every single time.’ She sang a snatch from the old song ‘Sisters’, just to emphasise the point, and hugged Lucy again. ‘Danny lacked compassion. If anything, you did me a favour, because his reaction to the surrogacy is what made me finally realise that he saw everything in terms of financial cost.’
‘But being our surrogate lost you your relationship.’
‘Which wouldn’t have worked in the long run, believe me. I don’t want to be with someone who puts a price on everything and can’t see any value if it can’t be counted in cash. That isn’t how I see things, and that kind of attitude makes me really unhappy. Marrying Danny would’ve been a disaster.’
‘With the IVF treatment and the pregnancy, it cost you a year out of your career,’ Lucy persisted.
‘Which I can make up.’
‘And it hit your earnings.’
That had been one of Danny’s biggest arguments, and Jenna had despised him for it. Some things were way, way more important than money. Like her sister’s happiness. Family. Love. ‘I really don’t care about the money, Lu. I had savings, and you and Will helped out with my rent. We managed just fine. It isn’t an issue.’
‘You’ve got an answer for everything, haven’t you?’ Lucy asked with a sigh.
‘Yup. So, oh, best sister in the world, try to stop worrying about it and let me go and take a peek at my gorgeous niece—and I promise not to wake her.’
‘I love you,’ Lucy said.
‘I love you, too,’ Jenna said with a smile.
She tiptoed upstairs and crept into the nursery; Ava was fast asleep in her cot, with her hands thrown back over her head, looking totally angelic. Although Jenna had given birth to the baby, she’d always considered Ava as being Lucy’s, not hers. And the love she felt for Ava wasn’t that of a mother: it was that of a doting aunt. Which was just how it should be, in her view.
‘Sleep tight, my beautiful niece,’ she whispered, and tiptoed out of the nursery.
* * *
Back down in the kitchen, Will had joined Lucy and greeted Jenna with a hug.
‘Perfect timing,’ Lucy said with a smile, and served up.
Jenna took one mouthful and sighed in bliss. ‘You really do make the best lasagne in the world.’
‘And at least I know you’re going to eat properly when you have dinner with us on Monday nights,’ Lucy said.
‘I do eat properly,’ Jenna protested.
‘Not when you’re really busy on the ward, you don’t. You grab a chocolate bar or a bowl of cereal.’
Jenna grinned. ‘You do exactly the same when you’re up to your eyes in baseline assessments in the first three weeks of the new school year and Will’s forgotten the time and that it was his turn to cook that night.’
‘I don’t forget the time,’ Will protested.
The sisters looked at him and laughed. ‘Oh, you do, honey,’ Lucy said, and leaned over to kiss him. ‘Half the time you live in the first century, not the twenty-first.’
‘It’s my job,’ Will said. ‘And I’ll join Lu in nagging you about eating properly, too, Jen.’
‘Oh, give me a break!’ But Jenna was laughing, knowing that her brother-in-law meant well. ‘Now the new senior reg has started, it should be a bit less frantic on the ward.’
‘So what’s the new doctor like?’ Will asked.
‘He’s good with kids. He has two packs of cards in his pockets as distractions—one with cars and one with puppies. It came in handy today when we had a toddler who slipped on the stairs and banged his head badly enough to need stitches,’ Jenna said.
‘Cars,’ Will said dryly, ‘shouldn’t be gender specific.’
‘Agreed, and Renzo isn’t sexist. He says that girls also like cars.’ Jenna smiled. ‘But that might be because he’s Italian and he loves fast cars and thinks everyone else does, too. He and little Billy—the lad who needed stitches—were practically drooling over this sports car.’
‘I’d be drooling over that, too. Except we wouldn’t be able to fit a baby seat in it,’ Will said.
‘Italian,’ Lucy said thoughtfully.
‘No, no and no,’ Jenna said, knowing exactly what was going through her twin’s mind. Tall, dark and gorgeous. Which pretty much summed up Lorenzo Conti. She definitely wasn’t going to tell Lucy that he was single, because she knew her sister would go straight into matchmaker mode. ‘But he did agree to help at the danceathon.’
‘That’s good. Though I still feel guilty about not being able to make it,’ Lucy said.
‘You have Will’s niece’s wedding in Edinburgh. And Will’s parents need some catch-up time with Ava,’ Jenna reminded her. ‘You both gave me a massive donation and a raffle prize, so you’ve more than done your bit.’
‘We wanted to help,’ Will said.
‘And you have. A lot,’ Jenna said. ‘So how’s your day been, Will?’
‘Full of deciphering illegible student handwriting—I swear it’s twice as bad on exam papers,’ Will said with a groan.
‘Ah, the joys of May,’ Jenna teased, laughing; she knew how much her brother-in-law loved his job and he adored his students—just as they adored him.
It was the perfect family evening, and Jenna was thoroughly relaxed by the time she got home. Though she couldn’t quite get Lorenzo Conti out of her head. He’d been very adamant about being single and not looking for a partner; it sounded to her as if someone had really hurt him. Or maybe he’d lost someone to illness or an accident and didn’t want to risk his heart again because the loss had hurt him too much. Not that it was any of her business. And she absolutely wasn’t interested in anything other than a professional relationship with her new colleague. After Danny, as far as she was concerned, love was completely off limits. She didn’t trust her judgement any more, not after she’d got it so badly wrong with him. She had a family she adored and a job that fulfilled her. She was lucky. Wanting to have the same kind of closeness with someone that Lucy had with Will, and a baby of her own—that would just be greedy.
* * *
Jenna’s first patient in clinic the next morning, eight-year-old Maddie Loveday, was a puzzle.
‘It started six weeks ago,’ Maddie’s mum said. ‘She’d been at football club and came home with really red cheeks. It looked a bit like windburn, but it seemed a bit odd because it’s not that cold and windy at the end of April. Then she went down with a really nasty virus. It hit the whole family and even I was in bed for three days with it.’
A rash and a virus. Two things that were really hard to narrow down, and half the time there wasn’t an effective treatment and you just had to wait it out. Jenna smiled and waited for Mrs Loveday to continue.
‘The rash didn’t go away and it spread down her arms and legs. She said her legs hurt, she had pains in her tummy, and it hurt to swallow.’ Mrs Loveday grimaced. ‘Then she was really down and a bit weepy—which just isn’t my Maddie. I took her to the doctor.’
‘What did your GP say?’ Jenna asked.
‘He thought it might be allergic eczema, but my youngest has eczema and I’m really careful with laundry detergent and conditioner. Maddie’s never had any kind of reaction to food, and that rash didn’t look like any eczema I’ve ever seen.’ Mrs Loveday sighed. ‘I think he referred Maddie here just to shut me up.’
Seeing that she was close to tears, Jenna put a reassuring hand on her arm. ‘Mrs Loveday, when our mums tell us that their kids aren’t right, we listen. You’re the experts on your kids, so you know when there’s something wrong. It’s our job to listen and help you.’
‘Thank you.’ Mrs Loveday swallowed hard. ‘I know you can’t believe everything you read on the Internet, but I wondered if the rash was some kind of autoimmune thing.’
‘That’s a possibility,’ Jenna said. ‘Rashes have lots of different causes and they can be really tricky to diagnose. And you’re absolutely right not to believe everything you read on the Internet, because there are a lot of scaremongering stories out there.’ She turned to the little girl. ‘Maddie, is it OK if I examine you?’
Maddie nodded.
Jenna looked at the rash. Coupled with the pain in Maddie’s legs and tummy, and her difficulty in swallowing, the rash could well be a sign of an autoimmune problem, but Jenna wasn’t sure quite which one. ‘I’ve not seen a rash like this before,’ she said. ‘I think you’re right, Mrs Loveday, and it’s very likely an autoimmune disease. Do you mind if I have a quick discussion with one of my more senior colleagues?’
‘As long as you can find out what’s wrong with Maddie and make her better, then do whatever you need to,’ Mrs Loveday said.
Jenna headed for the offices. None of the consultants was around, but Lorenzo was in his office. Given that he was her senior and had three or four years’ more experience than she did, there was a chance that he’d seen a condition like Maddie’s before. She rapped on his office door. ‘Renzo, have you got a minute, please?’
‘Sure,’ he said.
‘How are you on autoimmune diseases?’
‘I’ve treated a few in my time,’ he said. ‘What are you looking at?’
‘I’m not entirely sure.’ She filled him in on Maddie Loveday’s medical history and symptoms. ‘I can see you’re busy, so I’m sorry to ask, but I’m a bit stuck. I don’t suppose I could borrow you to come and have a look at her, could I?’
‘Sure,’ he said, to her relief, and saved the file he was working on.
After Jenna had introduced him to the Lovedays, Lorenzo examined Maddie’s skin. ‘Mrs Loveday, has anyone talked to you about juvenile dermatomyositis or JDM?’ he asked.
Mrs Loveday looked surprised. ‘No. The GP just sent me here.’
‘It’s pretty rare, with about three in a million children being affected, and girls are twice as likely as boys to have it,’ Lorenzo said. ‘Basically “dermatomyositis” means inflammation of the skin and muscles, and from what Jenna’s already told me and what I can see here, it looks to me as if that’s what’s happening to Maddie.’
‘What causes it?’ Mrs Loveday asked.
‘We don’t actually know,’ Lorenzo said. ‘Jenna told me about Maddie’s virus, and in the cases we know of there was a virus involved.’
‘So how long does it last? Will it ever go away? Is she going to get worse?’ Mrs Loveday asked.
‘Sometimes a child has one episode of JDM that lasts for a couple of years and then goes away for ever; sometimes it comes back again after a few years of remission; and sometimes it doesn’t go away at all and needs managing for the rest of the child’s life,’ Lorenzo said. ‘I’m sorry to be so vague, but the way the condition develops really varies. What I can promise is that we’ll sort out some treatment so Maddie can live her life just as if she hasn’t got JDM.’
‘So what does this JDM do?’ Mrs Loveday asked.
‘It makes the muscles weaker and causes pain, so that’s why Maddie’s talked about her legs hurting and having tummy pains,’ Lorenzo said. ‘The inflammation tends to affect the large muscles around the hips and shoulders, so that means it’s harder for Maddie to walk, climb the stairs, get up from the floor or lift her arms. And it’ll make you tired, Maddie.’
The little girl nodded. ‘Since I got the rash and tummy pains, I can’t run as fast when I play football, and I’m really tired by the end of the match.’
‘So how do you treat it?’ Mrs Loveday asked.
‘Medication and physiotherapy. I’d like to admit her to the ward for now,’ Lorenzo said. ‘Maddie might need to stay for a couple of weeks so we can get her condition under control—we can give her some medication to help, but there will be other treatments as well. We’ll start with steroids at first and that’ll really help with her muscles and her skin.’
Mrs Loveday looked shocked. ‘Steroids? Isn’t that the stuff bodybuilders use?’
‘No, these are corticosteroids,’ Jenna explained. ‘They’re naturally produced by the body, too, and we use them to bring down inflammation—that will stop Maddie’s muscles hurting and it will also sort out the rash.’
‘We’ll also need to do some tests, including an EMG,’ Lorenzo said. ‘That’s a special scan which shows us the electrical activities in your muscles—and I promise it doesn’t hurt, Maddie.’
