Professor And The Nanny

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She liked the sound of that. “Maybe they were.” Her voice was little more than a whisper. Should she come right out and say what she was thinking? All her girlfriends let the guys know when they were willing to sleep with them. The women claimed the fellows liked having them take the initiative. It made men feel macho, pumped up their ego and started the testosterone flowing.

Her more-experienced women friends teased her about her reluctance to have sex with a man as opposed to making love with one. To make love you had to be in love, and Ethan was the only one she’d ever felt that strongly about.

Well, nothing ventured nothing gained, as her grandpa always used to say. She cleared her throat. “I…I guess we could always find out. That is…”

She felt him tense and knew she’d made a mistake. She was being much too forward. She’d been propositioned many times, but she’d never come on to a man before.

Ethan didn’t seem pleased, even though it was all too evident that he wanted her.

She stirred and raised her head to look at him. His face was expressionless and the hot swell of humiliation surged through her. “I…I’m sorry,” she said, and tried to stand up, but he grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her back down. “You must think I’m a real…a real…”

“That’s enough,” he said angrily as he refused to let her loose. Don’t you ever let me hear you call yourself disrespectful names.”

“I only wanted to let you know…” Her voice broke and she couldn’t go on.

“I know what you wanted to let me know, honey,” he told her softly, “and I didn’t answer you right away because I was fighting off an overpowering urge to sweep you into my arms and carry you upstairs to bed.”

He hugged her close. “On the other hand, I’ve got to warn you, don’t ever come on to a man unless you’re prepared to carry through.”

She sighed and relaxed again in his arms. “I was prepared to carry through, but telling you was a mistake I’ve never made before and will never make again. You didn’t like it, I could tell.”

“I loved it,” he told her, “but I don’t think you realized how difficult it is for me not to take you up on your offer. A lot of men would simply have taken advantage of your innocence and then blamed you for ‘leading them on’ when the experience was unsatisfactory for you.”

He tipped her face up and rubbed her nose with his own. “Some day you’ll thank me for not taking your virginity. Save that precious first time for the man you truly love.”

She pressed her cheek against his. His five-o’clock beard was bristly but endearing. “Why are you so sure you’re not that man?”

He paused as if gathering his thoughts, then answered. “Because I’m all wrong for you. You’ve only recently lost your parents and you’re alone and vulnerable. You’re looking for a father figure, and who better than me? Although, I’m a little young for that role.”

She drew in a breath to protest but he hurried on. “Factor in Nate as a perfect grandfather model and Danny, whom you could grow to love like a son, and you’ve got a family again. What you feel for me is security, possible infatuation, but you need a young man you can grow up with, not a middle-aged one who comes from a different generation.”

Brittany turned and put her palm flat on his shoulder, then pushed herself away from him. “That is the most ridiculous thing I ever heard,” she said angrily. “I suggest you’re the one who needs to grow up. I think you’re afraid of me.”

“Damn right I am!” he admitted even as he gathered her back in his arms. “I’d be a fool not to be. Try to understand, honey. I’m a college professor and you’ve been a student at the university where I teach. You’ll probably return there to finish your education sometime soon, which would make a romantic relationship between us pretty dicey. But that’s not the biggest problem. I’ll be thirty-six years old in a few months, I was married for eight years and have an eighteen-month-old child who needs constant supervision. I also have a dependent father. Don’t you see? You don’t want my problems. You need a new, young family of your own.”

She sighed and snuggled deeper into his embrace. This was getting them nowhere. “I don’t want to argue anymore, let’s change the subject. What are you going to do about Danny tomorrow?”

Ah, yes, Danny, Ethan thought. He’d been so busy trying to explain to Brittany why he didn’t want her, when they both knew he did, that he hadn’t had time to make any plans for coping with the upheaval having his baby son full-time would cause in his life.

“I don’t know,” he admitted. “I’ll need to take the day off and try to find either a baby-sitter or a child-care center that has room for him. There’s one at the university but I understand it’s always filled to capacity. I’ll have to have someone by Monday because that’s when we start preparing for finals at school and I have to be there.”

A solution occurred to Brittany. “Why don’t you let me take care of him tomorrow? I’ll be here anyway, and that will free you up to spend your time looking for a permanent situation for Danny.”

“But you’ve got a full-time job taking care of Nate,” Ethan reminded her.

She raised her head and looked at him. “Nate’s no bother. Mainly all I have to do is make sure he gets his meds on time and eats regularly. That will leave me plenty of time to look after Danny. As long as they don’t get out of the house or the fenced-in backyard it should be a breeze.”

Ethan smiled sadly. Ah, the innocence of the young! “Obviously you’ve never been around children much. Especially ones Danny’s age. They can be adorable little brats and usually are. You got a taste of it this afternoon, but you’d have a whole day of chasing after him all by yourself tomorrow.

Brittany was getting tired of being treated as if she were dim-witted. She moved out of his embrace and sat up. “Look, if you don’t trust me with your child just say so. I’m willing to help you out if you need it, but I’m not going to beg.”

She stood and went to the closet where she kept her purse. “I’m going home and do some laundry before I go to bed. You make up your mind what you want to do and let me know in the morning.”

She picked up her purse and was almost to the door when she heard Ethan call her name. It would have given her a great deal of satisfaction to stomp out and slam the door behind her, but that would only prove she was as immature as he thought she was.

Instead she stopped but didn’t turn to look at him.

“I would be very grateful if you would take care of Danny as well as Nate tomorrow.” His voice was husky. “Thank you for offering. It will be an immense help.”

Although she had her back to him, she could hear his footsteps on the tile floor as he approached her. He stopped right behind her, took her shoulders in his hands and turned her to face him.

“Now, do I get a good-night kiss?” he asked hopefully.

Without a word she put her arms around his neck and their lips melded.

During the long weekend Ethan learned, much to his distress, that finding child care in Lexington, Kentucky, was impossible. The care centers, both public and private, were filled and had long waiting lists. Mothers who stayed at home and took care of their own children weren’t interested in taking in the kids of strangers, too. Students with summer holidays coming up were, in his judgment, either too immature to be trusted with such a young child or preferred to play around for the next three months before going off to college in the fall.

Surely somewhere in this city of more than 200,000 people there was one who fit his admittedly high standards as a nanny.

That thought sounded dumb even to him. Of course there was such a person and he’d known who it was since before he’d started this search. Brittany could satisfy all his needs. The perfect nanny for Danny, nurse for Nate, and lover for him.

A shiver ran down his spine. What more could he want? He was almost certain she’d agree to be nanny and nurse. Being his lover might take a little persuasion, but she’d already told him she’d like to make love with him, so why did he hesitate?

Because he wasn’t that kind of man, dammit! He couldn’t take advantage of a young girl’s naiveté, and she was a girl no matter how much she protested that she was all grown-up. He might burn for her but that was his problem. It was up to him to protect her, even from himself if necessary, and he couldn’t do that if she was living right here in the same house with him.

My God, he wasn’t a saint!

Brittany’s phone rang late on Sunday evening. It was Ethan. She hadn’t heard from him since she left his house to come home Friday night, but she’d been thinking of him all weekend.

He sounded tired and discouraged. “Brittany, I have a big favor to ask of you. Is your offer to take care of Danny on a temporary basis still open?”

So he hadn’t had any luck finding child care yet. “Of course it is, Ethan,” she hurriedly assured him. “Nate and I are going to take a picnic lunch and go to the park tomorrow. We’ll find one that has a children’s playground. Danny will love that.”