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Carlee wrote a check and tried not to think about using most of the money she had left in the bank. The rest would barely cover the bank’s service charge, and payday was not for another week.
Hurrying back to the ER, she took up her vigil once more. Finally a man wearing green scrubs, paper slippers over his shoes and a stethoscope looped around his neck came out of the trauma room. “I’m Dr. Vance. Your son is going to be fine.”
Carlee bolted to her feet and burst into tears of relief. “Oh, thank God. Thank God…”
“He has croup, but we’ve got it under control. His heart rate is down to 120 and respiration to forty-eight. Those are good vital signs. He’s also awake and alert and taking a bottle without wheezing.”
“Croup.” She mouthed the word. It was familiar, but she could not recall what it meant.
“It’s a viral infection of the upper and lower breathing tract. It can come on suddenly, without warning, most often at night, and sometimes it’s triggered by exposure to cold air.”
Carlee blanched. Cold air. It had been damp and cold at the cemetery. She had not wanted to take him, but wanted to be able to tell him one day that he had gone to his mother’s funeral. “It’s my fault,” she whispered, overcome with guilt. “I had him outside today. I shouldn’t have.”
Dr. Vance was quick to assure her, “Now, now. I said triggered, not caused. He already had the virus, only you didn’t know it. There was no way you could have. So don’t blame yourself. I deal with croup several times a night. It’s one of the few diseases I can think of that can give the impression a child is going to die. Unfortunately some do, but you acted quickly and did the right thing in calling an ambulance, and now the danger is over. We’re going to admit him overnight for observation, though, and keep giving him humidified oxygen and epinephrine every four hours as needed. By morning, I expect all the symptoms to be completely gone. We’ll send him home with a prescription for prednisone and keep him on that for the next four days.
“You’ll have a copy of his records,” he continued, “so you can take them to his regular pediatrician. He’s going to need a follow-up in about a week to make sure he’s doing okay. I suggest you keep him inside, in bed if you can, till he’s completely over this. Being weak, he doesn’t need to be exposed to other children who might have another kind of infection. Just keep a close eye on him.”
“I’ll watch him every minute, believe me,” she promised.
The door to the trauma room opened, and a nurse came out pushing Scotty in a rolling cradle. Carlee thanked the doctor and fell into step beside the nurse.
The woman smiled. “He’s so cute. And such a good baby, too. You can stay with him in the pediatric unit if you like. They have recliners for parents.”
Carlee wasn’t about to leave Scotty’s side. They’d have to drag her out of the hospital if they tried to make her. And she didn’t care about recliners. She would stand on her feet all night if necessary. She didn’t want to take her eyes off him for one second.
The nurses in the pediatric unit were just as kind as the ones in the ER. They brought her a pillow and a blanket and said she should let them know if there was anything they could do to make her more comfortable.
Scotty was sleeping soundly, his breathing even and normal. Carlee watched his little chest rise and fall, and gave thanks that the worst was over. Tomorrow she would buy a book on child care and read it cover to cover so she’d be able to recognize illnesses.
Tomorrow.
She shuddered to think once again of the problems she faced.
Tomorrow she would lose her job, because there was no way she was going to leave Scotty with a sitter until he was completely well. And if she had to drop out of school, a new course wouldn’t start until after it was time for her to report for work at the grove gift shop. There would be no promotion and no raise this year.
She was also going to have to tell the apartment-complex manager that since she had no job, she had no idea when the rent would be paid.
And what about the hospital bill and Scotty’s medicine?
Leaning her head on the crib railing, she had never felt so alone or desperate in her life. There just didn’t seem to be any solution. Asking for welfare or food stamps was out of the question, because she was afraid when it was discovered she was not yet Scotty’s legal guardian, the authorities would take him away from her because of her inability to support him. He would be placed with strangers, and Carlee could almost hear Alicia crying in her grave if that happened.
Carlee was glad Scotty was in a semiprivate room. She did not want to be around anyone else. But then another baby was brought in, a little girl about Scotty’s age, also recuperating from a croup attack. The parents looked as though they had been through the same traumatic experience as she had, weary and worn from the experience.
A nurse pulled the privacy curtain, but Carlee could hear the conversation between the couple.
“I’ll stay with him, honey,” the father was saying. “You go home and get some rest. Then you can come back and pick us up in the morning.”
“Are you sure?” the mother responded, sounding doubtful. “You’ve got to work tomorrow.”
“I can manage. I want you to feel up to taking care of Cindy and not be sleepy. So you run along.”
“But tomorrow night you start that second job at the gas station.”
“And I’ll take a third job if that’s what it takes to support you two. Now go home and go to bed, honey.”
Silence. Carlee knew they were kissing. Then they said their good-nights, and the mother left.
There was a good father, Carlee thought wistfully. The kind she wished she’d had growing up. Who could say that Scotty’s father wouldn’t be like that if he knew he had a son?
If Alicia had told him she was pregnant, things might have been different. He might have agreed to help Alicia financially had he known about Scotty.
So maybe it was time he found out.
Carlee had reached the end of her rope and had nothing to lose by letting him know he had a son.
But first she had to find him.
Chapter Two
Carlee had never been to the Blue Moon Lounge but quickly recognized the decor Alicia had described—potted palms, ficus trees, hanging baskets of ferns and philodendron, and brilliant-colored tropical birds squawking in bamboo cages. Water trickled down a rock wall into a rock-bordered pool swimming with goldfish, and floor-to-ceiling windows offered a spectacular view of the azure sea beyond. Alicia had enjoyed working there, and had made good tips.
Carlee figured the late afternoon was a good time for her to drop by. She intended to be finished before the “happy hour” crowd arrived.
A man wearing khaki slacks and a bright floral shirt greeted her. “May I help you? I’m afraid the bar isn’t open yet.” He gave Scotty a questioning glance. “I hope you aren’t planning on bringing him to Happy Hour.”
“Oh, heavens, no! I was a close friend of Alicia Malden. This is her son, Scotty. I assume you knew her?”
“I sure did,” he said, his tone instantly compassionate. “I’m Jim Martin, the manager. We all thought so much of her, and I want you to know how sorry we are. I wanted to make it to the funeral, but there was something else I couldn’t get out of. I pitched in on the flowers, though, and I know that some of the girls here went.”
“They did, and the flowers were beautiful. Tell me, how long did you know Alicia?” Carlee asked.
“I’ve only been the manager for seven months, so I knew her for that long. I thought she was nice, very hardworking.” He looked puzzled. “Is there something you need from me?”
“No, because you didn’t know her very long, you won’t have the information I’m after. Is Marcy Jemison around?”
He motioned to glass doors opening out to a deck overlooking the beach. “She’s outside taking a breather with some of the other girls before the rush starts.”
She thanked him and made her way out to where Marcy was propped on a railing with two other young women, all dressed in the familiar white shorts and blue blouse that Carlee remembered Alicia wearing.
Marcy squealed with recognition and held out her arms to Scotty. This time, he went to her with a big grin.
“This is Alicia’s baby,” she announced to the others, whirling him around and hugging him. “Isn’t he adorable?” Then to Carlee, “What brings you to the beach?”
Soberly, Carlee replied, “Our conversation at the cemetery.”
Marcy’s eyes went wide. “Oh, wow. That’s great. So you’re really going to nail the guy. Good for you.”
Carlee hadn’t thought of it in quite that way. All she wanted was to ask Scotty’s father to accept his responsibilities. If he refused to believe Scotty was his, then it would be a different story. She wasn’t going to let another man mess with her life if she could help it. Besides, Scotty deserved the support of his father.
She turned to the other two women, who were obviously taking everything in. “Did either of you know the man Alicia was seeing?”
One shook her head and the other explained, “We’ve only been here a month and didn’t know her very well, but we went to her funeral because we liked her.”
“It was so sad,” her friend added. “But we talked about it later, how tired she seemed all the time. She would sit down every chance she got, and I thought she was breathing heavy a couple of times.”
If only Carlee had insisted Alicia see a doctor. Woulda-Coulda-Shoulda, as the taunting saying went. It was too late for regrets now.
Carlee felt her frustration growing. “Well, is there anybody working now who was here when Alicia was seeing her mystery man?”
“Bonnie Handel was,” one of the girls on the railing said with a snap of her fingers. “I heard her say she’s been here since the place opened four years ago. Others come and go, but not Bonnie.”
“Why should she leave?” the other said with a snicker. “She’s the hostess and the cashier and gets to sit on a stool behind the counter all night. She doesn’t work her fanny off like we do.”
Carlee, feeling a wave of excitement, cried, “Where can I find her?”
“Try looking over your shoulder,” Marcy said, handing Scotty back to her.
Carlee guessed Bonnie to be in her mid-fifties. She was attractive with silver-tinted hair and ice-blue eyes framed by shimmering turquoise shadow. The black satin blouse she was wearing with tight white slacks revealed the care she had taken of her figure through the years.
Carlee quickly introduced herself and explained why she had come.
“We can talk in the office.” Bonnie led the way, and once they were inside, closed the door, leaned against the desk and flashed a big grin. “I want you to know I’m glad you’re going to try and track him down. The creep deserves to have to pay through the nose for walking out on that poor girl. If it’d been me, he’d have never gotten away with it, and I told her that.”
Carlee soberly agreed. “I know. I tried, too.”
“She fell for him like a ton of bricks, and I can’t blame her, because he was nice-looking. A real hunk. She lit up like a launch from the Cape the first night he came in. He was in her station, all by himself, and she hovered over him like you wouldn’t believe. He started coming in every night, and I’d see them leave together and knew things were getting hot.
“She’d talk to me about him a little from time to time,” Bonnie continued. “I’m older than the others are, and I’ve always been a good listener, so they come to me with their troubles sometimes. Alicia said he was married, but he was trying to get a divorce—only his wife was giving him a hard time. I told her I’d never known a married man yet who was fooling around that didn’t say the exact same thing. But she said she believed he really cared about her, and even when he quit coming around, she held out hope he’d come back.”
Scotty was getting heavy and starting to fret. Carlee sat down in a chair and poked his pacifier into his mouth. “How long were they together? Do you remember?”
Bonnie pursed her lips in thought, then said, “Oh, it was only a few weeks. She really fell hard and fast. It was something, all right. She totally flipped for the guy.”
“And then he just disappeared,” Carlee said, more to herself than Bonnie. “Maybe she was right in figuring he went back to his wife. She said she wasn’t going to chase after him, that if he really loved her, he’d come back to her on his own.”
“Oh, yeah, right.” Bonnie rolled her eyes. “And he swore he did, too. She told me that. He said it was love at first sight, that he’d never felt like that about a woman before. He had a line, all right.”
“Did she ever tell you his name?” Carlee probed hopefully. “She’d refer to him only as Nick, and once I asked her for his last name, but she wouldn’t say.”
“Well, she said that from the very beginning he made her promise to keep everything between them hush-hush, because if his wife found out, she’d make it that much harder for him to get the divorce. How come you’re looking for him? To get him to take the baby?”
Carlee was taken aback. “No, no, of course not. I love Scotty and plan to raise him myself.”
“Were you related to Alicia?”
“We were best friends, but she wanted me to have him. She signed a paper naming me guardian right before she died, and…” Carlee trailed off, embarrassed to share so much information. All she wanted was the name of Scotty’s father and where to locate him. She didn’t want to confide anything.
Bonnie gave a disgusted snort. “He wouldn’t want him, anyhow. But since that’s not what you’re after, then it can only be money. Good luck there, because after he abandoned her like he did, I can’t see him paying child support unless you want to take him to court. That means paternity testing, hiring a lawyer to go after him. You’re talking big bucks.”
Carlee hoped it wouldn’t come to that. “I just want to find him and give him a chance to do what’s right. After all, he doesn’t even know he has a child and—”
“What’s that you say?” Bonnie stared at her incredulously, hands on her hips. “I don’t think I heard you right.”
Uneasily, Carlee repeated herself.
“Honey, is that what Alicia told you—that he didn’t know she was pregnant?”
With a chill of foreboding, Carlee hugged Scotty a little closer. “She said she never got a chance to tell him, because all of a sudden he just stopped coming around. And like I told you, she wanted him to come back because he loved her, not because he felt obligated, so she didn’t go looking for him.”
Bonnie swung her head from side to side, laughing softly, sadly, then said, “Boy, if pride could be bottled and swallowed, Alicia would have stayed drunk on hers. She was just too ashamed to tell you the truth—she did tell him she was going to have his baby, but he told her to get an abortion. They had a fight over it, right out there on that deck one night after we closed. I know, because I heard every word. It was real smoky in here that night, and I wasn’t feeling good and went out to get some fresh air before checking out the register. They didn’t see me in the shadows.”
Carlee felt sick. “I…I don’t believe it.”
“Believe it, honey, ’cause it’s true. He told her to get an abortion, and she told him to go to hell. And that’s the last anybody ever saw of him around here.”
Now she knew why Alicia had not wanted to talk about asking him for help. He’d been, in her mind, as shiftless and irresponsible as her father. And when he’d so cruelly and callously told her to have an abortion, it had been just as humiliating as when her father’s lover had thrown money in her mother’s face.
It all made sense now, and she was even more determined to find this guy and make him do right by Scotty. She said as much to Bonnie.
The woman nodded with understanding and allowed that she didn’t blame her one bit. “The no-good creep should have to pay through the nose. I hope you do find him.”
“Yeah, right,” Carlee said bitterly as she stood and prepared to leave. “I don’t even know his name.”
“Well, I do.”
She had already turned but whipped about to stare in wonder. “I thought Carlee never told you.”
Bonnie smiled. “She didn’t. But that doesn’t mean I didn’t know it. He was paying his bar tab one night and dropped his wallet. Everything fell out of it. I bent down to help him pick it all up and happened to get a look at his driver’s license. His name is Nick Starke.”
Carlee felt like shouting with joy. “And did you see his address—where he lives?”
“Just the town. He snatched it out of my hand like he didn’t want me to see it. I thought that was funny at the time, but figured maybe he was afraid I’d find out who he was and call his wife and tell her about him cattin’ around with Alicia.”
“So what town? Where?” Carlee was shaking.
“I have no idea where it is, but I remember the name because it’s so weird for Florida—Snow Hill.”
“Snow Hill, Florida. Nick Starke.” Carlee rolled the words around in her suddenly dry mouth. “Starke…” she whispered. “Starke…Groves…”
“What’s that?” Bonnie asked.
But Carlee was halfway out the door. “Thank you so much, Bonnie. You’ve been a great help.”
Carlee’s head was spinning she was so excited. One day at the gift shop, her boss had been talking about all the big orange growers in the state, and now she recalled him saying that Starke Groves was one of the largest and most profitable.
He’d also said it was located in the oddly named town of Snow Hill, Florida. And if Nick Starke had anything to do with Starke Groves, he could well afford to help support his child.
The parking lot was filling up quickly as people getting off work arrived to unwind at Happy Hour. As soon as Carlee backed out of her spot, someone pulled in. Scotty let out a howl, and she realized she’d dropped his pacifier somewhere.
