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“At their leisure. They can stay in the city for a few more days if they wish. I’ll continue to pay their expenses for as long they remain here. An extended holiday doesn’t seem too unreasonable.”
“Ah, so you’ll ask Victoria out but I have to break it off with the other two?”
“As I said earlier, it’s just a job interview. And only one candidate can get hired, so to speak.”
“Right.” She leaned back in the chair and flexed her fingers, curling them into fists and letting her manicured nails dig into her palms.
There was no reason at all the thought of Stavros going on a date with Victoria should make her feel like she might be sick.
But it did. She couldn’t deny that it did.
She was seriously losing it.
“Well, if I don’t see you again before your date … break a leg.”
He smiled, but his eyes held a strange, unreadable expression. “I’ll see you. After at least.”
No. “See you then.”
CHAPTER SEVEN (#ulink_763479b1-32a7-5656-b66b-c37053793772)
THERE was nothing wrong with Victoria. She was beautiful, she was pleasant. Smart. She would make a wonderful queen. Over dinner she’d talked at great length concerning how passionate she was about charities, starting foundations and visiting hospitals.
She possessed all the qualities he required for a bride.
Yet as he thought of binding himself to her, he felt nothing. No matter how hard he tried. He felt like he was being suffocated. As if the weight of the crown would physically crush him.
Don’t think of marriage. Think of sex.
If he could find a connection with her on that level, then maybe nothing else would matter. If he could flirt and put them both at ease, put a wall between them, maybe the tightness in his throat would abate.
When the limo stopped in front of the hotel she looked at him from beneath her lashes, her open, friendly expression changing. Seduction, he decided, was her intent. Good. He knew the game. Often, he relished the game.
So, why didn’t he feel anything? Nothing. Not even the slightest twinge of interest in his stomach. When she cocked her head to the side and licked her lips, there was no answering tug in his groin. Indeed, there was no signal coming from south of his belt at all. It was as though that member of his body hadn’t registered her existence.
He was a man, a man with a healthy appetite for sex. And she was, on paper, a sexually attractive woman. What he should be doing was pressing her back against the soft leather seat and claiming her soft pink lips.
His body rejected the idea while his mind replaced the image of a rosy pink mouth with one painted in temptation red. And with that image came a tightness in his chest, his heart pounding harder, his mind suddenly filled with Jessica.
“I had a nice time at dinner,” he said.
“So did I,” she said, cocking her head to the side even farther. Why was it that some women thought affecting the mannerisms of a cocker spaniel was sexy?
Except, usually, he would find this sexy. He just didn’t now. No use pretending he didn’t know why.
“Good night,” he said, opening the door to the limo and stepping out into the cool night. He held the door for her, giving as strong of a hint as he could.
She frowned and slid out, her body on the opposite side of the door to his. “I had a … a really nice time.” Her blue eyes were locked with his, her intentions obvious.
“So you said.”
“I appreciate you taking me out.”
“We’ll go out again. When I’m through with my business here.” Where was the flirtation? Why couldn’t he even pretend that he was interested? Whatever he felt for Jessica, it shouldn’t have the power to reach him here and now. It shouldn’t be able to control his thoughts and actions. That was the sort of thing he’d spent most of his adult life fighting.
“Oh … okay.” She smiled. “That’s good, right?”
It should have been. But he didn’t have any sort of positive feeling about it. “You’re a … nice woman, Victoria.”
Nice? Where the hell had his seduction skills gone?
“Thank you. You’re a nice man, Stavros.” She cleared her throat. “Good night, then?”
“Good night,” he said.
She stepped out of the way of the door and he closed it firmly. He would walk her into the hotel, as was the appropriate thing to do, but that was all.
She looked at him one more time in the lobby of the hotel, requesting a kiss, and when he took a step back he could have sworn he saw a fleeting hint of relief in her eyes.
“Hopefully we’ll see each other again soon,” she said.
“Hopefully,” he said, turning and leaving her in the lobby.
He felt no such hope. He would see her again though. Just because something in him was off at the moment didn’t mean she wasn’t the right candidate for the job. For the marriage.
He grimaced, lifted his hand to loosen his tie, which suddenly felt like a hangman’s noose.
Victoria was a sound choice.
He gritted his teeth. Yes, she was a sound choice. It didn’t matter that he desired someone else. Desire, no matter how strong, did not have a say in the future of his country. Desire could not shake his resolve.
He closed his eyes for a moment, clenched his hands into fists to disguise the unsteadiness in his fingers. It was only lust. Nothing special. Nothing important. A picture of Jessica flashed through his mind and there was an answering kick in his gut.
In spite of his intentions, desire seemed to be shaking him from the inside out. And what he really didn’t want to believe was that a whole lot more than desire was making him tremble.
Jessica wrapped her arms around herself and turned away from the view of the ocean, leaning against the rail of the terrace, the salted breeze blowing at her back, tangling in her hair. She wondered what Stavros was doing. If his date with Victoria has been successful.
Part of her hoped that it had been. He could marry her and they could have gorgeous, royal babies that could inherit the throne of Kyonos. They could be all sexy and royal together and she could go back to her empty house and contemplate the merit of getting a cat.
Yes, that was a good plan. A solid plan. She could name her cat Mittens.
“And how was your evening?”
She turned and her breath caught in her throat, forcing a sharp, gasping sound. Stavros was in the doorway, his black tie draped over his shoulder, the first three buttons of his shirt undone, the sleeves pushed up to his elbows.
He looked like he’d been undressed. She tried to smile while her stomach sank slowly into her toes, jealousy an acrid thing that ate at her insides, working its way out.
“I think that’s my line,” she said. Her words scraped over her dry throat.
“Lovely. Not nearly as lovely as you are. But lovely.” A smile curved his lips and he stepped fully onto the deck, closing some of the distance between them.
There was something strange about his manner. Something too slack. Too easy. “Have you been drinking?”
“Not even a little. But you do make me feel a bit lightheaded.”
“Seriously. What the heck, Stavros?”
“Careful, agápe, you’ll make me think I’ve lost my touch.”
“What did I tell you about not flirting with me?” Rather than the sort of shaky, sexy unease she usually felt when he flirted with her, she only felt anger. He had no right to do this to her. No right at all. He had been on a date with another woman. A date that, ideally, would be the beginning of a ‘til-death sort of relationship.
“You told me not to.” He stepped closer to her, his movements lithe. Graceful. Like a panther. “But I find I can’t help myself.”
“Then get some help from an outside source,” she growled, tightening her arms around herself.
“You are upset with me?” he asked, a boyish, teasing glint in his eye.
“Yes, I am upset with you. I don’t understand you. You kiss me, you act mad about it, you apologize, you go on a date with another woman and now you’re flirting.”
“Victoria was fine.”
“Fine?”
“Adequate. I should like to see her again.”
“What? That’s all?”
“I would like to marry her,” he said between clenched teeth.
“And you came out here flirting with me?”
He shrugged. “I told you why I’m doing this. It has nothing to do with personal feelings or excitement on my part and everything to do with getting things in order for Kyonos.”
“Great,” she said, annoyance deserting her, replaced by a sadness she had no business feeling.
“I prefer it when you smile,” he said, injecting a playful note to his voice.
“I don’t feel like smiling.” She turned away from him, her focus pinned decidedly onto the scenery.
“Why do you do this?”
“Why do I do what?” she asked, not looking at him as she responded.
“Why do you make it impossible for me to reach you?”
“Why are you trying?”
“Because I can’t take a breath without thinking of you,” he said, his voice suddenly real. Raw.
“I don’t …”
“Jessica,” he said, regaining some of his composure, “you know my situation. My obligations. But that doesn’t mean we can’t see where our attraction takes us.”
“Yes, Stavros, yes, it does mean that,” she said, panic fluttering in her chest. Panic and a desperate desire to believe the words he’d just spoken.
His dark brows locked together. “That kiss … it haunts me. It’s eating at me. I need …” He sucked in a sharp breath. “I need you. Tell me you need me, too.”
“I …” She shook her head. “It doesn’t matter if I do.”
His expression shifted, a veil dropping, revealing unguarded hunger. Stark and nearly painful to witness. “Let’s pretend that it does.” The desperation in his tone, the raw need, was beyond her. And yet it called to her, echoed inside of her. “Let’s pretend, like we did the other night, that none of the other stuff exists. That I am just a man. And you are just a woman. A woman I desire above all else.”
She sucked in a breath that tore at her lungs, leaving her raw and bleeding inside, and tried to keep the tears from falling. How could he tempt her like this? “Stavros … that’s the problem, all of that, that stuff we tried to ignore? It is real. And we can’t pretend it’s not. It won’t change anything.”
“Tonight it doesn’t have to be real,” he said, his voice dark, tortured.
“I am not your best bet for a last-minute, commitment-phobic fling,” she admonished. “I am the last woman you should want for that.”
“Why? The attraction between us is real. And you said yourself, it isn’t as though you’re a virgin. You’re an experienced woman who knows what she wants.”
There was no ease now. No flirtation. And he was harder to resist now because of it. Because this was real. What she’d witnessed when he’d first come out onto the terrace, that had been the fake. This was her evidence that he really did want her.
It was unfair. It was too much.
Anger, unreasonable and not entirely directed at Stavros, spilled over. “I’m pointless, don’t you know? Can’t you tell? I can’t have a baby. I am a testosterone killer. I make a man feel like he isn’t really a man. I can’t be pleased sexually. Don’t I know what that does to a man?” She knew she sounded crazy, hysterical. She didn’t care. “I am cold. And frigid. A bitch who cares more for her own comfort than the dreams of her husband, than the hope of a family. Does that sound like the sort of woman you should have a fling with?”
She stood, her hands clenched at her sides, her breathing harsh. Speaking those words, giving voice to every terrible thing she’d been called, every horrible feeling that lived in her, made her feel powerful. It made her feel a little sick, too.
“Jessica … who said those things to you?” he asked, his voice rough.
“Who do you think?”
“Your husband?”
“Ex,” she said, the word never tasting so sweet.
“He was wrong,” he said.
“You don’t know that. I just turned you down, didn’t I?”
“And my ego remains intact.”
“Just go.”
“No. Help me understand,” he said. It was a quiet statement, a simple gesture. It was more than anyone else had ever asked from her or offered her.
“This is one of those things men don’t like to hear about. And by that I mean it contains the word uterus and pertains to that particular ‘time of the month’ that means a man can’t get any action.”
“Try me,” he said, his dark eyes never leaving hers, his jaw tense. “Scare me, Jess. I dare you.”
