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‘Don’t speak to me like that,’ Aristandros intoned with an icy bite to his words.
‘Se miso; I hate you!’ Ella spat at him.
Stalking across the bedroom, Ella took refuge in the bathroom. She was trembling and her eyes were scratchy with the tears she was fighting back. He had become her first lover, but she would sooner have cut out her tongue than admit that fact to him. She didn’t want to give him that satisfaction—the knowledge that she hadn’t got really close to any man since he had walked out of her life seven years earlier, telling her that she would regret turning him down until her dying day. She had met other men, but sadly nobody who had had the same effect on her as Aristandros Xenakis. Having loved and lost him, she had been determined not to settle for anything less. And those high standards had ensured she’d stayed single and alone.
Recognising just how far she had now fallen from her own ideals hurt. Ari made her feel vulnerable and threatened. She already felt as though he had turned her inside out. She got into the shower to freshen up, still shaken that he should have noticed that she was something less than experienced. After years of athletic activity and the egg-donation process that had resulted in her sister conceiving, Ella had been confident that he would have no reason to ever guess the truth. Her pride utterly denied him any right to that truth.
She was wrapped in a towel when a knock sounded on the door. She flung it open. ‘What now?’
‘What’s the matter with you?’ Aristandros demanded rawly. ‘We’re good together. Tomorrow you meet Callie. What’s wrong?’
The sound of her niece’s name, the tacit reminder of their agreement, steadied Ella. ‘Nothing’s wrong. It’s been a long day, and I suppose I’m tired,’ she muttered, sidestepping him to leave the bathroom.
In the dressing room she selected a strappy nightdress and got back into bed, scolding herself for her loss of temper and control. She was being stupid. Antagonising Aristandros was pure insanity. Bitten, he would bite back, and she had the most to lose. She was not necessary to him and far from irreplaceable. Any number of women would be happy to assume the role of mistress, and none of them was likely to shout at him or insult him. He wasn’t accustomed to that kind of treatment and he wouldn’t tolerate it.
At dawn the following morning, she listened while Aristandros showered and dressed and left the room before she drifted off to sleep again. A maid wakened her a couple of hours later and told her that Aristandros would breakfast with her when she was ready. Aware that within a few hours at most she would be meeting Callie, Ella leapt out of bed with enthusiasm and rushed to get dressed. Breathless and unbelievably tense, she entered the elegant modern dining-room.
‘Good morning,’ she breathed stiltedly, every skin cell in her body jumping as Aristandros cast down his copy of the Financial Times and rose to his full, commanding height.
Having sex with him had increased her awareness by a factor of at least a hundred. Uneasily conscious of the intimate ache between her thighs and the still-swollen contours of her mouth, she felt the hot blood of embarrassment engulf her face with uncomfortable warmth even before she met his brilliant dark-golden eyes. He gave her a steady look that betrayed nothing beyond his rock-solid assurance and cool.
For some reason she remembered their first date seven years back, when he had wakened her whole family by arriving unannounced at an early hour to take her out sailing on his yacht. Her stepfather, had fawned on him to a mortifying degree while her twin half-brothers had hovered, unsure whether to approve or disapprove of a mega-rich Xenakis with a bad reputation taking an interest in one of their sisters. Only her mother had had reservations. Ella hadn’t really appreciated just how rich, powerful and well-known Aristandros was until she saw the way other people treated him.
She was surprised by how much of an appetite she had, and she ate a good breakfast before asking tautly, ‘Is Callie on her way here?’
‘No. She’ll be waiting for us on Hellenic Lady with her nurse. We’re sailing home to Greece,’ Aristandros informed her.
Like all of his family, Aristandros was never happier than when he was on a boat. Susie had complained bitterly about Timon’s love of the water, which she had not shared.
‘I hope she likes me,’ Ella muttered before she could think better of revealing that admission of insecurity.
‘Of course she will.’ Aristandros shot her a lingering look redolent of very male appreciation.
Her cheeks warming, Ella stirred her coffee.
‘She’s also very lucky I let you get out of bed this morning,’ he husked.
Ella dealt him a startled glance from her vivid blue eyes.
Aristandros rested a lean-fingered brown hand on her slim thigh and urged her round to face him. ‘I wanted to keep you awake all night. Moderation isn’t my style, koukla mou.’
Wildly conscious of the unashamed hunger that had flared like liquid gold in his intense gaze, Ella found herself leaning forward to speed up the meeting of her mouth with his. She could not have explained what prompted her to make that encouraging move. But that spontaneous kiss was indescribably sweet and intoxicating, and it sent every nerve-ending jumping with vibrant energy and response. A quickening sensation thrummed low in her pelvis. A moment later, his hand was meshed in her hair, holding her to him, and a moment after that he had lifted her right out of the chair into his arms. Excitement blazed through her like solar flares as he carried her back to the bedroom …
CHAPTER FIVE
ELLA was so taut with anticipation that her heart almost leapt out of her chest when she first saw Callie in the reception salon of the Xenakis yacht.
At a glance she recognised how much her biological child resembled her, with that silvery-blonde cap of hair and those almond-shaped blue eyes. She wondered with painful regret if ironically that pronounced similarity had unleashed Susie’s insecurity over her role as Callie’s mother. The little girl straightened up to turn away from the toy she was playing with and focused not on Ella but on Aristandros. But, instead of toddling forward to greet the tall Greek as Ella expected, Callie waved at him and smiled. Aristandros waved back.
‘She always smiles when she sees me,’ Aristandros commented, evidently content with the style of his greeting.
Ella went over to meet her niece and got down on her knees, her heart lurching as she studied the child, whose very blue eyes were curious. A shy little hand reached out to touch Ella’s equally pale hair and then hastily withdrew again. Recognising Callie’s fear of the unfamiliar, Ella began talking to introduce herself, and within minutes totally forgot the presence of Aristandros and the Greek nursemaid stationed on the other side of the vast salon. When she recalled their presence she looked back over there but Aristandros had gone.
She soon discovered that Callie lit up when she heard music and loved to dance. The little girl giggled in delight when Ella joined in, and the atmosphere became much more relaxed. When refreshments were served, Ella sat down to get acquainted with her niece’s youthful nurse, Kasma, and find out about the child’s routine. While the two women talked, Ella made a hat out of a napkin to amuse Callie, who was becoming fractious. Callie finally consented to sit on Ella’s lap to enjoy a fruit snack. Momentarily the warm, solid baby weight of the toddler resting trustingly against her made happy tears wash the back of Ella’s eyes; this was a moment that she had truly believed she would never know in reality. Just then, every sacrifice she had made seemed more than worthwhile.
Kasma had a good deal to tell her that was of interest. The young woman stood in too much awe of Aristandros even to imply criticism of her employer. Even so, what Ella learned from subtle questions soon convinced Ella that Aristandros had zero parenting skills and, quite possibly, no interest in rectifying that deficiency. By then Callie was fast asleep in her arms, and Ella followed Kasma down to the lower-deck cabin which was set up as a nursery and put her niece in her cot for a nap.
Keen to freshen up—something Ella hadn’t had a chance to do earlier that day after their rushed late departure from the London penthouse—she returned to the main cabin suite, where she took a shower in the superb marble wet-room. She couldn’t stop smiling as she relived the afternoon that had just passed. The hours had just melted away while she’d been with Callie. A stewardess came to tell her that Aristandros was waiting for her in the salon. Ella finished drying her hair, her body tingling in outrageous tune with her thoughts, because she could not forget the pure, erotic excitement of Aristandros’s love-making at the outset of the day, or the blissful release she had once again experienced in his arms.
‘A change of plan—we’re flying to Paris in an hour,’ Aristandros announced when she joined him.
‘Paris?’ Her eyes homed in on him straight away and involuntarily clung to his compellingly handsome features. Even in the formal garb of a black pinstripe business-suit and dark silk tie, he emanated a charge of raw sexuality and animal energy that made her mouth run dry as a bone. ‘Why?’
‘Some friends are having a party, and I’m looking forward to showing you off.’
‘But Callie’s in bed and exhausted. She’s just flown in from Greece,’ Ella reminded him uncomfortably.
‘She can sleep during the flight.’ Aristandros shrugged, instantly dismissing her protest. ‘Children are very resilient. I must have travelled round the world with my parents a score of times by her age. How did you get on with her?’
‘We got on great, but it’ll take time for her to bond with me.’
‘You’ll still be a better mother than Susie ever was,’ Aristandros forecast with a hint of derision.
Astonishment and annoyance at that criticism flared through Ella in defence of her late sister. ‘What on earth makes you say that?’
Engaged in flicking through a business file, Aristandros raised a sleek ebony brow and glanced up again. ‘I’m not afraid of the truth, and death doesn’t purchase sainthood. You should never have agreed to your sister’s request that you donate eggs to enable her to become pregnant. Susie couldn’t handle it. An anonymous donor would have been a safer bet.’
‘What are you talking about?’ Ella demanded angrily.
Aristandros dealt her an impatient look. ‘Don’t tell me that you never realised that as far as Susie was concerned you were the kid sister from hell? You outshone her in looks and intelligence, and compounded your sins by attracting my interest.’
‘That’s complete nonsense!’
‘It’s not. Susie tried to lure me long before she ever looked at Timon, but I didn’t bite.’
Ella was shattered by a piece of information that had never come her way before. Susie had been attracted to Aristandros? That possibility, that very private and dangerous little fact, had never once occurred to her. ‘Is that honestly the truth?’
Aristandros frowned. ‘Why would I lie about it? I wasn’t pleased when Susie started dating Timon, but he fell hook, line and sinker for her.’
Ella had lost colour, the fine bones of her profile prominent below her creamy skin. All of a sudden things that she had not understood but which had given her an uneasy feeling were being explained—her sister’s constant, tactless carping about Ari’s inability to stay faithful throughout the period when Ella had been seeing him; her repeated angry accusations that Ella didn’t appreciate just how lucky she was.
‘No matter what your sister did, Timon forgave her because he loved her. But, when you made it possible for them to have a child together and Susie turned her back on that child, Timon couldn’t accept it.’
Ella gave him a stricken appraisal. ‘Susie turned her back on Callie? How?’
‘She left their staff to take care of her. Having got the baby she insisted she could not live without, she rejected her. Timon was at his wit’s end. He consulted doctors on her behalf. Susie refused to see them, and finally Timon began to talk about divorcing Susie and applying for sole custody of Callie. Their marriage was very much on the rocks when they died.’
Her consternation and sadness at that news palpable, Ella sank heavily down on a chair. ‘I had no idea that the situation was so serious. If only I had known, if only Susie had been willing to see me and talk to me after Callie’s birth, maybe I could have—’
‘You were the last person who could have helped her. She was too jealous of you.’
‘It’s perfectly possible that Susie was suffering from severe post-natal depression. Didn’t my family try to help her?’ Ella prompted feverishly.
‘I don’t think they recognised the extent of the problem, or that they wanted to get involved once they realised that Susie’s marriage was in grave trouble,’ Aristandros said flatly.
Ella knew that in such circumstances her domineering stepfather would have urged her mother to mind her own business, and that her mother would not have had the backbone to stand up to him even if she’d disagreed. She felt unbearably sad. Had Susie been suffering from depression? Evidently, however, even Timon had been unable to persuade her sibling to seek professional help. Poor Callie had had a troubled and insecure life right from the moment of her birth. Ella thought that it was hardly surprising that the little girl was quiet and somewhat behind in her development.
‘How much time have you spent with Callie?’ Ella asked Aristandros.
His well-defined black brows pleated, as if he suspected a trick question. ‘I see her every day that we’re under the same roof.’
‘But do you play with her? Talk to her? Hold her?’
Aristandros winced at those blunt questions. ‘I’m not a touchy-feely guy. That’s what you’re here for.’
Ella breathed in deep and stood up. ‘I don’t want to offend you, but I have to be frank. At the moment, all you seem to do is wave at her from the doorway of her nursery once or twice a day.’
Aristandros frowned and threw up his hands in objection at her censorious tone. ‘It’s a little game we play. What harm does it do?’
Ella was hanging on to her temper only by a hair’s breadth. He was not that obtuse. He could hardly believe that he was playing father of the year with a long-distance wave. ‘Callie needs to be touched and talked to and played with. The reason she didn’t rush to greet you today is because you’ve got her accustomed to only seeing you at a distance—and that’s how you like it, isn’t it? Handsoff parenting? But she needs real contact with you—’
‘What am I supposed to do with a baby?’ Lean, strong face hard with impatience and hauteur, Aristandros ground out that demand, clearly offended by her criticism. ‘I’m a very busy man and I’m doing my best.’
‘I know you are. You just need a little direction,’ Ella murmured, suddenly wondering if the closest he had ever got to his own dysfunctional parents was a breezy, noncommittal wave from the nursery door. ‘And then you’d be brilliant, because you always do well at anything you set out to do.’
His dark eyes gleamed at that assurance while a wicked slow-burning smile tilted his beautiful mouth. ‘Flattery will get you nowhere, glikia mou.’
‘Will you think again about flying to Paris—for Callie’s sake?’ Ella pressed softly.
‘You don’t do sweet and submissive well.’
Mortified by the derisive tone that let her know that he had seen straight through her attempt to talk him round to her way of thinking, Ella stood straight as a blade, colour burnishing her cheeks. ‘I was trying to be tactful.’
‘I don’t like it. It doesn’t suit you,’ Aristandros spelt out without skipping a beat. ‘On the very first day you meet Callie, do I need to remind you that I make all the decisions where she’s concerned?’
Ella turned very pale at that blunt reminder. She met cold eyes, the warning look of a strong male who had no intention of allowing his authority to be challenged. Her tummy flipped. He made her appreciate all over again that he was the one in control, and that she was walking a dangerous path from which she could not afford to stray. It was clear that he intended to hold her to the very letter of the agreement he had made her sign. She had promised not to interfere in Callie’s upbringing. All of a sudden she was appreciating just how difficult it was likely to be to take care of Callie while following his rules.
‘We come first in this instance, not the child. Don’t let her come between us and cause discord,’ Aristandros advised her with forbidding emphasis.
Ella wanted to tell him how selfish and unreasonable he was being, but he had just delineated her boundaries as a warning and she did not dare. Aristandros Xenakis had spent thirty-two years on the earth doing exactly what he liked at all times. She might try to guide, but he would never allow her to lead. Who was she to think she could change him? The chill in the atmosphere raised gooseflesh on her bare arms and she turned to leave.
‘Where are you going?’
Her spine prickled with apprehension. ‘I, er, need to work out what I’m going to wear this evening.’
‘No need. As yet you don’t have a proper wardrobe. My staff will organise a selection of dresses to be brought to my Paris home for you, and your maid will do your packing. There’s very little that you need to do for yourself now.’
Ella flipped back round. ‘Sometimes you scare me …’ And the instant she voiced that admission she regretted it, but there it was: the complete unvarnished truth.
Aristandros cast aside the file and vaulted upright. His astute eyes were unreadable, his fabulous bone-structure taut. ‘I don’t want that.’
Ella pinned her tremulous lips closed. ‘I can’t help the way I feel.’
‘You’re one of the strongest women I’ve ever known,’ Aristandros countered.
But he was making a coward of her because if she spoke her mind she stood to lose too much, Ella conceded bitterly. Aristandros closed a hand over hers and tugged her closer. With an imperious shift of his handsome head, he smoothed her fingers straight and linked their hands. ‘If it’s that important, I’ll make more effort with Callie.’ Unusually he hesitated, his wide, sensual mouth compressing. ‘I don’t know how to go about it, though. I didn’t have a conventional childhood.’
Ella was well aware that even that minor admission of ignorance was a major step for him, and that any sort of change of heart on his part was to be warmly appreciated and encouraged, but she was still so tense and worked up that her hand trembled in his. ‘I know,’ she said feelingly, her heart lurching inside her, for his cruelly troubled childhood had been lived out in the full glare of the media spotlight thanks to his larger-than-life parents and was very well documented.
‘My earliest memory is of my father shouting at my mother when I almost drowned in a swimming pool. They were either drunk or high …’ A broad shoulder shifted, his strong face hardening. ‘They were so busy fighting they left me out on the terrace and forgot about me again. I know what not to do if you have a child.’
‘Yes, of course you do,’ she agreed. ‘When you’re a kid it’s so frightening when you see adults fighting and out of control. The first time I saw Theo hit my mother, I thought the world was going to end …’ As Ella realised what she had inadvertently revealed, she was appalled by her carelessness, and she fell silent.
‘Repeat that,’ Aristandros urged, his narrowed gaze reflecting his stunned reaction. ‘The first time you saw your stepfather hit your mother?’
Ella was aghast at what she had let drop. ‘I don’t want to talk about it. I really didn’t mean to say that!’
Aristandros lifted a hand to tip up her chin so that her eyes were forced to meet his. ‘But now that you have, there’s no going back or denying it. Theo Sardelos is in the habit of hitting your mother?’
Ella was pale as death, and full of the shame she had never been able to shake over that sordid reality. ‘I don’t think the violence happens as much now as it once did … at least, I would hope not,’ she confided jerkily. ‘But it’s been so long since I had any contact with them, I really have no idea.’
‘Did he ever hit you?’ Aristandros growled.
‘No, only my mother. It’s a pity he didn’t have a legal agreement drawn up like you did before they got married, though I’m not sure she would have signed up if she’d known what she was in for!’
‘What the hell are you saying?’ Aristandros grated.
‘Well, that’s why he beat her up—she objected when he didn’t come home at night. He was always with other women,’ Ella explained grudgingly. ‘I think he had affairs with every secretary he ever had, as well as with some of the friends Mum made over the years. Like you, he’s very attractive to the opposite sex and an incorrigible womaniser.’
Brilliant dark eyes assailed hers with cold, hostile force. ‘I’ve never hurt a woman in my life, nor would I.’
‘I didn’t insinuate that you would. That’s not why you scare me,’ Ella extended tightly. ‘You scare me because you’re so cold-blooded, so tough and determined to win every bout. It’s your way or the highway, and trying not to fall foul of that is a constant challenge.’
‘I don’t want you to feel like that, but I can’t change what I am.’ Aristandros breathed, with a raw edge to his deep drawl. ‘The fact you compared me to Theo Sardelos is revealing. You see us as similar personalities, a comparison which I absolutely reject. But I am shocked by what I have just learned. I can hardly credit that you never breathed a word to me about what was going on in your own home seven years ago.’
‘It was a private matter. I grew up with a mother who swore me and my siblings to silence. We were brought up to be ashamed of it and keep it hidden. The violence was never, ever discussed. Everybody tried to pretend it didn’t happen.’
‘Even your brothers?’ Aristandros prompted with growing incredulity. ‘Susie never mentioned it to Timon either.’
‘Susie just ignored it, and the twins were still quite young when I left home to go to university. I don’t know how things stand now. I’ve always hoped it stopped, but I suspect that was rather foolish wishful thinking,’ she muttered heavily. ‘Look, can we please drop this subject?’
Unsympathetic to that plea, Aristandros settled his smouldering gaze on her. ‘You thought I might be like your stepfather, didn’t you? That’s one of the reasons you wouldn’t marry me.’
‘I don’t want to discuss this any more,’ Ella told him quietly, and she turned on her heel and simply walked out of the salon. She was shaking like a leaf and cursing her unwary tongue. There was no way she could tell him the truth. Of course she had seen a similarity between him and her stepfather. But with Aristandros it had not been violence she feared, but the terrible pain, constant fear and suspicion of living with an unfaithful partner. She had loved him too much to face that prospect.
Ella was overseeing her packing when Aristandros strode into the state room. With a casual movement of one hand he dismissed the maid while wrenching off his tie with the other. ‘You’ve kept too many secrets from me, moli mou,’ he delivered harshly. ‘I don’t like that. I will tell you now—that has to change.’
Ella slanted a feathery brow. ‘Just like that?’