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‘Hmm? That’s not why I’m here.’
It was exactly why I was there. Even though my dreams about Nick were quite hopeless by then, I couldn’t stop wishing. It’s not easy getting over someone when you’re around him every day at work.
‘I only came in to get you out of the office,’ I lied. ‘You’re not supposed to be working on your day off.’
‘And you’re not supposed to be stalking on your day off.’
Touché. We should both have been away from work doing better things.
She closed her laptop. ‘Do you want to do something? I told Callum I might meet him later, but it’s not set in stone. We can get a drink if you like.’
‘June, you cannot keep blowing Callum off,’ I said. ‘He’ll get sick of it eventually, and then he’ll dump you.’
But she shook her head. ‘The less I see of him, the more he likes me.’
‘By your logic, he’ll be in love with you if you never see him again. Doesn’t it seem a little bit, I don’t know, unhelpful to your sex life never to see your boyfriend?’
I could never do that. When I’m mad for someone I can’t keep away from him. Well, obviously, because there I was at work on a Saturday, on the off-chance that I might see Nick.
And June was mad for Callum. Mad like I’d never seen her before. It was easy to see why. He was gorgeous and fit and loads of fun, and they were really going for it, hot-and-heavy-wise, when they first got together. But then he made one little joke about her trying to handcuff him when she suggested a weekend break, and she started playing so hard to get that he had more chance of winning the lottery than seeing her.
He was still keen, so far, but for how long?
‘Come on, I’ll walk out with you,’ she said.
I might not have seen Nick, but at least I got her away from work. ‘Go see Callum,’ I urged her when we got to our cars.
‘Maybe.’
Dad rang me around midnight. ‘Phoebe, this is your father.’
‘What’s happened?’
But I knew, even as I asked the question. Mum wasn’t invincible after all.
The doctors were baffled. None of the tests had shown that cardiac arrest was imminent. But then, Mum always did love to surprise people.
She left behind pages and pages of notes in her sprawling handwriting. Like she couldn’t get the words on the page fast enough. That’s what she’d been doing on her mobile all the time. Planning her last hurrah, just in case. She’d probably spent her final hours on earth trying to figure out which canapes would most impress their neighbours.
At twenty-eight, I was half orphaned. I was also stuck with such a confusing mishmash of feelings about Mum that I didn’t have the faintest idea what to do with them. All I could do after the funeral was to throw myself back into my life and hope for the best.
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