For The Sake Of His Child

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‘Of course not,’ Gina said. ‘He thinks it’s his fault.’

He looked at her strangely. ‘Is that how it was for you?’

‘Something like that. I was lucky in my mother—she was wonderful, but she died. My father—well, I think he actually found me repellent. And I knew I must have done something terrible to make him not love me.’

‘And that’s what Joey thinks?’

‘He told me that his mother loves him. He probably explains her absences by blaming himself. But I’m only guessing.’

‘So what do I do?’ Carson demanded. ‘Explain to him that his mother is a selfish woman who loves nobody but herself? That she remembers him when it suits her and abandons him when it suits her? Why do you think I’m trying to separate them finally? Because I can’t stand the look on his face when she leaves again—as she always does.’

‘But she’s his mother—she must love him, in her own way—’

‘Then why didn’t she take him with her? I wouldn’t have tried to stop her, if she’d really wanted him. Don’t judge every mother by your own. They’re not all wonderful.’

‘I’m sorry,’ she said helplessly. ‘I had no right to criticise you without knowing all the facts.’

He ran a hand through his hair, dishevelling it. At some point he’d removed his tie and torn open the throat of his shirt. The man in control had slipped away, leaving only the man distracted by forces he didn’t understand.

‘I guess I can’t blame you on that score,’ he said. ‘It’s something I do myself. What are all the facts? How can you ever know?’

‘Tell me about Mrs Saunders. Is she qualified to help Joey?’

‘I thought so. Brenda hired her. Apparently she once worked in a school for children with special needs. But Joey dislikes her. He has violent tantrums. Only yesterday he had a terrible screaming fit.’

‘But that’s frustration. It’s not fair to call it a tantrum.’

‘Maybe not. But I think that’s why Mrs Saunders took today off. She needed a rest. Who’s that?’

The doorbell had rung. Frowning, Carson went to answer it, and returned with Dan.

‘You said your car was still being repaired,’ he explained, ‘so I thought I’d give you a lift home.’

‘Very thoughtful,’ Carson said, ‘but I would have provided Miss Tennison with a taxi.’ He looked at her reluctantly. ‘Were you anxious to leave?’

‘That depends on Joey.’

‘It’s about his bedtime.’

‘Why don’t you put him to bed?’ Dan said to Gina. ‘I’m sure he’d like that.’

His smile was full of cheerful kindness, yet it struck a strangely false note with Gina. She didn’t have time to brood over it. She signed bedtime to Joey, and he jumped up and came with her eagerly.

‘I won’t be long,’ she told the two men.

‘Don’t hurry too much, darling,’ Dan muttered to her. ‘I’ve been trying to meet Carson Page for months.’

So that was it. She couldn’t really blame Dan. He worked hard and he had his way to make in the world. But tonight had been about Joey and his needs, and Dan’s opportunism jarred with her.

While Joey got into the shower she returned to his room to fetch the towelling robe she’d seen hanging behind his door. On the way back, she stopped and looked over the banisters. She could just see where Dan and Carson were sitting together, talking. At least, Dan was talking. All she could see of Carson was his back, but something in the set of his shoulders told her that he was finding Dan’s monologue hard going.

Joey turned off the shower and came out straight into the bathrobe she was holding up for him.

‘An—ooo!’ he said painfully. Thank you.

She put him to bed, and asked him, signing, if he wanted to read. He shook his head and lay looking up at her from his pillow, smiling. He seemed relaxed and happy, quite different from the tense, nervous child of the afternoon. Impulsively Gina leaned down and kissed him.

‘Is he ready to go to sleep?’ Carson asked from the door.

‘Just waiting for you to come and say goodnight,’ Gina told him.

She stood back so that father and son could hug each other, but Carson only said awkwardly, ‘Goodnight, son.’

Joey struggled to say goodnight, and managed the word pretty well, but Gina could feel Carson’s tension.

‘Goodnight, Joey,’ she said.

She was about to turn away, but Joey detained her with a hand on her arm. She sat on his bed and watched as he pointed at himself, then curled over the middle three fingers of his hand so that the thumb and the little finger made a Y shape. With this he made a gentle waving motion, then finished by pointing at her. A shy smile touched his lips.

‘What did he say?’ Carson asked.

‘He says he likes me.’ Smiling, Gina indicated herself, made the Y gesture, then pointed at Joey.

I like you.

Suddenly she was gasping for breath as a pair of young arms tightened around her neck in an embrace that was both eager and desperate. She hugged him back, but it was some time before she could make him release her.