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‘It was no trouble. I’m just glad to know you’re home,’ she said awkwardly. ‘Everyone on the unit wants to know when you’re coming back.’
‘It might be if rather than when,’ he replied. ‘I’ve got some thinking to do, Jenny, but I’ll be around to see you all soon.’
He finished his conversation with Jenny, but almost immediately the phone rang again. This time it was Laura.
‘Gabriel! You’re home! Thank goodness! How does it feel?’
‘Quiet, peaceful,’ he replied. ‘Jenny has done what you asked so I’m going to have a snack lunch and then maybe a walk in the park. I see that next door is up for sale. Did you know?’
‘Er, yes. Jeremy phoned to tell me.’
‘Why would he do that, then?’
‘I don’t know. I wasn’t interested and told him so,’ she said levelly, and into the silence that followed added, ‘When are you coming to see the children?’
‘Soon,’ he replied. ‘One day during the week maybe.’
‘I see,’ she replied, and she did. She saw that Gabriel had no intention of taking up where they’d left off on that dreadful afternoon. They’d lived like strangers in the same house after the event while waiting for the case to come up, and she was no more eager than he was to go back to that kind of life.
The move to Swallowbrook hadn’t just been because of her uncle’s generous gift of the house. She’d harboured a secret hope that it might be a new beginning with Gabriel away from the happenings of the past in a beautiful place, but it seemed that he had other ideas and when they’d finished the call she wept for all that they’d lost.
Laura had chaired a meeting of the doctors the night before to discuss a project that was already under way—the building of a clinic for cancer patients that Nathan Gallagher was keen to see take place on the same plot of land as the surgery.
The relevant authorities in the area had approved it and work had already started. The practice building had once been a farmhouse where Libby, his wife, had been brought up, and there was land to spare all around it.
The intention was that the clinic should be an offshoot of the local hospital’s oncology department, which was always extremely busy, and if plans went ahead it would be somewhere for local people to see a consultant without a longer wait than was necessary.
Libby hadn’t been at the meeting. She was retiring from the practice very soon and had suggested that Laura take Sophie and Josh round to their place to play with Toby until it was over.
When she’d dropped them off Libby had thought that the new practice manager looked tired and stressed but hadn’t said anything, as on getting to know her better she was realising that Laura Armitage was a very private person.
The other woman in the practice, Hugo Lawrence’s delightful new wife Ruby, who had joined them as a junior doctor some time ago, had similar feelings about the new practice manager and was doing her best to make her feel at home. She felt that Laura was under pressure of some kind and it was noticeable that there was never any mention of the children’s father in any conversation with her.
Though not so with her young daughter, Sophie was obviously in touch with her father, even if her mother wasn’t, if the number of times she mentioned him was anything to go by.
After speaking to Gabriel on Friday morning, Laura decided that if life had felt unreal ever since he’d come charging in and found the opportunist from next door using her distress to get to know her better, the stilted conversation they’d just had on the phone took unreality into a new dimension.
He still believed she’d been about to cheat on him, she thought. That she’d turned to Jeremy Saunders of all people because of his own neglect of her, and that maybe it hadn’t been the first time. Never having been prepared to discuss it with her since, now he was making it clear that there wasn’t going to be any loving reunion, not as far as he was concerned anyway.
Sleep was long in coming when she went to bed. As she lay wide-eyed beneath the eaves of Swallows Barn, Laura heard Sophie call out his name on a sob and couldn’t believe that Gabriel could stay away from the children now that he was free. If he didn’t want to be with her, fine, but he adored Sophie and Josh, and if he didn’t appear for them soon she would … What? File for divorce and have to live without him for evermore?
CHAPTER TWO
ON THE Sunday after Gabriel’s release from prison, Laura set off with the children for a picnic on an island in the middle of the lake. It was a quiet and peaceful place, uninhabited except for just one property—an attractive house built from lakeland stone and appropriately named Greystone House.
They had told her at the surgery that it belonged to Libby and Nathan Gallagher, that he had bought it for her as a wedding present, and she’d thought how romantic that was. It seemed that the two of them and their small son spent every weekend there.
This Sunday the two doctors were going to the wedding of a friend who lived down south and so there would be no one but her and the children on the island today.
Sophie and Josh were keen to explore everywhere and as it was small enough for her to keep them in view all the time, she was happy to let them wander where they wanted as long as they didn’t trespass on land belonging to the house.
Once they were happily occupied she set out the picnic for when they would be ready to eat, and then opening up the folding chair that she had brought with her settled herself on it and let her thoughts take over.
It hurt that Gabriel hadn’t rushed straight up here to see the children at least, though he obviously had no interest in rebuilding their marriage.
She often thought that if she hadn’t gone to the hospital as his patient that day, he wouldn’t have come home so early, and when Jeremy had taken advantage of her distress, she would have sent him packing without Gabriel knowing anything about it and it would have been the end of the incident.
But Gabriel’s timing had been all wrong and so had Jeremy’s for that matter. They had all paid a high price for what had happened in the moment when his self-control had snapped. She could hear the engines of another passenger launch approaching and she sighed. It had stopped, and the peace she craved would be gone if others had the same thought in mind that she’d had.
Calling Sophie and Josh to her, she began to pour the cold drinks that she’d brought and almost dropped the flask when a shadow fell across her and the children came to a halt as if they’d seen a ghost.
She turned slowly with a tingling down her spine and when she looked up Gabriel was there, observing her gravely, and it was as if the four of them had been turned to stone, until Sophie broke the silence by crying ‘Daddy!’ and began running towards him, with Josh not far behind. As he scooped them up into his arms Laura saw the wetness of tears on his cheeks and thought achingly that this was a moment that none of them should ever have had to endure, but it had been thrust upon them. Where did they go from here?
Desperate to get away from the place where her life had been shattered, she’d spent the time that Gabriel had been away from her and the children picking up the pieces by moving to a new home in a beautiful Lakeland paradise, and although it had only been half a life without him there, she’d coped and would continue to do so whatever the outcome of his coming back to them.
When the children had calmed down after lots of hugs and kisses and were tucking into the food, she asked in a low voice, ‘How did you know where to find us?’
‘I didn’t. I was parking the car by the lakeside when I saw the three of you in the distance boarding one of the launches, but it had sailed by the time I got there. I asked the girl in the ticket office if she knew where you were bound for. She said the island, so I caught the next boat.’
‘I see. So you decided to come earlier?’
‘Yes, but I’m not staying.’
‘Oh, fine!’ she said coolly. ‘The children won’t like that! Don’t you think they’ve waited long enough to be with you?’
‘Yes, I do, but, Laura, my life has been on hold for long enough. I have things to sort out at the hospital, matters that have accumulated while I’ve been in prison. I want the way ahead to be clear with regard to my career, so that I know my position, what I’m doing.’
The hurt inside her was beyond bearing as she listened to what he was saying and it came forth in anger as she said tightly, ‘So nothing changes Gabriel? It’s still career first and family second.’ She glanced at the children, who were out of earshot. ‘Well, don’t let us stop you. Do dash off to wherever it is you prefer to be.’
‘Would it be all right to stay the night?’ he asked, with no answer forthcoming to her protest.
‘You shouldn’t need to ask!’
The vestige of a smile was tugging at the corners of the mouth that had kissed her a thousand times in what seemed like another life.
‘All right, then,’ he said, adding with grim humour, ‘Just as long as the sheets are of Egyptian cotton. My bedding of recent months has hardly been luxurious, and if the house has a spare room, that will do fine’
She turned away. How could he joke about something like that and at the same time make it clear that he didn’t want to sleep with her? With a change of subject she pointed to the food and said stiffly, ‘There is plenty to eat. What would you like to drink?’
As he squatted down on the grass, with the children chattering one on either side, it seemed so normal that she could hardly believe that for what had seemed like for ever the only man she had ever loved had been serving a custodial sentence for grievous bodily harm because of what had been the worst day of her life.
‘I hope you’ll like the house,’ she said uncomfortably when they arrived at Swallows Barn with the children still on a high, having been driven home in Gabriel’s car.
‘If you are happy with it, that is all that matters,’ he said levelly.
Sophie urged, ‘Come and see my room, Daddy!’
‘And mine!’ Josh said, and as the three of them went upstairs together Laura thought that Gabriel could tell the children that he wasn’t staying. She wasn’t going to be responsible for causing them any upset.
When they were asleep after receiving a promise from their father that he would take them to school the next morning, an awkward silence fell upon the house until it was broken by Gabriel asking casually, ‘So what is the medical centre like in this place, Laura?’
Was that all he could talk about, health care? But she answered civilly enough, explaining who was who and outlining her responsibilities.
They’d passed the practice on the way home and he’d noticed that a new building was being erected on the large plot of land next to it and had wanted to know what it was going to be.
‘It is going to be a clinic that will be an offshoot of the main oncology unit at the local hospital,’ she told him. ‘All the staff at the surgery are very excited about it.’
‘Hmm, impressive forward thinking,’ he commented. ‘When is it due to open?’
‘Some time in the autumn if all goes according to plan.’
But she had questions of her own to ask and they weren’t about health care. It was the first time she’d had the opportunity to ask him what it had been like being shut away from his life’s work at the hospital and his family, and was hoping that his reply would give her some degree of understanding of the stranger that he had become.
‘So what was it like in there?’ she asked gently, and watched his face close up.
‘It was a piece of cake.’
‘I’m not asking for mockery,’ she told him. ‘I want the truth.’
It had been hell on earth being away from them, but he had brought it on himself. He must have been insane to think that Laura would have anything to do with the low life from next door, but seeing that creep with his arms around her had ignited a fury like he’d never known. Perhaps in hindsight his uncharacteristic behaviour had been amplified by his feelings of guilt over neglecting Laura.
He’d flung himself at the man like a coiled spring and since that moment life had been totally unreal, but Laura was waiting for an answer and so, referring to the lighter side of his sentence, he said, ‘I worked in the prison hospital for most of the time, which provided some degree of job satisfaction, and had a constant stream of inmates queuing up outside my cell for advice regarding their health problems, true or imaginary, but the nights were long.’
How long he couldn’t bear to tell her, with visions of her coping with the children on her own, and in the middle of it all moving house, which showed clearly that by the time he was released she wanted to have made a new life for herself.
There had been indications that Laura wanted him to join her and the children in their new home, but he didn’t want to rush into anything. Things had been going wrong between them even before that terrible incident. There was no way he could sidle back into her life without having something to offer in the form of trust and understanding, and the reason for him returning to London the following day was connected with that.
‘And the rest of it?’ she persisted.
‘Not good in parts, but I had a debt to repay, didn’t I, Laura? And now I can get on with my life knowing that ghastly episode is over, that Saunders is fully recovered, and that you and the children are all right.’
‘And that is it?’
No, it isn’t, he wanted to tell her. When you came to see me as a patient I had to accept that I wasn’t being fair to you. That I was guilty of gross neglect, and shortly afterwards I found myself believing that you were betraying me with that guy of all people, that you’d turned to him for comfort. I should have known better, of course, but I wasn’t thinking straight at the time.
Instead he said, ‘For the present, yes. I’ll keep in touch of course and if you need me for anything don’t be afraid to ask.’ He looked around him. ‘Though you seem to be managing very well without me.
‘I sussed out the spare room while I was upstairs, so will get my case out of the car and settle down for the night if that’s all right with you.’
‘Don’t you want a meal first?’ she asked woodenly, bringing her mind back to basics, and when he shook his head a deadly calm began to settle upon her as the impact of his ‘don’t be afraid to ask’ comment took hold.
In a measured tone she said, ‘Just a moment before you go. You said if there is anything I need from you I have only to ask?’
He was observing her questioningly. ‘Yes, I did. So is there something?’
‘Yes. I want a divorce.’
She watched his jaw drop and amazement darken the hazel eyes looking into hers, and then he said in a grating voice that was nothing like his usual upbeat tone, ‘So I was wrong. Am I still going to be paying for what I did?’
‘And you think I’m not?’ she said, doing her best to keep all emotion out of her voice. She could be just as coldly analytical as Gabriel if that was how he wanted things. ‘I wanted you home, but not on the terms you’re laying down in such a patronising manner. I’ve been living for the day when you were free of that place. But it seems that while you’ve had time on your hands you’ve been making plans that don’t include me, which makes me think that you still aren’t sure about how you found me in somebody else’s arms, so, yes, Gabriel, I want a divorce!’
The strong lines of his face were set like granite as he turned and went out to the car without any further comment and when he came back inside she said, ‘Breakfast will be ready at eight o’clock and if you still intend taking the children to school, they have to be there for quarter to nine.’
‘Of course I’m going to take them,’ he said levelly. ‘I’ve never let them down!’ Like I have you, the voice of conscience said.
Gabriel couldn’t sleep. Twice he padded quietly to where the children were sleeping and gazed down on them tenderly, but the door of the master bedroom across the landing remained firmly shut. He had made everything worse between Laura and himself by not telling her what was in his mind. But first he had to speak to his friend James Lockyer, chairman of the board of governors at the hospital where he’d worked.
Jenny kept phoning to say how much they were all looking forward to his return, but she had no say in the matter, neither had those who had worked alongside him, and nor had he. So he wanted to get from James the full picture of what came next to put in front of Laura when he returned to the house where he’d felt like a visitor.
It had been at his suggestion that he’d slept in the spare room, not hers. Had she wanted him back in her bed?
But, no, how could she? Only hours before she’d asked him for a divorce. He’d been totally stunned at her request and was praying that it had been a spur-of-the-moment thing that she would change her mind about.
Breakfast was a stilted affair with only the children’s chatter to liven it up and when the three of them were ready for the short walk to the village school Laura told him, ‘I’ll be ready to go to the practice soon. What time do you intend leaving?’
‘As soon as I’ve seen the children safely inside I’ll be back for the car. I need to be in London before three o’clock.’
‘I’ll hang on, then, so that I can lock up once you’ve gone,’ she told him
‘Whatever,’ he agreed absently as his glance took in the vision she presented in a smart navy suit and white blouse with matching navy footwear, and the fair swathe of her hair swept back into a neat coil. She was so fantastic, he thought achingly. How could he have been so careless with the love they’d had for each other?
The children were tugging at him, with Sophie anxious to show off her father to her friends, and dressed in their neat school uniforms of gold and green and each carrying a small satchel they placed themselves one on either side of him and the trio disappeared in the direction of the village school.
When Gabriel came striding back half an hour later she was standing at the gate, waiting for him, and it felt like a dream. She’d imagined this moment so often, him walking towards her in sunshine, back where he belonged, and now that the time had come it was like groping through fog.
‘Have you got everything?’ she asked weakly as the shock waves of his nearness washed over her.
He nodded, and after locking up she waited to see what he would do next. Would he just drive off with a brief goodbye after her announcement of the previous night, she wondered, or give her a formal peck on the cheek?
As he bent towards her it seemed as if that was what it was going to be, but not so. His arms reached out to encircle her, his mouth was on hers and he kissed her long and lingeringly before letting her go, then without a word having passed between them he got into the car and drove off in the direction of the motorway that ran past the village.
She put her hand to her mouth. It was the first time he had touched her in any shape or form since that awful day, and she thought despairingly that she’d had to mention divorce for him to show any signs of still wanting her.
Yet he had gone for reasons best known to himself without any mention of when he would see her again. How was she supposed to feel? For now she chose to put her hurt and anger to one side and she set off for another day at the Swallowbrook Medical Practice.
On arriving, she went straight to her office on the lower ground floor and so didn’t see Nathan arrive dumbstruck after taking Toby to school.
‘I’ve just seen some guy seeing Laura’s children into school,’ he told Libby. ‘It would seem that the missing father has turned up!’
‘Really!’ she exclaimed. ‘What was he like?’
‘That’s just it!’ he told her with amazement unabated. ‘What are they called?’
‘Er, Sophie and Joshua?’
‘No! I mean their surname. It’s Armitage, isn’t it?’
‘Yes. Why?’
