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“Why don’t you give it to her?” Alyssa held the onesie-clad baby out to Everett.
He paused for a moment, then took Kennedy from her and tucked the little girl into the crook of his arm. As soon as she saw the bottle, she reached for it, pulling it to her mouth and sucking greedily. Within minutes she was asleep.
Alyssa eased the bottle away from her and placed it on the coffee table. When she looked up, Everett was watching her face.
“She’s a lucky little girl to have found you.”
The lump in her throat was less about the words and more about his tone of voice. Don’t do this to me, Everett. This is day one. We have years ahead of us. Birthdays, holidays, starting school, boyfriends, graduation… The thought frightened her less than the intensity in his eyes.
“She has us both.” She brushed a stray curl off Kennedy’s forehead, and raised the question that had been at the back of her mind all day. “I know why I’m doing this. What about you?”
“Oh, come on, Alyssa.” A corner of his mouth lifted. “When you asked Ray Torrington what would happen to Kennedy if we said no and then you gave me that look, you knew I wouldn’t be able to resist you.”
She shook her head. “Not good enough. That answer might work if we were still together and deciding where to eat out or go on our next vacation. But this is about being mom and dad to a baby. It’s a lifelong commitment.”
He was silent for a moment or two. “First of all, you did influence my decision. Because there is no way I would have done this with anyone other than you.”
And there goes the last of my composure…
When he spoke again, his voice was little more than a whisper. “But you’re right. Just like you, I will be doing this properly, starting with a request to my boss for a leave of absence. And the reason I’ll be doing it is that it’s for Sean.”
“Because you don’t think he killed himself?”
“Even if he did—and despite his crimes—we were friends once.” He tilted his head back against the cushions. “I remember one summer when we were in high school, we got into a prank war. Neither of us could back down from a challenge. Sean thought it would be funny to use duct tape to fasten the handle of my school locker closed just when we had an important assignment due in. In revenge, I coated the seat of his bike in peanut butter. The jokes got wilder, until, one day, I enlisted Casey’s help. We were holding Sean down and filling his shorts with ice cubes when my mom walked in. She took one look, said, ‘I’ll give you boys some privacy,’ and walked out again.”
Although she had only met Maribelle Colton a few times, Alyssa could picture the scene. “Your mom likes to keep it classy.”
“Always.” He smiled. “The point is, I have a hundred stories about Sean. We kept those challenges going into adulthood, always trying to get the better of each other. But our friendship wasn’t all pranks. There was the time I tumbled into the creek and he jumped in to save me. Or when he fell off a wall and cut his head open, so I rode home with him on my crossbar. He screwed up with the way he treated Casey, but the earlier memories didn’t die.” He looked down at Kennedy. “When he entrusted his child to me, he knew I would be there for her.”
Alyssa bowed her head. In all the years she’d known him, this was the most Everett had ever opened up to her. She’d never understood why he felt the need to conceal his emotions and had spent too many hours wondering whether he was trying to prevent conflict, protect her from hurt, or avoid worrying her. Would things have worked out differently if he’d been able to express his feelings?
She gave a tiny shake of her head. It wasn’t his emotional detachment that had ended their relationship. Everett had been the one to suggest taking things to the next level. He’d asked her to move in with him and Alyssa had acted like a jackrabbit when it heard the cry of a wolf. Dating Agent Everett Colton had been difficult enough. Knowing he went out to work every day and put himself in danger was hard, but she could just about switch off from it and enjoy the time they spent together. If she lived with him, if she was watching the clock, waiting for him to come home at the end of each day…?
“We should get this little one into her crib.” And leave the past where it belongs.
Everett shuffled to the edge of the sofa and got cautiously to his feet. Carrying her as though she was a piece of priceless china, he took the baby through to the master bedroom. Earlier that evening, he had positioned her crib next to the bed, and Alyssa had placed the photograph of Kennedy with her parents on a nearby side table.
After spending a few moments shifting back and forth to find the right position, he lowered her into the crib.
Kennedy made a soft noise of protest and Everett gave Alyssa a look of pure panic. She shook her head and pointed toward the door. Like teenagers sneaking out to a party, they tiptoed from the room.
Alyssa choked back a laugh as she switched on the baby monitor she’d found in one of the boxes. “The look on your face.”
“What do you mean?” he whispered, sneaking a look over his shoulder at the closed bedroom door.
“When you thought Kennedy was about to wake up, your expression reminded me of that time I started choking on my soda.”
“Hey, that was scary. You nearly passed out.” He threw himself down on the sofa, hands linked behind his head, long legs crossed at the ankles.
“It was your fault,” she reminded him. “You made me laugh in midswallow.”
“Yeah. But I wasn’t expecting the whole wheezing, throat-clutching, eyes-watering response.” He gave her a sidelong glance. “You frightened the life out of me.”
“That’s how you looked at Kennedy. She’s a baby, Everett, not a time bomb. She will poop, spit up, drool, put disgusting things in her mouth and likely wake up several times a night.”
“You make it sound like such fun.” He sat up straighter. “I need to talk to you about something other than Kennedy’s bodily functions.”
“Ah.” She sat down next to him. “Is this about why you disappeared today?”
Now it was here, she realized how much she had been dreading this moment. It wasn’t that she believed caring for Kennedy had suddenly catapulted her into a fairy tale. Her early life had convinced her there were no such things as magic wands, golden coaches and glass slippers. And if Prince Charming existed? Well, he’d chosen a life in the FBI, and she was the anxiety-filled princess who couldn’t deal with that.
No, she was realistic enough to know that bringing up a baby would be hard. But she’d have liked more than a few hours to adjust to the idea before things got weird.
He nodded. “A delivery came. It was a Christmas gift for Kennedy.”
She frowned, her brain trying to make sense of what he was saying. “How could anyone have known where she was?”
“Exactly.”
Her first instinct was to rush into the bedroom, wrap Kennedy in a blanket and dash out into the night with her. But where could she take her that would be safer than right here with Everett? He was experienced at protecting people who were at risk. For the first time ever, she saw his job as a blessing instead of a curse.
“Is she in danger?”
“I couldn’t find out who sent it.” He reached across the space between them and covered her hand with his. “I won’t let anything hurt her—or you, Lyss.”
The old term of endearment slipped so naturally from his lips she wasn’t sure he even noticed it. From her perspective, it was soothing. And, goodness, she would take all the comfort she could get right now.
“Do you know have any idea who could have sent it?”
“I don’t have enough information to start speculating.” She sensed he was holding something back. Did he have a suspect in mind? Was there even anything to be suspicious of at this point? She figured he would give her any information she needed to keep Kennedy safe.
“It could have been innocent,” he said.
“You don’t think that.” She turned her head to look at him. His expression was grim.
“No, I don’t.” He heaved a sigh. “When Sean and Delilah died, Georgia made it clear she thought they had been murdered. She also said she wanted to take care of Kennedy.”
“Oh.” She looked down at her hands. “But you said she was in jail because she broke her bail conditions. How could she send the gift if she’s behind bars?”
“I don’t know. But it makes me want to know more about the way Sean and Delilah died.”
Chapter 4 (#u2e305b02-291d-5923-9577-ad86fd96c323)
Everett had always been a light sleeper. He had trouble drifting into slumber and struggled to get back to sleep if he woke in the night. Things had gotten worse over the last few years, and he’d tried every tip and gadget that came his way. Recently, he’d found a combination of an eye mask, headphones and white noise playing on his phone worked best. It was awkward going to bed wired up, but at least he felt human in the mornings.
Even with his support system in place, he lay awake for several hours after his conversation with Alyssa. There were so many thoughts competing for his attention, it would be surprising if he ever slept again.
The first, and most important thing, was that he’d become a dad. It was not the way he’d always pictured it would happen, but he was determined to make the best of it. For Sean, for Kennedy and for this new little family. It was exciting, scary and intense. And he still couldn’t quite believe it was happening. He couldn’t help wondering how Kennedy would fit into his life. Was it really possible to love someone else’s child? He had made a commitment to care for Sean’s daughter and protect her, but would he ever care for her the way he would if she had been his own? It wasn’t important. If the love didn’t come, he would make sure Kennedy never knew.
He just wished he didn’t have to get to know her alongside the mystery surrounding her parents’ deaths. His thoughts turned to the call from Casey telling him Sean had killed himself. Even though it had been four years since they’d spoken, Everett’s first reaction had been guilt. Should he have known? Could he have done something to prevent it?
Next came disbelief. Not Sean. Not his energetic, arrogant, laugh-in-the-face-of-danger ex-friend. And that was what stayed with him. Maybe everyone felt that way, but Sean had always believed he was invincible. He’d never had a moment’s self-doubt in his life. But Sean’s open disapproval of Georgia’s relationship with Casey had ended up with his brother heartbroken at the altar.
You hadn’t seen him in four years. A man can change a lot in that time.
Except…Everett had seen him. He’d headed the FBI team who had chased down the cattle rustlers. After not speaking to him in years, Sean’s first words had been a quiet, mocking whisper when Everett had read him his rights.
“I’m going to enjoy making you look dumb in court, Colton.” The familiar gleam in his old friend’s eye said it all. Sean hadn’t changed a bit. Even though it was malicious, he saw this as an extension of the duct-tape and peanut-butter games. Sean played to win, and he was looking forward to a new challenge.
Of course, Everett accepted that no one ever knew for sure what was going on inside another person’s life, or head. But when his focus shifted from Pierce Tostig’s murder to the Dodds’ deaths, his concerns became professional as well as personal. The suicide note was just part of the problem. There were too many other things that didn’t add up.
Even if he allowed himself to picture Sean committing suicide, he could not accept that the man he had once called his friend would have killed his wife. With a new baby to care for, it was likely she’d have faced a reduced charge and might even have escaped a custodial sentence.
Sean and Delilah were two of a kind, each drawn to the other’s reckless streak. They had a six-month-old baby whom they both clearly loved. Their criminal activities hadn’t halted when Kennedy came along but they had gone to the trouble of enlisting a neighbor to help with the babysitting. Even if he’d thought of taking Delilah’s life, would Sean really have taken the drastic step of depriving Kennedy of both parents? Yes, she had an aunt, but would Sean have considered Georgia a suitable person to care for his child? Everett doubted it. It came back to that same question. If his mind had been disturbed, who knew what his reasoning might be?
The night they died, there were signs at their house of a disturbance. It appeared that the couple had been eating at the kitchen table when chairs were overturned and plates tipped onto the floor. There were marks suggesting someone had been dragged along the gravel drive between the house and the garage.
Had Sean forced Delilah out the door and into the car against her will? That suggested an impulsiveness at odds with a written suicide note. As did driving his vehicle full-speed at a wall. Death wasn’t guaranteed, and Sean was nothing if not precise. If he had wanted to die, he had a safe full of guns that would have been a safer bet.
Thank goodness Kennedy had been staying with Georgia that night…
It was the first time in his life Everett had been thankful for Georgia Dodd, the woman who had almost been his sister-in-law. When they were kids, Sean’s little sister had been trouble. As an adult, she had embraced rather than outgrown the label. When she’d gotten engaged to his twin, Everett had done his best to put aside his misgivings. Dumping Casey at the altar had sealed his dislike for her. Sean might have urged her to do it, but Georgia had a mind of her own. The decision to walk had been hers.
She was Kennedy’s only surviving close relative. She was behind bars and, if she was found guilty, that was where she would stay. It was one more thing he would have to deal with now his life had taken this new, unforeseen turn. In one day.
But the most painful twist the last twenty-four hours had thrown at him was bringing Alyssa back into his life. And he didn’t know how to deal with that.
When they broke up, he’d learned the hard way that heartache really did hurt as much as people said. He’d lost count of the number of times he’d picked up his cell phone and gazed at her number on the screen, rehearsing what he was going to say. But he’d known there were no words to make it right. The damage had been done before they met.
For Alyssa, it had happened way back when a random drunk stabbed her dad. Casey would say that, in Everett’s case, it had been more recent, dating back to his brief stint in the world of corporate law. Did that make it harder to deal with?
I’ll leave the amateur psychoanalysis to my brother.
Friends told him the pain of a breakup got better with time. It didn’t. He just found ways to push aside the ache of missing her. Instead of staring at her picture like a man dying of thirst would stare at an out-of-reach bottle of water, he threw himself into his work, went for long runs, worked out and took aimless drives with his music turned up loud to tune out the memories.
He’d even tried dating again. If possible, that had made him miss her more. After a few attempts, he’d given up. It was unfair to the other women, who didn’t know they would never be enough for him because they weren’t Alyssa.
Four years had passed, and he still thought about her every day. She was imprinted on his heart. Now she was in the next room…
A sound penetrated his sleep defenses. It was a series of squawks followed by a child’s distressed sobbing. Everett was on his feet, with wires trailing, and ran into the master bedroom.
“What’s going on? Is she okay?”
Alyssa was out of bed and pacing the floor with Kennedy in her arms. The dim glow from the night-light next to the bed shone on the baby’s tearstained, red cheeks.
“I’ve tried everything I can think of to settle her,” Alyssa said. “She started whimpering a little, so I gave her some formula. Her diaper is clean and dry, so that’s not the problem. Her body temperature is fine. She likes being rocked, so I tried that. I think she may be cutting a tooth and her gums are sore.”
“What can we do about that?” Under Alyssa’s interested gaze, he removed his sleep aids as he spoke. She’d never seen him wired up. The sleep problems had gotten worse since the breakup.
“We can give her an infant pain reliever, but I didn’t see any in the boxes I unpacked.”
“There’s a twenty-four-hour drugstore a couple of blocks away. I’ll head over there.”
“See if they have any teething toys for her to chew on.” Alyssa held up a reddened thumb. “I’m running out of fingers for her to bite.”
Going back to his own room, he threw a jacket over the sweatpants and T-shirt he’d worn to bed and pulled on his socks and boots. He grabbed his car keys and cell phone, then headed out into the cool night air.
Cactus Creek was not a party town, and, since it was after midnight, most businesses on Main Street had closed their doors several hours earlier. It was unusual to see anyone around at this time of night, so as he started down the steps, Everett’s attention was caught by a vehicle parked directly opposite from his apartment.
The single occupant hunkered down in the driver’s seat, woolen beanie hat pulled down low and scarf wrapped around the lower part of the face. Everett had worked enough stakeouts to know what he was looking at. It was amateurish, but unmistakable. There was only one place in plain view. Everett’s apartment was at the top of the steps. The guy was watching his front door.
Going down the stairs two at a time, he approached the vehicle at a run, cell phone in hand as he snapped a picture of the license plate. Catching sight of him, and anticipating his intention, the driver gunned the engine into life, turning on the main beams at the same time. Caught in the glare of the lights, Everett threw up an arm to shield his eyes.
As the car’s tires squealed, he had a split second in which to process what was happening. Instead of heading out of the parking lot, the driver had hit the gas and was speeding straight toward him. Diving to one side, Everett managed to roll into the space under the steps just as the car bounced off the curb where he had been standing.
Like cluster bombs exploding inside his skull, his brain fired off a series of instructions. This guy had signaled his intentions, and they weren’t good. A stakeout was bad enough. Taking the opportunity to try to kill a federal agent took the situation to a whole other level.
Everett was currently pinned in position. If he moved from his place of security, he risked being mowed down. If he stayed where he was, Alyssa and Kennedy could be in danger.
Hunkering down in the darkness, he was preparing to call Casey when the car engine started revving up again. Risking a quick glance out at the parking lot, he was in time to see the vehicle make a 180-degree turn before it bumped across a flower bed and screeched out onto the road.
Uncurling his long legs from their cramped position, Everett exited his hiding place. As he headed toward his car, he made a mental to-do list.
Get Kennedy her teething meds, send Casey the picture he’d taken of that vehicle…and add some agility training exercises to his workout regime.
Why was Everett taking so long? As soon as the thought hit, Alyssa groaned out loud. It was starting again. She had been in his company for less than twenty-four hours and already the old anxieties were resurfacing.
This time, she had to find a way around her fears. Not because they were together. But because of this new commitment. For Kennedy’s sake, she couldn’t freak out every time he was gone. She couldn’t live on a knife edge forever, and she wasn’t prepared to pass on her insecurities to a helpless little girl.
“There must be a way. Other people do this.” She drew Kennedy closer, and the baby hitched her breath in a tired sob as she tucked her head into Alyssa’s neck. “How about I try to get you to take a sip of cold water while we’re waiting?”
Although more water dribbled onto Kennedy’s chin than into her mouth, the cool liquid soothed her. By the time Everett returned, her tears had subsided and she was almost asleep with her head on Alyssa’s shoulder.
“Are you limping?” As soon as the words left her lips, Alyssa wished them unsaid. So much for her vow—made minutes earlier—to overcome her worry. Instead of toughening up, she was coming across as whiny and needy.
Everett appeared not to notice. “How about we settle this little one, then I’ll tell you all about it?”
If the fact that there was an “it” didn’t escape her attention, neither did the reassuring smile in his eyes. He was here and, for now, that was enough to make her feel safe and warm.
It wasn’t enough last time…
She shrugged away the thought. Everything had changed when Kennedy came along. Maybe she should get that made into a lapel pin?
The painkiller syrup came with a small, needle-free syringe. Having filled it to the required dose, Alyssa tilted Kennedy’s head and put the syringe into her mouth, aiming for the back corner.
Everett watched the maneuver with concern. “Won’t she choke when that goes down her throat?”
“If I pointed it directly down her throat she might gag. But I’m going to release it slowly into the back of her mouth.” Alyssa pressed the stopper gently as she spoke. “It’s no good putting into the front of her mouth. She’d simply push the medicine back out with her tongue.”
