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“This way, you won’t have to look it up.”
He felt awkward now, but Olivia didn’t seem to be suffering any such problems. She gave him a small salute.
“I’ll be going home now. It’s getting late, and I do have quite a bit to think over.”
“I’ll be a good father, Olivia.” He hadn’t meant to say that. He hadn’t planned on trying to convince her what a good person he was. But he wanted the baby so badly, now, before he got any older, before he was left all alone in the world.
Again, she didn’t mock him.
“I never doubted it.” She looked almost sad, which didn’t make any sense. “Tomorrow at seven, Tony.” And then she was gone.
CHAPTER TWO
OLIVIA LAY IN BED that night, despising herself. She was a fraud and a manipulator and the worst kind of person for taking advantage of another. Tony had no idea the type of woman he was dealing with.
She’d known since she was sixteen that she would never have children. For her, it was physically impossible.
In the hospital, only hours before Olivia’s mother had slipped away, she had explained about the condition that robbed her daughter of that particular function. Olivia wasn’t a whole woman, could never lead a whole life. Having children was as beyond her as it was for Tony. And so she’d made her business her life. It was the only life she’d ever have.
Swallowing hard, Olivia felt the sting of tears as she recalled going to the hospital as a very young girl, her belly cramping painfully, the bleeding. It had been horrible, being examined by a male doctor. Beyond the pain, she’d felt violated and mortified. And then there were the days after when her mother and father had been so quiet, so withdrawn. She hated hospitals now, and she wouldn’t go to the doctor unless it was absolutely necessary.
She thought she’d successfully put the past behind her, that she’d buried the wishes that couldn’t come true. But now, with Tony’s proposition, they all came flooding back. She wanted to be loved, to have children, to be desired by a special man who would accept her as a sensual woman.
She couldn’t do anything about the first two wishes, but the third was a possibility.
It was rumored that Tony was an exceptional lover. She couldn’t deny that the information had given her a few private fantasies of her own. After all, despite everything, she was still a woman, and on occasion, she’d seen him strictly as a man. But intimacy was something she’d neither expected nor wanted from Tony.
Until she’d heard his plan.
And now it was all she could think about. Tony obviously admired her, and that was something. It wasn’t love, but it was a far cry from a totally detached sexual experience. She cared about Tony, thought he was a beautiful person and a very sexy man. And he wanted her as the mother of his child.
That was a precious gift all on its own, the highest of compliments.
Tony didn’t have to know that she’d never be able to conceive a child, that she was infertile. She could insist on doing things the “natural” way, allow him to try his manly best for a couple of weeks, then confess it wasn’t happening. He’d go on his way, none the wiser, find another woman, and have his baby by his designated time. She had not a single doubt of his eventual success. There were numerous women out there who would be more than willing to oblige him.
But he’d approached her, and she couldn’t quite send him on his way. Not yet. Hearing him discuss his sperm in such a casual way, and talk of impregnating her as if he was referring to buying her coffee, had been somehow very arousing. Long dormant feelings had seemed to swell without her consent, and when she’d pictured him “supplying” his sperm, pictured the process necessary to such a deed, she’d felt a sexual heat at the image, along with an emotional tenderness that he wanted a child so badly. Together, the two feelings had conspired against her better sense.
She’d read every article she could ever find on him, and they were numerous. She’d tried to follow in his footsteps, as impossible as that seemed, because he was too dynamic, too overwhelming. And also, he loved his family, when she didn’t even have a family to claim.
He was a good man, in every sense of the word. And she planned to corrupt him for her own purposes.
She was a fraud, but she wouldn’t actually be hurting anyone. Other than herself.
IT HAD PROVED to be a long night and an even longer day. By seven o’clock, Olivia was so nervous her heart threatened to beat right out of her chest. When her phone rang, a good three minutes after seven, she jumped a foot. She forced herself to wait through four rings, feeling juvenile but determined not to look overanxious, and then she answered. “Hello?”
“Olivia? It’s Tony.”
Just that, nothing more. She cleared her throat. “Hello.” Her voice squeaked, but she didn’t hang up. She could do this; she would grab the opportunity. But of course, she wouldn’t accept anything from him, other than the additional shop he’d already agreed to. She would suffer no guilt for taking monetary advantage of him. She would only use his body, and only for a brief time.
“Hi.” There was a long pause. “Have you made up your mind?”
She bit her lip, then took a deep breath. “I have. But I…I have a few stipulations I’d like to discuss.”
She heard his indrawn breath. “Does that mean you’ll do it?”
“Yes. But with a few—”
“I heard you. A few stipulations. Whatever it is, it’s yours!”
His joy was impossible to ignore. The man was thrilled to be getting what he believed would eventually be his baby. Olivia swallowed her guilt and girded herself. “You probably ought to know what I want before you agree to it.”
“I can afford whatever it is. I know you’re not a greedy woman. You won’t leave me bankrupt.”
“I want to forget the doctor.”
Deathly quiet. “Excuse me?”
Olivia knew she had thrown that out there awfully quick, but if she hadn’t, she might never have said it at all. “I don’t want to go through a doctor. I want…I want to do things naturally.”
“Naturally?”
He sounded completely stupefied, and she nearly growled in frustration. “Yes, dammit! As in you and me, together, the way nature intended.”
Not a single sound now. “Tony?”
“I’m here.”
Olivia waited. Strangely enough, she could hear Tony trying to sort his thoughts as clearly as she could hear her own heart pounding.
Finally he said, “Would you mind telling me why?”
Olivia shook her head, realized how stupid that was and closed her eyes. “Of course not. I just…”
“No, wait. This isn’t a conversation for the phone. Are you busy?”
“Now?”
“Yes, now. Believe me, I don’t want to have to sleep on this without understanding.”
“Of course not.” Olivia looked around her apartment, hoping for inspiration, but found only the same quiet environment that always surrounded her. “I could meet you somewhere.”
“No, I’ll pick you up. I know where you live. It’s—”
“It’s in your records.”
“Yes. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
The phone clicked in her ear, and to Olivia it sounded like the beginning of a drumroll. Oh boy, too late to change her mind now. Then, because she had no idea how far away Tony was or how soon he would arrive, she rushed from the room to find something appropriate to wear.
When she reached her closet, she stopped, feeling ridiculous. What in the world would be considered proper dress for telling a man you’d agree to have his baby, but only if he’d pleasure you in the bargain?
Especially when you knew you were cheating him, and he wouldn’t get a damn thing out of the deal, least of all, what he really wanted. A baby.
TONY STARED AT HER apartment door, started to knock, then lowered his hand. Dammit all, why couldn’t women ever do anything the simple way? He’d offered Olivia a straightforward, up-front deal, and she’d had to go and muddy the waters by asking that he actually attend her. Not that it would be a hardship, but he didn’t want to get involved. He’d made his plans and he didn’t want to deviate from them.
Still, Olivia Anderson—business barracuda and proprietor of two sensual, sexy lingerie shops—wanted to make love with him.
Who would have ever thought she’d ask for such a thing? She was always an enigma, a mix of styles and personalities, but even so, this development had thrown him for a loop. He’d sometimes wondered, when he’d been in her shop and seen the very stimulating garments she carried, if she ever wore any of those little bits of nothing, if she spoiled her body with silks and lace. It hadn’t seemed likely. But now…
She had him totally confused, and he didn’t like it one bit. He also didn’t want to have to start looking for a new mother. Time was running out. He wasn’t getting any younger, and if he didn’t act soon, he’d be past the age of thirty-five when he brought his baby home.
No. He’d chosen her, dammit, and he wouldn’t give up without at least trying to reason with her.
He ran a hand through his hair, then knocked sharply on the door. Immediately three doors opened. Olivia and two neighbors stared at him, the latter with narrowed eyes and curious expressions. Just what he needed, an engrossed audience.
Olivia tried for a smile, but it wasn’t her best effort. “Come on inside.”
“No.” He shook his head, glaring at the neighbors. An elderly couple now stood at one door, and a younger woman with curlers in her hair at the other; they glared right back at him. Tony turned his gaze back to Olivia. “Let’s go for a drive instead.”
Olivia hesitated, seemingly oblivious to the onlookers, then finally said, “All right. Just let me grab my jacket.”
Tony cursed under his breath. This was exactly what he’d wanted to avoid. He didn’t need anyone speculating on his relationship with Olivia, because he’d never intended to have a relationship with her. In his simple, uncomplicated, male-inspired plan, he would have given her the address of the doctor and then heard from her later to learn if she’d conceived. He certainly hadn’t intended to stand in her doorway providing entertainment to the masses. Not that three people could be considered a mass, but with their eyes glued to him, he felt very uncomfortable.
Olivia finally produced herself. She stepped outside the door, turned to make certain it was locked, then dropped her keys into her pocket. “I’m ready.”
Then, as if on cue, she turned to the neighbors and nodded to each one in turn. “Hello, Hilda, Leroy, Emma. This is Tony Austin. Hopefully I’ll be opening another of my shops in his hotel chain. Isn’t that marvelous?”
Everyone nodded, their suspicions visibly dissipating and en masse they began to sing Olivia’s praises. Tony did his best to make an exit, but he had to spend several minutes nodding in agreement before he could leave.
As they walked out of the building onto the street, he said, “That’s the last time for that.”
“What?”
“Meeting at your apartment. It gives rise to too much speculation. If we’re not careful, we’ll have that scandal yet.”
He opened the door to his car for Olivia, but she didn’t get in. “Does that mean you intend to meet with me again? You will agree with my terms?”
Pushy woman. Why had he never realized before just how pushy she could be? Savvy was one thing, pushy was another. He summoned his most noncommittal tone. “We’ll see.” He practically tossed her into the passenger seat, before going around to his own side.
“There’s really not a whole lot to see, Tony. I don’t like the idea of the clinical approach, that’s all. If you can’t see your way clear to actually touch me, then there’s nothing to talk about.”
He clenched his hands on the steering wheel. He clenched his teeth. He even clenched his thighs, but still, her words affected him. Touch her? He’d like to touch her all right—now, this very minute, with his hands, his mouth, his entire body. But he wouldn’t. Oh, no. Touching was bad. Touching would only lead to more touching, and then he’d be in over his head and…
“Tony?”
“How about doing me a favor, Olivia? How about keeping your thoughts to yourself for a few minutes until we get off the road and then we’ll discuss your…terms.”
“All right.”
She sounded too damn agreeable and that rankled, but at least she kept her words behind her teeth for all of five minutes, giving him a blessed chance to gain control of his libido. Then she asked in a very tentative voice, “Have you considered the possibility that I won’t conceive? After all, there’s no guarantee that I’ll prove to be…fertile ground for you to…plant your seed. How much time are you willing to devote to trying to get me pregnant?”
Fertile ground? Plant his seed? Tony’s five minutes of calm were suddenly shot to hell. How was it such bland, ridiculous terms sounded sexier than the most erotic whispered words he’d ever heard? Perhaps it was because of the envisioned result. He’d never before considered a woman carrying his child, and that must be the reason every word out of her mouth aroused him to the point of pain.
He cleared his throat and kept his gaze steady on the darkened road. “The doctor mentioned that several attempts may be necessary before the insemination takes.”
“But doing it naturally? Is there a projected time span on that?”
He felt strangled. “I never actually asked him that.”
“Perhaps you should.”
Out of sheer necessity, he pulled the car off the main street and onto a small dirt road that led to a dead end. When Tony was younger, he and his brother had come here to make out with girls. In those days there was a wide cornfield, but it had been replaced by a small park with a street lamp. Obviously things had changed, but the premise was the same. Isolation.
Despite the fact that he was sweating, he left the car running, for it was a cold night in early November. He killed the lights, though, giving himself some illusionary concealment. When he turned to face her, he already had his mouth open to start his argument, but he was brought up short by the picture she presented.
Moonlight poured over her, revealing the sheen of dark hair, the shape of her ears, her high arched brows. Her eyelashes left long feathery shadows on her cheeks and shielded her eyes from his gaze. Her hands were folded in her lap. She appeared somehow very unsure of herself…vulnerable. It wasn’t a look he was used to, not from her. She lifted her gaze to his face, and once again he felt that deep frustration.
It wasn’t that Olivia was beautiful. She was by far the most elegant woman he’d ever known, but she wasn’t classically beautiful. He had dated more attractive women, made love to them, had long-standing affairs with them that had left him numb. But Olivia was the only woman whose personality, intelligence and disposition were attractive enough to entice him into asking her to carry his child. That was something. More than something, actually, when you figured it was usually looks that drew a man first, and the other, more important features of a woman that kept him drawn.
When he remained quiet, she said, “I know what I’m asking seems absurd. After all, you could have any woman you want, and after knowing you for so long, it’s obvious you don’t particularly want me. That’s okay, because up until you mentioned your plan, I hadn’t really thought about wanting you, either.
“But you see, I’ve made my career everything.” Her hands twisted in her lap and her voice shook. “Just as you don’t want any involvements now, neither do I. That’s why the idea seems so perfect. I haven’t taken the time or the effort to get to know very many men, and almost never on an intimate level. These days, only an idiot would indulge in casual sex. But starting a relationship isn’t something I want, either. So I thought, maybe we could both get what we wanted.”
Tony searched her face, feeling dumbfounded. Surely she wasn’t suggesting what he thought she was. “I want a baby. What is it you want, Olivia?”
She turned her head away from him and looked out the window. Sounding so unlike herself, she whispered in a small voice, “I want a wild, hot, never-to-be-forgotten affair. For two weeks. If during that time I conceive, the baby will become yours, and we’ll go on with the rest of your plans. If I don’t conceive, I’ll be on my way and you can find another woman who, hopefully, will prove more fertile. You won’t owe me a thing. In fact, I’ll consider myself well paid.”
“Well paid? As in sex? You make yourself sound like a…”
“Like a woman who’s desperate? I suppose I am.” She finally met his gaze, her eyes huge and so very dark in the dim light. “I want to know what it’s like to be with a man. But it has to be a man I trust, both with my safety and my health. I’m afraid you fit that bill.”
The way she’d worded that had him frowning. “Olivia, you’re not a virgin, are you?”
“No, but close.” She held up two slim fingers.
“You’ve had sex with two different men?”
“No, I’ve had sex twice. With the same man, or boy rather. Neither time necessarily inspired an encore, but the second time I allowed myself to be convinced. I suppose I was hoping he’d improved from the week before, but he hadn’t.”
Tony found himself smiling. Olivia wanted to have sex with him, but she planned to keep a score card? “What did he do that was so wrong?”
“I’m not certain I know what was wrong, since I haven’t yet experienced it right, but we were both practically fully clothed, cramped into the backseat of his car, and he grunted a lot. And by a lot, I mean for all of about three minutes. Continuously.”
“Well…” Tony suppressed a laugh and tried to look serious. “I suppose I can improve on that, anyway.”
“I should certainly hope so.”
Tony couldn’t help but chuckle at her serious tone. “I can’t recall ever having a woman come right out and ask me to perform to her satisfaction. You’re downright scary, do you know that?”
