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“It bothers you?” he asked. “Kissing me, I mean? Is that why you’re over there strangling yourself?”
“No—”
“Sure looked bothered to me.”
“I didn’t expect to discuss it over dinner!”
He ignored that. “I’m wondering,” he said, “if I mentioned how bad I want to get you naked, would you keel right over?”
Throwing the slice of pizza at him seemed like a good idea. Instead she put it back on her plate. Should she leave? Show disdain? Embarrassment?
She decided on a dose of honesty instead. “You’ll never see me naked.”
“No?” As if only mildly curious, he asked, “Why not?”
“Because I won’t allow it.”
His eyes narrowed—and his gaze went to her chest. “Too shy, huh?”
She sat back in her seat. “You don’t talk like a man who ever hopes to be successful. You’re so mocking, it’s almost an insult.”
“Don’t mean to be.” He put another gigantic slice of pizza onto his plate. “Truth is, Sue, you confound me.”
“Confound you?”
She had to wait while he devoured half the pizza. After he wiped his mouth with a napkin, he crossed his arms over the table. “You’re as interested as I am. I wasn’t the only one on the couch who wanted more.”
Since he waited, she said, “No.” She’d probably been far needier than he was. For certain, she’d been celibate longer.
“So why are you so skittish? Why the mixed messages?”
Shoot. She had been pretty inconsistent. But how could she possibly explain the past that held her back, the fears that dictated she show discretion in all things?
He saved her by reaching for her hand. “You can tell me, you know.”
No, she most definitely could not. She eyed him warily. “Tell you what?”
“If someone hurt you. If you’re just inexperienced. If you’re modest or afraid or…whatever the problem might be.”
All that? What exactly did he think? That she’d lived in a convent? That she’d been a victim of abuse? For certain she couldn’t tell him any part of the truth. Even with the passing of time, even with Morton Andrews’s club, Checkers, being in another county—distant enough that they wouldn’t run into him, close enough that Rowdy could keep tabs on him—the truth would be risky.
But she had to say something, so she looked at his big hand holding hers. “I am shy. And I am modest.” A really good liar, too.
“But you want me.”
Did she ever. Whether she should or not, whether it was wise or not.
“Sue? Whatever you tell me, it’s okay. I’m not going to start rushing you.”
Baloney. That’s all he’d done so far. She met his gaze. “Yes.”
It took several heartbeats before he repeated, “Yes…what?”
“I want you.” Let him deal with that. “Your interest has been flattering,” she added, trying to sound a little more uncertain. “But I’m not comfortable with anyone seeing me.”
His sharpened attention moved over her. “Naked, you mean?”
“Yes, that’s what I mean.”
A heated stillness fell over him. “You don’t have anything I haven’t already seen, right?”
She almost choked again. He had no idea the surprises she kept hidden. “I’m not disfigured, if that’s what you’re asking.”
“No, I wasn’t. Just making a point, that’s all. And if modesty is the only problem—”
“It’s not.” No, there were a million reasons why she shouldn’t get too involved with him, physically or otherwise.
And yet, here she sat. Having pizza. Talking.
After allowing him to kiss her into oblivion and grope her on the sofa. She put her head in her hands and fought off a groan.
Pushing his chair back from the table, his dinner forgotten, he concentrated on her. “What else?”
Because it felt as if he might pounce on her at any moment despite his promise not to rush her, Pepper left her chair and stood behind it. Judging by the look on his face, he saw it as a defensive move. She knew it was more a matter of control: around him, she had none.
Slowly, he stood.
Before he took a step toward her—and before she pounced on him—she said, “I barely know you.”
“Okay.” He held out his arms. “I’m an open book. What do you want to know?”
Why do you want me so badly? No, she couldn’t ask him anything that blunt. “Everything, I guess.”
“Will you sit down and finish eating while I give you a verbal resume?”
Why not? She was still hungry, the pizza still hot. “Okay.” Not looking at him, she took her seat and again bit into her pizza.
“Long or short version?”
Everything, in minute detail. She shook her head. “I don’t mean to pry exactly—”
“Long it is.” He smiled, waited until she got a mouthful, then said, “Never been married, but was engaged once. Have a degree in business, but haven’t used it because I enjoy the freedom of construction more. I’ve been all over the country, but prefer the Midwest. I’m thirty-two, love watching all sports and enjoy playing softball or football. I detest shopping of any kind, even for groceries, but I’m a fair cook when forced to it. I really like animals, but don’t have any because, well, living in a place like this, it wouldn’t be fair to the animal, right? Dogs especially deserve a big backyard. In fact, now that I’m thinking about it, I don’t really trust anyone who doesn’t like animals, so do you?”
It took Pepper a moment to realize he’d slipped a question in there. She swallowed down her bite and nodded. “Yes, but for the same reasons you just gave—” and many more “—I don’t have any pets, either.” Someday, in her fantasy future, she’d love to have pets, lots of them. Kids, too…no, she wouldn’t, couldn’t think that way.
It’d only depress her.
“So we have that in common,” Logan said. “My folks have an ancient German shepherd that loves to swim. I think it’s easier for him than running, less stress on his hips.”
Slipping in her own question, she asked, “Why didn’t you marry?”
“Haven’t met the right woman, I guess. I want to someday.” He gestured. “You know, home, hearth, holidays with two kids, a cat and a dog. All that.”
“You were engaged?” she prompted.
“Yeah, for over a year.” He ran a hand through his hair. “It was all good until she decided I had to take a job with her daddy, and her daddy was a grade-A prick, so…” He shrugged. “Couldn’t work it out.”
That sounded like the absolute truth, but could that really be the whole story? “You don’t sound particularly heartbroken over it.”
His expression warmed. Belatedly, she decided that prim and proper Sue Meeks should have reacted some to his language. But, oh, well. Too late now.
“Funny thing, that. I never was.” Done eating, he slouched back in his chair and cradled his beer on his midsection. “I mean, I was pissed. Maybe even a little…” He searched for a word and settled on, “Disappointed. But I guess I never really loved her, not the way you should love someone if you’re going to spend a lifetime together.”
“How long ago was that?”
“Few years.” He gave her a searching look. “What about you? Ever been serious about anyone?”
“No.”
Because she’d answered so quickly, he laughed. “Okay.” He nodded at her empty plate. “All done?”
Thrown by the change in topic, she looked at her plate and was surprised that she’d eaten so much. “Yes, thank you.”
“So.” He stood and carried the dishes to the sink. “What now?”
Bemused, she watched as he rinsed each plate, loaded them in the dishwasher and did a general cleaning of their dinner mess.
By the time he finished, no sign of dinner remained. “You’re a lot tidier than I am.”
“No offense, but I’m thinking a lot of people are probably tidier than you.”
“It’s true.” She didn’t really get into the whole domestic routine. She let out a sigh. “My place isn’t really dirty or anything, but it is cluttered.” She wrinkled her nose. “I don’t like to fuss.”
“Good. Fussy women are annoying.”
Distant thunder rumbled, and they both looked toward the balcony. The bright evening sunshine had faded beneath thick gray clouds that darkened the sky. A troubled breeze carried in cooler air.
“Don’t get me wrong,” Logan said, “but this is the weirdest date I’ve ever had.”
That brought her back around to face him. “It wasn’t a date!”
“Sure it was.” Mood teasing, he came closer. “A little necking, dinner and conversation, getting to know each other.”
Oh, God. Maybe it was a date.
“Usually doesn’t happen in that order, and I can’t recall ever talking marriage on a first date.”
“You brought it up!”
“To appease your curiosity.” A light patter of rain danced over the patio doors. “But it wasn’t bad for our first. Was it?”
Not bad at all. In fact, it was the first time in ages that she’d forgotten, for just a little while, how much her life had changed. “No, I suppose it—”
Bright lightning splintered the sky, chased by a deafening crack of thunder that reverberated in the floor beneath their feet.
She said, “Wow.” And the electricity died.
It needed only this.
The combination of no lights and black sky left the apartment cast in deep mysterious shadows.
Logan walked to the patio doors just as the storm hit in earnest, pounding the earth with a deluge of rain. It blew in against his bare chest, dampening his skin, his hair and the front of those well-worn jeans.
He shut his doors and, after swiping off his face, crossed the floor to get the kitchen window, too.
Because she stood there in a lustful daze, he prompted her. “What about your windows? They open?”
How had she forgotten that? “Damn it,” she said, and bolted back to her own apartment. She didn’t want Logan to follow her, but she didn’t take the time to tell him not to. The way the rain blew in, everything she owned would be soaked in under a minute.
She got the balcony doors closed while he shut the kitchen window for her. She darted into the bathroom to get that small window, and Logan…went into her bedroom.
No, no, no.
Face soaked, shirt and shoes wet, she waited, but he didn’t come back out. Knowing proximity could get the best of her, she nonetheless stepped into the bedroom behind him. He had his back to her, eyeing her treadmill.
“Logan?”
When he turned, she saw his jeans clinging to his body, his chest hair darker with the rain, his nipples tight from the chill.
Her mouth went dry.
“Sorry.” He ran a hand over his face and pushed back his hair. “It was coming in pretty good. Your floor’s wet, and so is the bottom of your bed.”
She stayed by the door, her thoughts rioting with explicit images of him naked, the things he’d do, the things she wanted to do to him.
A sudden shift in the air, in his mood, sent a thread of excited alarm up her spine.
He took a step toward her. “What about you, Sue?”
Not knowing what he asked, she shook her head in confusion.
“It’s too damn dark for me to tell,” he whispered, coming closer. In a husky, suggestive tone, he said, “I’m betting you’re wet, too.”
So many ways she wanted to reply—all of them dangerous.
She couldn’t think when she looked at him, so she turned her back and tried to order herself to caution.
“Thank you for the help.” It was an obvious hint for him to go, but at the same time, she had that image of him standing there, at the foot of her unmade bed. Tall, bare-chested, sexy as sin…
