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At least my present arrangement allowed me to do whatever I wanted with whoever I chose. It kept things simple.
‘What about you?’ I asked, as he held open the taxi door so I could climb inside.
An enigmatic grin spread across his face. ‘One man is plenty.’
Chapter Two (#ulink_876f6bcc-0645-55a6-bc7a-8a64285f8357)
We weren’t really supposed to carry personal phones at work, but I’d accidentally left mine in my pocket earlier, so when it bleeped as I worked on tidying up the jewellery stand, I took it out and answered.
‘Hello.’
‘Lyssa?’
I knew his voice at once. ‘Victor?’ I clutched the phone so tight to my ear it began to ache. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. How had he got my number? Why had he called? ‘I wasn’t expecting to hear from you?’
‘Your friend Sam gave me your number. She wasn’t happy about it, so I had to twist her arm. I don’t think she likes me anymore.’
‘Oh!’ A nervous giggle escaped my mouth. I could guess what sort of persuasion he’d used. ‘But you wouldn’t really have exposed her,’ I said, as I ducked out of sight behind one of the display racks.
It was Victor’s turn to laugh. ‘As what – a woman with a sex life? Come on, I’m equally, if not more, guilty of public lewdness than she is.’
‘You didn’t take any clothes off,’ I reminded him. He hadn’t done anything besides watch, much to my chagrin. I wanted to ask him why, but the moment didn’t feel right. I was too curious to learn why he’d phoned to risk him hanging up.
‘You know –’ I could practically imagine him ticking one of his long elegant fingers at me ‘– I’m not sure that would weigh much in my defence, given the view from where I was standing.’
‘My view was pretty good too.’
‘Was it?’
Damn, now I was blushing. I held my breath, waiting to hear why he’d called.
‘Can we meet?’ he asked.
Yes! Yes, we most certainly could. ‘When?’ I gasped, so urgently I probably sounded like a slavering beast.
‘How about tonight?’
Argh! It was Friday. I already had arrangements for tonight. I danced about from one foot to the other. To anyone walking past I probably looked like a toddler desperate for a pee. Ultimately though, there was only one answer I could give, despite how little I wanted to give it. ‘I’m sorry, Victor. I can’t. I’d love to. It’s just I have something on.’
‘You mean you’re seeing someone else.’
It was a standing arrangement that I met the guys on a Friday night. We had fun. We got inventive. This evening’s entertainment had been planned for weeks. ‘We’re playing laser tag. Nathan’s picking me up.’
‘Excuse me?’ His disbelief whistled out of the speaker.
‘It’s where you chase around and try to zap one another.’ We didn’t only meet up for sex. OK, maybe we did, but at least we tried to be original about it.
‘I know what it is, Lyssa. Humour me; I’m trying to picture you in combat boots and camos. Do you have one of those little green vest tops?’
‘Maybe,’ I teased. ‘I guess you’ll have to come along to find out.’ Play things right and he’d also get to discover what I wore beneath it. Mentally, I began picking out my best underwear. Of course, if Victor was going to be joining us, I’d have to warn Nathan in advance. He’d been a bit off since Wednesday night, but as he’d never had any problems with me playing with other guys before, I’d largely put that down to his plans being disrupted, rather than suspicions about what I’d done after he’d left.
‘I don’t know. It’s not really my scene.’
The first time I’d taken part, I hadn’t anticipated it being my scene either. Determined not to let him off the hook – he might not make another offer, and so far he hadn’t suggested an alternative date – I rambled on for a few more minutes, trying to persuade him to come along, and giving him directions to the site. The grounds were in an area of private woodland, a mile or two outside of town. Nathan knew the site owners. He even refereed for them occasionally, hence on nights like tonight we got the place to ourselves.
‘How many guys, Lyssa?’
‘I’m not sure. Some of them bunk off home early.’ His soft cough told me I’d missed his meaning.
‘How many do you play late with?’
It wasn’t as if I was admitting to anything he didn’t already know, but I still put off giving an answer until the silence between us grew awkward. ‘Five – but only three of them will be along tonight.’ David and Sam avoided the out-of-doors, and they only ever really watched anyway.
‘Uh-huh.’ Disappointment threaded the two syllables. His disapproval cut me up. I wanted him, you see, and I’d convinced myself it wasn’t the fact I was involved with several other guys that had put him off the other night. ‘It’s just I’m not altogether sure I want to be number six.’
I refrained from swearing, but only just. ‘Then why did you phone?’ I hung up.
I’d heard it all before, about how I was a slut with extra-loose morals and a slack pussy, about how I was a user and whore. I’d taken it from former friends and strangers, but I wasn’t going to listen to it again from him. Since he’d known there were other men in my life, why the hell had he even bothered to call?
He probably thought he was the guy who could save me. That he’d fill me up with his magical dick and then I’d never need anyone else in my hoo-hah. Well, I didn’t believe in magic dicks, and my pussy liked being kissed by multiple men.
I switched my phone over to aeroplane mode and shoved it deep into my pocket.
Hattie joined me about two seconds later, carrying a box of assorted greetings cards. ‘I thought we could have a bit of a swap around.’ I didn’t hide my irritation quickly enough, causing her to frown. ‘Is everything all right? Nothing’s up with you and Nathan, is there? That’s who you were talking to, right?’
‘Nothing’s wrong. We were just sorting out arrangements for tonight.’ I hated lying to her; really I did, but it was easier and less risky than presenting the truth.
‘Again. You’re always out. He must really love you, Lyssa. He’s always taking you places. Hey, you never told me what he got you for your birthday?’
‘Ah, yes. It was just some bits and bobs I asked for.’ In fact, he’d bought me fishnets, a garter and a whip, and suggested a bit of role-playing one night. I was to be a wannabe cabaret star, and he’d be the club manager, with whoever else wanted to join in acting as club patrons. It wasn’t clear to me where the whip came in. I suspected he’d bought it to use on me, rather than the other way around.
‘No fun for me tonight,’ Hattie complained. ‘Not that there’s anyone offering to take me anywhere.’
‘How come? You’re in now. You can’t be down for the late as well.’
‘Val wanted the time off to go to her cousin’s wedding reception. I’m the saint that volunteered to cover for her.’ That was Hattie, always the one to help out, even if it inconvenienced herself. ‘There is a plus side. I’m not wholly selfless.’
There was never a plus side to working the late shift on a Friday night. It was the worst shift of the week. Nevertheless, I waited to hear the supposed positive.
‘It means I’ll be around when you-know-who gets off for the night.’
And like that Leif Haralsson slipped back into the conversation. ‘Wonderful,’ I agreed, refusing to dampen Hattie’s romantic dream. ‘You can totally use that time to charm his socks off.’
‘Maybe.’ Hattie gave a girlish chuckle, and then she sashayed around the edge of the card rack performing her best sexy wiggle. To give her credit, it was a pretty fantastic wiggle. ‘Although,’ she mused, ‘I’d rather charm something else off him.’
‘Hattie!’
‘What?’ She pressed her lips together, trying to look innocent despite an enormous smirk. ‘Maybe, I’ll even tell you about it afterwards.’
I grinned too. Not because I believed for a second that she’d even speak to the guy, let alone get him anywhere near a bedroom, but because Hattie deserved some fun. ‘Girl,’ I sighed. ‘If anything happens, you’d better spill, because I’m totally going to want to hear about it.’
Nathan picked me up at eight that night. He was sizzling in his night-time camos, and I could tell he was up for some serious fun. ‘Careful,’ I warned him. ‘If you keep turning up in all these costumes, I might forget what you normally dress like.’
‘Wait until you see the pimpy suit I’ve bought. Cabaret night is going to be mega hot. I was thinking of arranging it for next weekend. What do you think?’
‘Maybe. Let’s not decide yet.’ I still wasn’t sure about it. It sounded a little too sleazy for my tastes, although Nathan was clearly well into the idea. ‘You know I don’t dance, don’t you, before you go getting any ideas about me cavorting with a chair, or any other nonsense.’
I guessed from his pout that was exactly what he’d been envisaging. Sadly, I was no Liza Minnelli, and definitely no Dita Von Teese.
‘You’d put on a little show for me though, wouldn’t you, Lys?’
‘No,’ I insisted. ‘I don’t dance.’
We completed the first half of the journey through the evening traffic listening to the radio. It was only once we’d crossed from the suburbs out into the open countryside that we spoke again.
‘You’re moping,’ Nathan observed, though how he could tell I wasn’t sure. I’d been making a particular effort to not think about Victor or our earlier phone call. It only made my blood boil.
‘Want to tell me what about?’
‘Nope.’
‘Something at work?’
‘I said nope.’
‘Has that jerk phoned you?’
An enormous telling sigh, wormed its way out of my mouth. ‘Once.’ It was almost a relief to admit it, even though I was loath to discuss the ins and outs of the conversation. ‘Nothing of interest was said.’ A fact I remained disappointed by. Maybe Victor was a jerk, but he was a jerk who hit my pleasure centres like nuclear fuel. I’d had high hopes when he’d rung.
‘What the fuck were you thinking even giving him your number? When did you give him your number? Didn’t you notice the fact that he had fucking weirdo stamped across his forehead? You don’t give out personal information to guys like that.’
When Nathan ranted, he sounded exactly like my father, and if I’d taken his advice, the only men I’d ever have seen would have been the local vicar and the dentist.
‘I mean, come on, Lys. Who the hell hangs around to watch when they’ve just stumbled upon some folks having a good time? The decent thing to do would be to turn a blind eye, not ogle them.’
I defensively squished my hands between my thighs. All things considered, Victor probably only weighed up at five per cent weird, versus ninety-five per cent hot. As ratios went, that wasn’t a bad one. Shame then, that he’d been unable to accept the small things that were weird about me.
‘I didn’t actually. Sam did. And it’s irrelevant anyhow.’ We weren’t going to see each other again.
‘I suppose I ought to ask what happened after I left. He was still in the room, wasn’t he?’
‘Nothing,’ I mumbled. I felt no inclination whatsoever to share the details of what I’d done. It’d only lead to another lecture about not placing myself in danger and being especially wary of dark, handsome strangers. Nathan seemed to have forgotten that we’d met in a taxi rank, and bonked in the back of a cab only a few minutes later.
‘Really, nothing? Because Sam said you came down from the green room with him looking pretty cosy.’
‘Leave it will you, Nathan,’ I barked in irritation. ‘Nothing happened. He didn’t touch me. I’ve told you that already. We’ve had one conversation since. There won’t be anymore. If you want a reason for why I’m pissed off, why don’t you ask me how my birthday treat panned out? What was it I was promised – a night to remember? Yeah, I don’t think I’m ever going to forget being walked in on.’ I wasn’t being fair, but his prodding had made me tetchy. I just wanted him to drop the subject.
Shock, then sin widened his tawny eyes. ‘Shit, Lyssa! That was hardly my fault. See if I don’t make it up to you tonight. Hell, I can stop the car now and make amends, if you want.’
I didn’t want. A quickie in the backseat, parked up in a lay-by, wasn’t going to improve my mood. Thankfully, the road was so narrow and winding, that stopping was out of the question.
‘What did he phone you for?’ Nathan asked, after we’d travelled another half a mile.
‘A date.’
‘A what?’
He hit the accelerator in his surprise, throwing us both against our seats. Thank God, it wasn’t milking time at the local farm, because if there’d been anything in the road we’d have hit it. As it was we overshot the site entrance.
‘Nathan!’
He stepped hard on the brake, thus bringing us to a screeching halt just past the turning. It was marked with an arrow, but I’d learned to recognise it by the two stone pillars that stood either side of the driveway. They were crumbling beneath a dressing of ivy, and I suspect mourned the days when they were grand gateposts to some country estate.
Unapologetically, Nathan put the car into reverse and swung the car around. ‘And?’ he enquired, once we were safely headed in the right direction.
‘And nothing. I’ve already told you I won’t be seeing him again.’
‘You’ve said it, but I don’t quite believe you. You’re hot for him; I can hear it in your voice. So why aren’t you seeing him again? Not because of me, I’ll bet.’
‘We’re not together like that,’ I replied, adding a defensive huff. I didn’t appreciate how guilt-ridden he seemed intent on making me feel about this.
‘No. No, I’ve got it.’ Nathan gave a low whistle. ‘You told him that you’re already shagging three other guys, didn’t you?’
I hadn’t quite put it like that, but nor had I told any lies.
Nathan’s mirth exploded more fully, until he was almost choking on his laughter. If he hadn’t been driving, I swear I’d have clobbered him. ‘What!’ he laughed. ‘Did you honestly think he was going to accept that? Jump right into the mix and agree to only having you on Tuesdays and Thursdays?’
‘It’s what you and the other guys do.’
‘No, Lyssa, it isn’t. We’re mates. We’ve all known each other forever, and we all know the score. Everyone understands what the boundaries are, and the guys let me know about any wacky plans they have. Victor would never agree to that.’
I actually found it hard to fault Victor for that fact. Whenever Nathan summarised what was going on between us, he had this knack of making it sound sordid, and somehow exploitative. The reality wasn’t like that, but … Well, I guess it was just something about his tone, and the fact he made me sound like a convenience. I was just a nice simple way for them all to get their rocks off without having to moderate their behaviour in order to preserve a relationship. Well, for their information I’d have liked it if they had treated me like a proper date once in a while. And it might even have been nice to have them squabble over me, because, yes, while I loved sex – upside down, back to front, even standing on my head – that didn’t mean I didn’t crave a bit of old-fashioned affection from time to time. And it certainly didn’t mean I warranted any less respect than they’d give a proper girlfriend.
‘I suggest you shut up now, unless you want to turn round and take me home,’ I warned.
My expression must have been grim, for he promptly agreed.
‘I’m sorry, Lyssa. Laughing was unnecessary, but you should have realised things would never work out with him.’
I turned away from Nathan to watch the last of the scenery roll by. We’d entered the woodland now, and even the road was furrowed by tree roots. Maybe Nathan was speaking the truth, but that didn’t mean he had to labour the point.
When we reached the end of the track, we found a small group of guys and girls already assembled outside the base camp lodge. Most of them were dressed like Nathan in some form of camouflage. All of them were toting laser guns. Some were busy pulling on goggles and sensors.
Nathan reached across the gearstick once he’d stopped the car engine, and squeezed my thigh. ‘Forget him, Lys. Let’s not argue, and just have a good time.’
‘Sure.’ I got out of the car determined to do as he suggested. Victor meant nothing. The most sensible thing I could do was to write him off as a one-night stand. It wasn’t as if that was a new experience and hence something to dwell on.
The minute I got out of the car, my mood immediately improved. Two pairs of arms surrounded me, and I was lifted off my feet.
