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Joe’s jaw tensed, and she feared he was digging in his heels for a battle of attrition. Was he unwilling to understand, to care about her dilemma, her personal stake in all of this?
“I’m not into secrets,” he said.
She knew that. That’s why she’d never told Joe about having to sneak out to meet him. “I’ll tell my dad the truth, but I don’t want him finding out until I think his health can handle it.”
“So what are you asking me? Not to tell your father?”
“I’m asking that you honor my secret and my privacy. If I share that information with you, I want you to promise not to tell anyone until I say it’s okay.”
Before Joe could speak, the waitress brought their food. The silence was almost overpowering, as Kristin awaited Joe’s decision.
She studied her plate and poked at her food. But it wasn’t just nervousness and a guilty conscience that made her stomach all atwitter. It was the sandy-haired man across the table, the man she’d never been able to shake from her blood. Or her heart.
Time heals, the old adage said. But did it? Why did her old lover continue to stir up feelings and desires she’d buried years ago?
A wave of guilt splashed over her, as she thought about Dylan, her fiancé. He was a good man. Solid. Dependable. Willing to make a commitment. Yet, if truth be told, he didn’t stir the same fire that Joe did.
But there was more to life than hot sex. And quite frankly, a warm, dependable soul who would stick by a woman through good times and bad would prove to be invaluable in the years to come.
“Okay, Kristin. I promise to keep your secret.” His gaze cornered her, demanded to hear the words. “Am I Bobby’s father?”
The tears slipped down her cheeks, revealing the words her mouth couldn’t seem to form. She nodded her yes.
Joe had suspected Bobby was his son. Kristin’s affirmation only validated what he already sensed. He could tell by looking, by some kind of built-in parental instinct, maybe.
A part of him wanted to lash out and be angry that she’d kept their child a secret from him. But guilt came flying back in his court. After all, he’d been the one to end things that day at the ball field. And he’d made it clear he didn’t want to see her again. He couldn’t blame her for staying away.
And as long as he was placing blame, he’d throw some out at their fathers—hers for being so obstinate about wanting what was best for his daughter and his for being a low-life jerk.
But that didn’t change the current fact.
Joe Davenport had a son. A boy who was a lot like him.
And for some reason that didn’t make any sense whatsoever, it pleased him to know he and Kristin had made a baby.
He’d loved her so much back then. Of course, that was before he knew how much her father hated him, how star-crossed their relationship had been. Still, their short time together had been good—almost magical—while it lasted.
And they’d made a baby.
“Think it happened out at the lake, that afternoon?” he asked. “Or at the cabin in Julian?”
“Huh?”
His question seemed to take Kristin aback, as though she’d forgotten about the day she’d first given herself to him.
“We only made love a couple of times,” he continued. “And I guess it really doesn’t matter when Bobby was conceived.”
“It was at the cabin,” she said, her voice soft and gentle. “I’m not sure how I know, but—”
“You’re probably right.” Joe had that same feeling. The day had been special. Perfect. And if God chose to bless the world with a new baby, that would have been the time.
A sappy grin rose to the surface, and he couldn’t stop the excitement that bubbled inside. He wanted to be the kind of father he’d missed having. A father like Harry Logan, who always had time to listen, time to advise. Time to throw back his head and laugh, to enjoy an afternoon with his family, even if that family included a bunch of onetime bad boys like Joe.
Yep, Joe wanted to be that kind of dad to Bobby. He wanted to have backyard barbecues and toss footballs around on the grass. He wanted to take his boy fishing. And teach him how to ride a bike, if Bobby didn’t know how already. They’d play catch. And—
Kristin kept brushing the tears from her eyes.
Sheesh. Was she unhappy about telling him? Or sorry she’d kept the secret? Joe wasn’t sure what broke the floodgates, but he felt responsible. He reached across the table and took her hand. “I’m happy about this.”
She looked up at him, surprise splashed across her face. “You are?”
“Yeah.” He shot her a smile that he hoped would help ease her mind, in one way or another. “I like the idea of having a kid.”
“But you understand, we have to take this slow. Right?”
“Yes,” Joe told her, “but I want you to understand something, too.”
“What’s that?”
“I might have agreed to hold off announcing my fatherhood, but that doesn’t mean I don’t expect to be involved in my son’s life.”
She nodded. “I understand.”
“Starting immediately.”
“What do you mean?” She pulled her hand back, and her eyes widened. “You promised not to say anything.”
“I won’t. I’ll keep the secret. But I didn’t say anything about staying away. I’ll start off by being his friend, you know, a fireman who took an interest in a fatherless boy.”
She seemed to relax, to accept his compromise. “I suppose that will work.”
“Some guys might not like a surprise like this, Kristin. But I’m not just any guy. I want to take an active part in Bobby’s life. And I plan to be the best dad in the whole world.”
She fingered the stem of her wineglass, then looked at him. Lord, she had the prettiest green eyes he’d ever seen. He’d missed gazing at her.
“But this is a secret for now,” she said.
“For now.” Joe shot her a smile. “But we’re going to tell Bobby. Soon.”
“When the time is right,” Kristin insisted. “You promised to let me decide when that would be.”
He had, although he was having cold feet about the promise. Still, he owed her something. He’d gotten her pregnant, then told her he didn’t love her anymore, left her to fend for herself and the baby.
Yep. He owed her something. And he’d given his word to keep quiet until she said the time was right.
But as far as he was concerned, that day couldn’t come too soon.
Thomas Reynolds might not think Joe was good enough for his daughter. And maybe he was right. But Bobby was a Davenport.
Once upon a time, Joe might have backed down when it came to a relationship with Kristin. But this was different. He wouldn’t bow out of his son’s life. Not now. Not ever.
Kristin and her father had better brace themselves, because Joe Davenport was going to be a father to his son.
And he would fight whoever got in the way.
Chapter Three
K ristin knew Joe meant to be a part of Bobby’s life, but she hadn’t expected him to show up at the front door on his next off-duty day, wearing a white T-shirt, a pair of faded jeans and a smile that battered the wall she’d built around her heart.
“I came to see Bobby,” he said.
She fought the urge to look over her shoulder, to see who had seen him at the door. But she didn’t dare peek; she didn’t really need to. Her father’s room was on the backside of the house, and he was busy on the Internet this morning, dabbling with his online stock purchases.
Besides, as a fireman, Joe’s interest in Bobby seemed reasonable. Her father couldn’t find any fault in that.
“I’d like to take Bobby to the station and introduce him to some of the guys. You know, let him see the equipment. Get a private tour.”
When he flashed her another crooked smile, she couldn’t help but relax. Somewhat.
For some crazy reason, she wished she’d known he was coming so that she could’ve run a comb through her hair, put on some lipstick.
But Joe had come to see Bobby, not her. And she had no business primping for her old lover. Not when she’d already been burned by him and his change of heart. And not when she had a commitment to someone else.
Kristin called her son, and moments later Bobby came bounding downstairs.
“Uh-oh.” The little boy slowed his steps when he laid eyes on the off-duty fireman on the stoop. “I haven’t been playing with the lighter anymore.”
“That’s good,” Joe said. “I came by to talk to you about fire safety and doing me and the guys down at the station a favor.”
“You want me to do a favor for you?” Bobby’s eyes grew wide. “Sure. What is it?”
“We’d like you to represent the fire department while you’re at school. You know, by telling the kids about the dangers of playing with matches and lighters. After all, you’ve seen what happens when a fire gets out of hand.”
Bobby broke into a full-on grin. “Cool.”
“Of course, I’d make you a Junior Fire Marshal,” Joe said, “so the kids know you’ve been trained and certified by the department.”
“That’s way cool.” Bobby made his way to the front door and gazed at the man he didn’t realize was his daddy with such admiration, such awe, such respect, that Kristin had to swallow a lump in her throat and blink back tears.
Joe shot a glance at her. “If it’s all right with your mom, I’d like to take you down to the station this morning.”
A part of her wanted to hold Bobby tight, to keep him away from his father. To keep the future from unfolding without her. But she couldn’t say no.
The idea of those two peas in a pod taking off without her didn’t sit well, though. She’d love to witness their first father-son experience and longed to see them together, to watch their reactions. But she’d better conjure an excuse other than the truth.
“I’ve never had an official tour of a fire station,” she said, trying to make her interest sound as though it had nothing to do with father and son. “Can I go along, too?”
Joe studied her for a moment, his thoughts impossible to read. Then he shrugged and slid her a half smile. “Sure.”
Had her request surprised him? Bothered him? She wasn’t sure, but something told her he was merely being polite for her son’s sake.
For their son’s sake.
Her secret had become his secret, and she hoped he would honor it until she deemed the time was right to reveal it.
“If you’ll excuse me,” she said. “I’ll get my purse.”
Moments later, they all climbed into his Tahoe and started down the road. Bobby sat in the middle of the spacious backseat, as eager and excited as Kristin had ever seen him.
How strange, she thought. To be riding down the street in Joe’s SUV. Like a family on the way to the amusement park. Or to the movie theater, the mall or the beach.
It seemed so right yet, at the same time, surreal.
Kristin found it difficult not to glance across the seat at the tall, rugged man behind the wheel. Impossible to ignore his square chin, the quirk of his smile, the glimmer in his gold-flecked eyes.
Even when she looked straight ahead, she couldn’t help but relish the smell within the cab of his vehicle, a combination of new car and Joe’s light, musky aftershave.
But Kristin wasn’t the only one having trouble keeping her eyes to herself. Joe kept glancing at Bobby, at his hair, his face. The little hands that rested upon small knees.
Was he taking inventory? Checking the Davenport contribution to the boy?
Kristin found Joe’s interest heartwarming, but at the same time scary. She’d never had to share Bobby before and she refused to consider the thought of cross-country visitation. It was more than a mom could handle at this point.
When they reached the station, Joe parked in back, next to a white Jeep Wrangler and a blue Ford Explorer. “We’re here.”
“All right!” Bobby’s enthusiasm was hard to ignore.
And so was her own nervous excitement. She hadn’t been to visit Joe’s home away from home in years.
Joe watched Kristin and Bobby climb from the Tahoe. He’d intended to spend time with his son alone, and Kristin’s request to join them had taken him by surprise. Didn’t she trust him to be alone with Bobby? They’d made a deal, and she ought to know he’d abide by it. For the time being, anyway.
Of course, having her come along wasn’t so bad. In fact, it was kind of nice. Made him almost feel like part of a family.
But if he knew what was good for him, he’d stop thinking about stuff like that.
Things between him and Kristin had ended a long time ago, and he had no intention of resurrecting something destined to crash and burn. Especially with a woman who would choose her father over him every time.
And Thomas Reynolds wasn’t just any man, any father. The hard-ass real estate tycoon had pulled a few political and financial favors and fought to thwart Harry’s efforts to gain leniency in Joe’s case. He’d argued that Bayside didn’t need another known juvenile delinquent back on city streets. Joe wasn’t so sure that Reynolds wasn’t just trying to get back at him personally, because the wealthy businessman hadn’t spoken in juvenile court since.
Fortunately, the judge had seen the results of Harry’s involvement with other troubled young boys and ruled in Joe’s favor. But Joe had a feeling Reynolds had never gotten over the court’s decision.
And Joe doubted he ever would.
There wasn’t much the wealthy landowner did that Joe didn’t pay close attention to. And more than one Bayside citizen had crossed Thomas Reynolds, only to meet with financial ruin somewhere down the line. A coincidence? Joe didn’t think so.
Shoving aside his resentment of Kristin’s father, he placed a hand on Bobby’s shoulder. “Come on, I’ll introduce you to my family.”
The first fireman they met was Sam Henley, a five-year veteran on the squad. “Hey, Davenport. What’s up?”
