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Glancing at her new employer, she realized he looked as if he’d been punched, and she wished she could think of something to say that would make everything all right. Absolutely nothing came to mind.
He glanced at his watch, then over his shoulder before turning his attention to her. “I know this is something we need to get settled, but—” He looked down, shaking his head. “It’s not like it isn’t important, because it is, but I need to get the chores done.”
In the distance, she could hear the bellowing of cattle, obviously waiting to be fed. She wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to let him walk away without settling the question of her employment, but she knew the importance of feeding livestock on time. “It’s all right,” she told him, hoping he didn’t pick up on her insecurity. “We can settle it later.”
He visibly relaxed, although his smile was shaky, at best. “Great. I mean, thanks. We’ll do it at lunch.” He started to move away, but stopped. “If that’s okay.” When she nodded, he let out a long breath. “Then I’ll be back around noon.”
Seeing that things were as settled as they could be for the time being, she turned for the house. She was nearly inside when she heard him call to her.
“I’ll just put these suitcases on the porch, until we decide what we’re going to do.”
“That’s fine. I’ll just...” What? Worry? She couldn’t say that, and she needed to reassure him that all would be well, even if she wasn’t all that sure they would be. “I’ll check on Brayden and get his breakfast started.”
She didn’t wait for an answer and, once inside with the door closed firmly behind her, she did her best to put aside the fear and disappointment that she might not have a job after all. Knowing that staying busy would help keep her from thinking of her current dilemma, she went upstairs and found Brayden’s room. She soon had him awake and out of bed, so they could start their day. He didn’t make a sound as she dressed him or while he ate his breakfast. When he finished eating, she checked the kitchen cabinets and pantry with thoughts of lunch and supper in mind, while he played in the family room with the toys she’d brought for him.
“Cow!” he announced, holding the plastic animal up for her to see.
“And a lovely cow it is,” she said, laughing. She hoped it wasn’t the only word he knew. After all, he was two and should have a better vocabulary than one word.
Later, when Brayden began to rub his eyes, Hayley took him upstairs to his bed for a nap before lunch, then she returned to the kitchen. She expected Luke to appear at any time, and she’d planned to have a more substantial meal ready for him and Brayden. But between her disgust at herself for assuming things she shouldn’t and the fact that there was practically nothing to eat in the house, she was left with literally throwing together some sandwiches.
“How’s it going?”
She turned to see the object of her thoughts standing in the doorway, and she searched for something to say. “I wasn’t sure if you like mayonnaise, but since I couldn’t find any—” She pressed her lips together, realizing she was complaining, and went back to the preparations. It took every bit of her concentration to place the thick slices of ham, tomatoes and cheese between the pieces of bread. There was no reason to let him know how nervous he made her, and she quickly chalked it up to her fear of losing the job. No matter whether it was live-in or not, she needed it to help pay off her student loan and finish her master’s degree. Not only that, but after a few hours with Brayden, she’d already fallen for the little boy.
Determined not to worry, she stacked the sandwiches on a plate. When she turned around, she was surprised to see Luke across the island counter from her.
“You didn’t need to do this,” he said as she placed the plate in front of him.
“It’s all right,” she answered with a shrug. “I consider it to be part of the job.” If she still had a job.
He settled on a tall, upholstered stool and picked up a sandwich. “I appreciate it. Today’s a little crazy, but it’ll get better.”
Instead of answering, she nodded and placed a glass of iced tea near his plate. “Lemon or sugar?”
“No, nothing. This is great.”
They fell silent as he ate and she started a quick cleanup. The quiet, along with not knowing where she stood when it came to the job, nearly made her physically ill, and she decided it was time to ask if he’d made a decision. “Mr. Walker? I mean, Luke,” she corrected immediately. He turned to look at her and she took a deep breath. “I just wanted to apologize—”
“Wait.” He held up his hand. “I need to say something, but I’m not sure how to go about it. And I’m a little embarrassed. What I tried to say earlier was that it was my fault you’d gotten the wrong impression about the job, and I...well, I apologize.”
The air whooshed out of her chest. Here she was, ready to apologize again, and he was taking the blame. She felt a small, warm glow of appreciation.
“Look, I know I shouldn’t make excuses, but it’s been a rough couple of years,” he continued. “I should have been clear to you and my sister about what I expected in a nanny, instead of letting Erin handle things.”
“Apology accepted.” She smiled, hoping that he would see she was sincere. And she was, but they still needed to settle the live-in situation. “Have you—” She cleared her throat, determined to get it over with. “Have you made a decision about whether I’ll be staying?”
He didn’t speak for a moment. “I don’t really need someone here all the time,” he explained, “and I’d pay extra for your gas and time, if that’s what’s bothering you.”
“It isn’t that,” she told him, although she had worried about the extra expense. “Driving back and forth leaves me very little time to study.”
“Right. I forgot you mentioned school. What kind of classes are you taking?”
Because he seemed genuinely interested, she answered. “I’m working on my master’s degree in hope of becoming a PA.”
“PA?”
“Physician’s assistant.”
There was a spark of interest in his eyes. “That’s like almost a doctor, right?”
She tried not to laugh. “Well, a little.”
“I’m impressed. So how much longer until you have your degree?”
“In May. If I’m lucky.” She didn’t add that without the job, she’d have nowhere to live. She’d been sharing a small efficiency apartment in the city with another nurse, but her roommate had gotten married. She couldn’t afford a place on her own. Not with college expenses to pay. The live-in nanny job was perfect for her, especially since she loved children.
“Then you’ll be looking for a medical job?”
“That’s the plan. Whether I find one or not is the question.”
He fell silent for a moment. “I probably could use the extra help,” he finally said, although there was a hesitancy in his voice. “And Brayden obviously took to you. Any problems this morning?”
She shook her head, thinking of the darling little boy who had wanted to share everything he could with her, from his toys to his view out the window overlooking the patio. “He was an angel. He even took a morning nap without prodding, and that’s not very common for someone his age. Two-year-olds will sometimes fight until they drop.”
Luke’s grin revealed his good humor. “It’s usually next thing to a world war when I try to put him down. You must have the knack. But I’ll warn you, it may not last.”
As if on cue, Brayden appeared in the doorway, his curly hair sticking out in every direction. “Wanna dink.”
Hayley hurried over to him and scooped him into her arms. “And how about a sandwich to go with that dink?” she asked him as she gave him a hug.
“Sammich!” He wiggled in her arms, but she managed to hold tight until she pulled the high chair over next to his dad and set him in it.
“He’s a bright little guy,” she told Luke. While father and son chattered at each other, she retrieved the jelly sandwich she’d prepared for Brayden earlier and poured a cup of milk.
“You managed to find your way around?” Luke asked.
“Yes,” she answered, tying a bib around Brayden’s neck. “It’s a beautiful house. And so much room, too,” she added, but suddenly wished she hadn’t.
He put his elbow on the table and propped his chin in his hand, obviously comfortable with the question, unlike earlier. “You like it?”
She took a seat on the other side of Brayden, and answered without thinking. “Who wouldn’t?”
Fearing it had been the wrong thing to say, she held her breath as Luke shrugged and pushed away from the counter. “It’s just big,” he said. “More room than Brayden and I need, that’s for sure.” He ruffled his son’s hair and stood. “You need to leave by six, right?”
“No, not tonight. I have early classes on Monday, Wednesday and Friday.”
“You’ll need a little time to settle in, then. I can be done by six.”
“If that works for you, I won’t argue. Would it be all right if I take Brayden into town, after lunch?” she asked, then hurried to add, “I’ll make sure he gets a longer nap when we get back. I’d like to pick up some groceries, if you don’t mind, and Brayden might enjoy the outing.”
Luke rubbed his chin with his knuckles and nodded. “Yeah, we do need some stuff.” He gave her a sheepish smile. “I never seem to know what to get and usually end up with nothing I need and everything I don’t.”
She cleaned the jelly from Brayden’s face and hands and helped him down from the chair. “Don’t worry about it,” she told Luke. “I’ll get you back up to par with the food.”
“I’ll call the grocery store and have them charge it to me.”
She nodded. “Just give me a limit, and I’ll go from there.”
“Whatever we need,” he said with a shrug. “No limit.”
She wasn’t accustomed to buying food for someone she didn’t know and hoped she would make wise decisions. Brayden was easy to figure out, but she wasn’t so sure about his dad. “Is there anything special you like?” she asked.
“Just about everything. Meat and potatoes or whatever. I’m not picky, as long as it’s easy to fix. No need for you to spend a lot of time cooking.” He glanced at his watch and frowned. “I’d better get back to work, or I won’t be done by six.”
“I only need to know where Brayden’s car seat is, and we’ll be all set for the rest of the day.”
He walked to the doorway that led to the garage, but didn’t open the door. “The spare is out here. I hardly use it, so just keep it in your car. I can get it for you.”
“No need,” she said in a rush. “I’ll find it. I’ve taken up enough of your time.”
He gave a quick nod. When Brayden ran to him and clasped his arms around his daddy’s legs, Luke reached down and mussed his hair. “I’ll be back later, buddy. You be good for Hayley, okay?”
Both of them looked at Hayley, and she offered them a smile. “We’ll be fine.”
“Well, okay then,” Luke said, while removing his son from his legs. “I’ll bring your suitcases in. I guess you saw that there’s a spare room right around the corner there.”
“Yes, a very nice room. It’ll be fine. Thank you.”
“And you can put your car in the garage, too.” he told her, and she thanked him again.
Hesitating, he finally opened the door and left without saying anything else. Hayley breathed a sigh of pure relief. She had a job. And she loved Brayden. But her new boss unnerved her. One minute he was all business and unwilling to talk, and she could handle that. But when he loosened up and became what she suspected was the real Luke Walker, she felt that old, familiar fluttery feeling in her stomach. That same feeling she’d had when she first met Nathan. But that had eventually turned sour, and she’d ended it, relieved that she did. She’d learned a lesson from the whole experience, and now she was determined to concentrate on finishing school. She’d simply focus on her studies and her tiny charge until that fluttering went away.
* * *
LUKE DRIED HIS HANDS on the towel and checked the time. Right on the dot. He wasn’t late.
Opening the door leading from the garage mudroom to the house, he was nearly bowled over by the mouthwatering smells coming from the kitchen. He hadn’t had the pleasure of enjoying a home-cooked meal for longer than he wanted to admit, but he sure hadn’t forgotten what it was like.
He spied Hayley in the kitchen and looked around. To his surprise, he found Brayden playing quietly in the corner with the toys she’d brought him. For the past year and a half, his son had been like a burr, sticking to him at all times. He wasn’t sure what magic Hayley was working or how she was doing it, but he was happy to see Brayden being more like a kid should be.
Hunkering down next to the boy, he pointed at the plastic pony Brayden held. “Hey, guy, whatcha got there?”
Brayden looked up at him. “Sorsey,” he answered and put the pony in his dad’s hand.
Luke chuckled at Brayden’s habit of replacing an S for an H in words. “Yep, it sure is. And a mighty fine one, too.”
Spying a plastic cowboy, he picked it up and studied it. Remembering the similar set he and Dylan had played with when they were small boys, he felt the oddly familiar ache in his chest as memories of his own childhood flooded him. His early years had been happy and normal, but the later ones had brought sorrow, and he quickly pushed aside the painful thoughts.
“So how’d you and Hayley get along, Brayden? Everything go okay?”
His son looked up at him, his dark brown eyes round and full of an innocence Luke knew came and went with the wind. As if he suddenly understood, Brayden turned to look at the new nanny and responded with a throaty giggle, a sure sign that he and Hayley had hit it off.
Tugging at one of Brayden’s short curls, Luke smiled and kept his voice low. “Yeah, that’s what I figured. You got your old man’s good taste in women.”
When he realized what he had just said to his son, Luke clamped his mouth shut. Good taste? Hardly. He had been so sure that Kendra was the one-and-only girl for him. He’d been as wrong as anybody could ever be. If he could turn back the clock...
Beside him, Brayden bumped the truck against his knee. No, no turning back the clock. Kendra had given him the one thing he cared about more than life itself. Even the ranch didn’t hold a candle to the way he felt about his son. And Brayden was all his.
Getting to his feet, Luke walked the length of the long room. “Something sure smells good,” he said as he walked through the room to stand behind her. He breathed in, just as he remembered his manners. “But you really didn’t have to go to so much trouble.”
She glanced over her shoulder at him and moved to her left, away from him. “No trouble. I did some shopping today. It’s in the slow cooker. It’s ready, whenever you are.”
“I sure appreciate it.” She looked up and he caught her gaze and held it. “First day on the job, and I should be giving you a raise already,” he teased.
“No need,” she replied, her face taking on a pink color. “I expected to help with other things besides child care when I was hired.”
He felt like kicking himself for giving in to the temptation to tease her. It obviously made her uncomfortable. And why shouldn’t it? He was her employer. He hadn’t meant for his comment to come out the way it had, hadn’t meant to make it sound so... He ducked his head, wishing he could take the words back. Hell, he wasn’t trying to seduce her, so why had he felt the need to tease her in a way that sounded like he was?
She cleared her throat and he looked up at her. “I think everything you need is here,” she said.
“You’re not joining us?”
She opened the refrigerator and removed a bottle of water. “You and Brayden are used to spending your evenings together, and I’ve spent all day with him. I think he’d like some one-on-one time with his dad. I’ll see Brayden later at bedtime, if that’s all right.”
He wasn’t familiar with the ways of nannies, and he didn’t want to pressure her, especially on her first day. “Sure.”
He wasn’t sure that was right, but what did he know? They’d never had a live-in nanny before. He tried to reason with himself. Why should he care what the woman did, as long as she took good care of his son? And she seemed to be doing that, from what he’d seen.
Brayden continued to play quietly, and Luke decided Hayley was probably right about the two of them needing to spend a little special time together. He’d been so busy all day that he hadn’t realized until that moment that he missed sharing most of the day with his son.
Needing some space and a few minutes to clear his head, he joined Brayden again and helped gather up the menagerie of animals and assorted vehicles, surprised that his son helped him with the small chore. His usual style was to turn around and walk away. Luke had learned the hard way that it didn’t do any good to yell at the boy. Even at two, Brayden had developed a way to tune out anything he didn’t want to hear and had inherited his mother’s knack for tantrums. Picking up toys was one of those things that could set Brayden off in a split second. Going to bed was another.
When they finished, Luke took him by the hand, but it was Brayden who pulled Luke to the counter. Luke raised an eyebrow when the little guy pulled a bib from the counter and handed it to him, then lifted his chin without being asked so Luke could hook it behind his neck.
“Looks like you and Hayley had a good day,” Luke said, settling Brayden in his seat.
He watched her move around the counter to give Brayden a hug, and he felt even worse. In one day, his son had taken to her and she to him. If Brayden’s mother had done the same...
“I’ll see you later, Brayden,” she said, placing a kiss on the top of the boy’s head. She looked at Luke. “Same time in the morning?”
“If it works out for you, yes.”
“Then I’ll see you at six-thirty with breakfast.”
“There’s no need—”
“I don’t mind at all.”
