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“I wish I didn’t live so far away. I could help him. With my new job I’m working weekends, so that doesn’t leave a lot of time to even drive to Cimarron City when Josh isn’t in school.”
She didn’t want Ben to feel this was his problem. He lived in Tulsa and was just getting his life back. “I’m going to talk to the school on Monday about it. But that’s not what I wanted to speak with you about. A man named Jake Tanner broke up the fight and brought Josh home. He lives across the street from where it happened on Park Avenue. Could he be your captain? You said something about his living around here once. Am I crazy to even think it could be the same guy?” And why in the world did it make a difference, except that it would bug her until she found out?
“So that’s where he is. Some of my buddies from the old company who made it back were wondering where he went when he was let out of the army hospital a few months ago. He has an email address but hasn’t said where he is when he’s corresponded with any of the guys. I’ve been worried. I should have thought about Cimarron City. He lived there for a while when his father was stationed at the army base nearby. And he used to visit his grandmother there in the summer. I think his grandmother died last year, but I thought since his father is stationed in Florida, that might be where he went.”
“What happened to him?”
“I was stateside when my old company was ambushed and about a quarter of the men were killed, many others injured. Captain Tanner was one of them. A bullet in his left leg. Tore it up. I hear he almost lost it.”
She recalled how emotionally messed up Ben had been last year when he was first released from the military hospital and honorably discharged from the army. He didn’t have a job then—couldn’t hold one down—and lived with their parents in Tulsa.
“How did he seem to you?”
“He couldn’t get away fast enough. I invited him to share a drink for rescuing Josh, and he backed away as if I was contagious.”
“What did you say to him?” Half amusement, half concern came over the line from her brother.
“Nothing. He wasn’t mad at me. He was—” she searched her mind for a word to describe the earlier encounter “—vulnerable. Something was wrong. Maybe his leg was hurting or something like that. I did see his hands shaking. He tried to hide it, and he was breathing hard, sweating. That didn’t start really until he’d been talking to me for a while. Do you think it could be...” She wasn’t a doctor and had no business diagnosing a person.
“Post traumatic stress disorder?”
Ben had recovered from his physical injuries within months of returning stateside, but what had lingered and brought her brother to his knees was PTSD. Last year she’d trained her first service dog to help her brother deal with the effects of the disorder. “How’s Butch doing?”
“He’s great. You don’t know how much he changed my life for the better.”
Yes, she did. She saw her brother go from almost retreating totally from life to now holding down a job and functioning normally. He still lived with their parents, but she’d heard from her mom he was looking for his own apartment. “Are you having any problems?”
“Yes, occasionally, but Butch is right there for me. I can’t thank you enough for him. Do you think you could pay Captain Tanner a visit? See how he is? I know what happened to him was bad, and as tough as he was, I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s dealing with PTSD. It can take out the strongest people.”
Like Ben. He’d been a sergeant with an Army Special Forces Unit with lethal skills she couldn’t even imagine. Yet none of that mattered in the end.
“Please, sis. I owe Captain Tanner my life. He pulled me out of the firefight that took me down. If he hadn’t, I would have died.”
“What if it isn’t your Captain Tanner?”
“Was the person six and a half feet, dark brown hair, built like a tank, solid, with dark eyes—almost black?”
“That’s him.” She thought of the man she’d met today and realized she owed him, too. Not only for Ben but Josh. “I’ll go see him. What do you want me to do?”
As her brother told her, she visualized Jake Tanner. The glimpse of anguish she’d seen in those dark eyes haunted her. He’d been quick to disguise it until the end when he started backing away from her. That black gaze pierced straight through her heart, and she doubted he even realized what he’d telegraphed to her—he was a man in pain.
* * *
The following Tuesday, Emma brought a terrier on a leash into the back room of the Harris Animal Hospital where she worked for Dr. Harris, the father of her best friend, Abbey Winters. “I think this gal will be great to train as a service dog. She’s smart and eager.”
“Even tempered?” Abbey, her partner in the Caring Canines Foundation, asked as she looked at the medium-size dog with fur that was various shades of brown.
“Surprisingly calm. That combined with this breed’s determination and devotion can make a good service dog.”
“I’ll take her out to Caring Canines since you’re working with the German shepherd at your house.” The kennel and training facilities of the organization were housed at Winter Haven Ranch where Abbey lived with her husband, Dominic.
“Shep will make a good service dog, too. I’ve even got a possible owner for him. You know I’ve been doing the same training with Shep as I did with Butch.”
“How is your brother?”
“Doing so much better. I talked to Ben twice this past weekend.”
Abbey’s eyebrows lifted. “That’s unusual. Doesn’t your brother hate talking on the phone?”
“Yeah, he prefers video chatting where he can see a person’s face, and the second time that’s what we did. I got to see Butch. Ben looks better each time I see him. Butch has been good for my brother, and if what Ben thinks is true, Shep will be good for Captain Tanner.”
“Another soldier? Is it a physical injury? PTSD?”
“Both. When those kids I told you about yesterday jumped Josh, Captain Tanner was the man who rescued him. After he left my house Saturday, I couldn’t shake the feeling I’d heard that name somewhere. I finally remembered Ben served under a Captain Jake Tanner.”
“So you called your brother to find out. I know how you are when you get something in your head. You don’t give up until you find out the truth.”
Emma laughed. “You’ve nailed me. I called him to see. Ben did some checking around after we talked on Saturday and found out that Captain Tanner has basically withdrawn into his house. Ben has a few connections, and one thought the captain was suffering from PTSD, although he doesn’t seem to be participating in any therapy groups through the VA.”
“How does Captain Tanner feel about having a service dog?”
“I don’t know. I only talked to him that one time. I plan on taking him some brownies as a thank-you for helping Josh. Shep will go with me. I’ll introduce him to the idea of a service dog slowly.”
She wasn’t sure if Jake Tanner would even open the door. She’d use the excuse she needed more information about the three boys who attacked Josh. Not only did she want to help the captain if he was suffering from PTSD, but she did need descriptions of the boys to give her an idea who could be bullying Josh. His teacher had requested any information to help her with the situation at school.
“Shep could help him, but he needs counseling, too. Maybe he’s getting private therapy.”
“Possibly, but Ben doesn’t think so from what he’s hearing from his army buddies in the area. Do you have room in your PTSD group?” Though Emma’s best friend ran the Caring Canines Foundation, she still conducted a few counseling groups.
“If he’ll come, I’ll make room. The members are there to support each other, and talking about it has helped them. But there aren’t any soldiers in the group.”
“Maybe you should start one for people who have been bullied.” Josh was dealing with some of the same symptoms as someone with PTSD—anger, anxiety and depression.
“If I only had more time in the day. Even quitting work at the hospital hasn’t changed much because I’m training more dogs now. There is such a demand for them. So you didn’t get any answers about who’s bullying Josh from your meeting with Mrs. Alexander yesterday?”
“She hasn’t seen anything, and since I didn’t know the bullies’ names and couldn’t describe them, there wasn’t much she could do but keep an eye out for any trouble. Most of the boys in his class are bigger than Josh, so the bullies could be in Mrs. Alexander’s room. Or from the other fifth-grade classes.”
“They could even be sixth-graders. It was a good idea to get him off the bus. It’s hard for the driver to keep an eye on the road and what students are doing at the same time.” Abbey leaned down and stroked the terrier. “Did Dad give his okay on this dog?”
Emma nodded. “Your father checked her over and she’s medically sound. It’s Madi’s turn to name the dog. Let me know what she chooses.” Madi was Abbey’s ten-year-old sister-in-law whom she and Dominic were raising.
“Madi takes her job as name giver very seriously. She’ll stew on it for days,” Abbey said with a chuckle.
“Not too long. I want to start right away and a name helps. Now that I’m winding down with Shep, I have a slot open.” Since she still worked full-time at the animal hospital, she could train only one dog at a time.
Abbey took the leash from Emma. “Good. Before long we’re going to need another trainer, or you’re going to have to quit your job here.”
“Your father might have something to say about that. I’m going to look at training more than one dog. Hopefully that will help.”
“I know, but the requests for free service dogs have increased over the past few months, especially now that veterans have heard about our foundation and the VA has stopped paying for service dogs. Many of the veterans can’t afford an animal from the agencies that charge for them.”
“How are the donations coming?” Emma leaned against the exam table, the terrier rubbing against her leg.
“They’re increasing. My husband is very good at helping to raise money for Caring Canines. Dominic can attest to the good a dog can bring to a person after how Madi responded to Cottonball following her surgery to help her walk again.”
Emma smiled. “And now Madi is running everywhere. You wouldn’t know she had been in a plane crash twenty months ago.”
“She’s telling me she wants to learn to train dogs. I’m having her shadow me.”
“A trainer in the making. There was a time I thought Josh would want to train dogs, but lately nothing interests him.”
A frown slashed across Abbey’s face. “Because he’s too busy dodging the bullies after him.”
“I know God wants me to forgive the boys, but I’m not sure I can. Josh has already had to deal with losing his dad. They were very close.”
“Madi needed a woman’s influence, and I suspect Josh could benefit from a male being in his life.”
“He has Ben when he comes to visit.”
“You don’t want to get married again?” Abbey started for the reception area of the animal hospital, leading the terrier on a leash.
Emma followed her down the hallway. “I know you found love with Dominic, but Sam gave me everything I needed. I’ve had my time.” Abbey had loved her husband so much that when he’d died, it had left a big hole in her heart she didn’t think any man could fill.
“That’s wonderful, but he’s been gone for three years. I realized when I met and fell in love with Dominic that we could have second chances, and they can work out beautifully.”
“Says a lady madly in love with her husband. When am I going to fit a man into my life with work, training dogs and raising Josh?”
“When your heart is ready,” Abbey said. They stood at the entrance into the reception area where a client waited with her cat. Abbey winked at Emma and started toward the main door. “See you later at the ranch.”
“I’ll be there today, but tomorrow I’m going to be busy baking brownies and scouting out the situation with Captain Tanner. At the very least, my brother wants a report he’s okay. And if Captain Tanner needs Shep, I’ll do my best to persuade him of the benefits of a service dog.”
At the door Abbey turned back and answered, “He may need more than Shep. Animal companionship is great but so is human companionship.” She gave a saucy grin then left.
Emma faced the receptionist and lady in the waiting room. “Ignore what that woman said. She doesn’t know what she’s talking about.” Emma turned and headed for exam room one to prepare it for the next client. The sound of chuckles followed her down the hallway, and heat reddened her cheeks.
* * *
On Wednesday, Jake’s hand shook as he reread the letter from the army. He was being awarded the Distinguished Service Medal for his heroic actions in the mountains in Afghanistan.
Why? I’m no hero. Not everyone came home. Those left behind are the true heroes.
Guilt mingled with despair as he fought to keep the memories locked away. The bombs exploding. The peppering of gunfire. The screams and cries. The stench of death and gunpowder.
The letter slipped from his hand and floated to the floor. He couldn’t protect all his men. He’d tried. But he’d lost too many. Friends. Battle buddies.
He hung his head and his gaze latched on to the letter. Squeezing his eyes shut, he still heard in his mind the words General Hatchback would say when he gave him the medal during the Veterans Day Ceremony—six weeks away. And no doubt, his father would be there.
No, he wouldn’t go. He didn’t deserve it. He’d done his duty. He didn’t want a medal for that. He just wanted to be left alone.
The doorbell chimed, startling him. He jerked his head up and looked toward the foyer. He went to the window and saw the delivery guy from the grocery store. Using his cane, he covered the distance to the door at a quick pace and let the young man in.
“Hi, Mr. Tanner. I’ll put these on the counter in your kitchen.”
While Morgan took the sacks into that room, Jake retrieved his wallet from his bedroom and pulled out some money for a tip then met the guy in the foyer. “Thanks. See you a week from tomorrow.”
“I’m off next Thursday. A big game at school. Got to support our Trojans.”
“When will you be working next week?” Jake handed him the tip.
“Friday afternoon and evening.” Morgan stuffed the money into his pocket.
“Then I’ll call my order in for that day.”
“You don’t have to. Steve delivers when I don’t.”
Jake put his hand on the knob. “That’s okay. Friday is fine. I’ll have enough to tide me over until then.” He was used to Morgan. The young man did a good job, even putting his meat and milk into the refrigerator for him. He didn’t want a stranger here. Jake swung the front door open for Morgan to leave.
“Sure, if that’s what you want.” The teen left.
When Jake moved to close the door behind Morgan, he caught sight of Emma and a black and brown German shepherd coming up the sidewalk. He couldn’t very well act as if he wasn’t home, and there was no way he would hurt her by ignoring the bell since she’d seen him. But company was not what he wanted to deal with at the moment.
Then his gaze caught the smile that encompassed her face, dimpling her cheeks and adding sparkle to her sky-blue eyes as though a light shone through them. He couldn’t tell her to go home. He’d see her for a few minutes then plead work, which was true. He had a paper due for his doctorate program.
“Hi. How are you doing today?” Emma stopped in front of him, presenting him with a plate covered with aluminum foil. “I brought a thank-you gift. Brownies—the thick, chewy kind. I hope you like chocolate.”
“Love it. How did you know?”
“Most people do, so I thought it was a safe dessert to make for you. I love to bake and this is one of my specialties.”
“Thanks. You and my neighbor ought to get together. Marcella is always baking,” he said, with the corners of his mouth twitching into a grin, her own smile affecting him.
“And bringing you some of it?”
“Yes.” He stared into her cheerful expression and wanted to shout there was nothing to be upbeat about, but something nipped his negative thoughts—at least temporarily. Her bright gaze captured him and held him in its grasp.
Since Saturday, he’d been plagued with memories of their meeting that day. He’d even considered going to her house and seeing how Josh was. He only got a couple of feet from his porch before he turned around. They were strangers, and she didn’t need to be saddled with a man—even as a friend—who was crippled physically and emotionally.
Jake stepped away from the entrance. “Come in. I have to put away the rest of my groceries.” For a few seconds, panic unfolded deep inside him. He was out of practice carrying on a normal conversation with a civilian after so many years in war-conflicted areas. Sucking in a deep breath, he shoved the anxiety down.
As she passed him, a whiff of her flowery scent wafted to him—lavender. His mother used to wear it. For a few seconds he was thrust into the past. He remembered coming into the kitchen when his mom took a pan of brownies out of the oven. The aromas of chocolate and lavender competed for dominance in his thoughts, and a sense of comfort engulfed him.
Emma turned toward him with that smile still gracing her full mouth. It drew him toward her, stirring other feelings in him. He’d had so little joy in his life lately. That had to be the reason he responded to a simple grin.
“It’s this way.” He limped ahead of her through the dining room and into the kitchen.
“I like this.” Emma put the plate on the center island counter. “It’s cozy and warm. Do you cook?”
“No, unless you call cooking opening a can and heating up whatever is in it. My meals aren’t elaborate. A lot of frozen dinners.” Jake’s gaze landed on the German shepherd. Beautiful dog to go with a beautiful woman, but why did she bring the animal with her? Had his strange behavior the other day scared her somehow? When a panic attack took hold of him, it was hard for him to do much about it, which only made the situation worse.
