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‘You’re going to have to intubate,’ Rilla told Henry briskly as she hooked Bridie up to the monitors and another apnoea required Rilla to give a vigorous sternal rub before it resolved. This time Bridie’s heart rate slowed and her oxygen saturations dipped. The situation was worsening.
‘We need to secure her airway,’ Rilla said, ignoring the frantic beat of her heart as she handed the laryngoscope, endotracheal tube and other equipment to Henry. One of the junior nurses was drawing up some intubation drugs.
‘Brenda, go put out a code blue page,’ Rilla ordered as Henry prepared to intubate. His hand shook and Rilla had the awful feeling he was going to foul it up.
Intubating a child or baby was always a little fraught, but in an emergency and for the first time? She knew Henry had to be feeling the pressure. Better to get as many medical people as possible down here so someone more experienced could take over. Hell, she’d ring the chief of staff, if she had to. Her father may not have had recent clinical experience but she’d bet her last cent he could intubate Bridie with his eyes closed.
Beth was crying and clutching at Rilla’s uniform, begging them both to do something as alarms shrilled all around them. Damn it! Rilla felt like her heart was being torn in two. She wanted to be over there comforting Beth but Bridie needed her too. At this moment even more than her sister.
‘Did you notify Gabe?’ Rilla asked as she administered the muscle-paralysis drug so Henry could pass the tube through Bridie’s vocal cords.
‘I paged him. He’s in Theatre. He didn’t want to go in today,’ Beth cried. ‘But he was fussing so much and it was only a short list. She wasn’t that bad this morning. I shouldn’t have made him go,’ she wailed.
‘It’s OK, Beth,’ Rilla assured her, her pulse rate skyrocketing as Henry attempted to insert the endotracheal tube. ‘I’ll send someone for him, I promise. Let’s just do this first, OK? It’s going to be fine. Nearly done.’
Only Rilla knew it wasn’t. Knew Henry was having trouble, and as she saw Bridie’s saturations plummet and her heart rate drop, she knew he was going to have to stop, re-oxygenate and try again.
‘Do you want me to give some atropine?’ she prompted Henry, and gave it when he nodded.
‘Oh God,’ Beth cried.
Where was the team? It seemed like an hour but in reality it had only been a minute. Satisfied that Bridie’s heart rate had stabilised and that Henry had control of the airway, Rilla made a decision.
‘I’ll be back in two seconds,’ she announced.
‘Ril, no! Where are you going?’ Beth demanded, her voice raising several octaves.
Rilla turned and looked at her sister. She grabbed her arms and gave them a gentle squeeze. ‘I’m going to call Dad.’
Beth’s face crumpled. ‘OK.’
Rilla paced out of the resus area into the corridor. Taking a couple of deep cleansing breaths, her hands shaking, she headed for the nearest phone. Before she could pick it up, her gaze met Luca’s.
‘Rilla? What’s wrong,’ he demanded, striding towards her. She looked like hell. Pale and shaken and about two seconds away from collapsing.
‘Luca. Thank God,’ Rilla said, putting her hand out to steady herself on his outstretched arm. She knew he wasn’t officially at work yet but she didn’t care. Bridie’s life depended on him. She’d never been more pleased to see him. Not even in the bush ten days ago. ‘I need you. It’s Bridie.’
Luca didn’t ask any questions, just followed her brisk lead. He listened as she prattled off the details and he swore under his breath as his sharp gaze took in the situation in the resus area.
‘Luca,’ Beth sobbed. ‘Oh, Luca.’
Luca gave Beth’s hands a brief squeeze before muscling a relieved Henry aside and with Rilla’s assistance slid the endotracheal tube past the vocal cords and into the trachea in one smooth movement.
‘It’s OK now, Beth,’ Luca soothed, as he held the tube with one hand and bagged with the other while Rilla, hands still shaking, secured the tube with brown tape. ‘She’s going to be OK. We won’t let anything happen to our little bush baby.’
Julia and Karen arrived in the resus bay, along with a PICU consultant, just as Rilla was satisfied the tube was secure. Luca and Henry filled in the details and Rilla was pleased to let them take over so she could comfort her sister. So she could be a worried aunt.
‘Come on out with me,’ Rilla encouraged. ‘Bridie’s in good hands. She’ll be up in ICU before you know it.’
‘No,’ Beth shook her head vigorously, wiping at her eyes with her hands. ‘I can’t leave her.’
Rilla nodded, knowing if it was her baby she wouldn’t be able to either. ‘I’ll ring Dad. We’ll get him to go and talk to Gabe.’
‘Oh God, Gabe.’ Beth dissolved into more tears.
‘Shush,’ Rilla soothed, rubbing Beth’s arm. ‘He’ll be here soon.’
Rilla didn’t even get three paces out of the resus bay before the enormity of the situation overwhelmed her. She groped for a nearby wall and sagged against it. Her breath hurt in her chest and tears stung her eyes as visions of her niece’s still body and pale lips replayed in her head. The what-ifs were crippling.
‘Rilla?’
She looked up to find Luca standing in front of her, his gaze gentle, a frown marring his forehead. She sucked in some much-needed air.
‘Are you OK, cara?’
Rilla nodded her head vigorously as his quiet endearment brought her perilously close to breaking down. She breathed in and out a few more times, grabbing at the sharp pain in her side. ‘I’ll be OK.’ Her voice was shaky and she knew it. ‘I was just … It was just …’
Luca nodded. She didn’t have to explain. ‘I know.’
They looked at each other for a few seconds. ‘I don’t know how to thank you. You’ve come to the rescue twice now with Bridie.’
Luca shrugged. ‘She’s my niece too.’
Rilla felt her eyes widen, a storm of emotions battering her already precarious state. Did he think he could waltz back in after all this time and play happy families with her? Why was he here? What did he want? Damn him! She didn’t have time for this now.
‘I … I have to call my father.’
He nodded. ‘You sure you’ll be OK?’
Rilla nodded back.
‘I’ll go and check how things are going.’
When Rilla re-entered Resus a few minutes later, Luca was holding a sobbing Beth and Rilla’s heart did a triple back somersault with a twist. He looked so big and manly, stroking her sister’s head. So like the old Luca. The one she’d fallen in love with. Not like the distant, workaholic stranger he’d become after the miscarriage.
‘Dad’s finding Gabe,’ Rilla said as she approached.
‘Oh, thank you,’ Beth said, her voice strained with emotion. ‘Look at me.’ Beth blew her nose. ‘I must be such a mess. So much for the capable nurse. I just fell apart.’
‘Of course you did,’ Rilla soothed. ‘She’s your baby.’
‘They think it’s RSV,’ Beth said, her voice thick with emotion and the remnants of her cold. ‘They say she’ll be tu-tubed for a few days.’ Beth broke down again and this time sought comfort in her sister’s arms.
‘Beth?’
Rilla looked up to find her father and an ashen-faced Gabe, still in his scrubs, staring at his daughter, who looked increasingly small amongst all the medical equipment that Julia, Karen and the ICU doctor and nurse kept adding. Beth ran straight into his arms, sobbing loudly. ‘I’m so sorry, Gabe. It all happened so fast.’
‘Shh,’ he soothed. ‘She’s in good hands now.’
‘How are you, darling?’
John Winters embraced his middle daughter.
‘I’ve been better.’ Rilla hugged her father. ‘Thank goodness for Luca being around. He was …’ her eyes met Luca’s over her father’s shoulder ‘… magnificent.’
It was true. He’d been calm and focused under pressure. He’d been exactly what Bridie had needed. What she’d needed—again. Their gazes locked.
John moved out of Rilla’s embrace and shook his son-in-law’s hand. ‘Thank you, Luca. Again.’
Minutes later Bridie was attached to the transport ventilator and was ready to move up to PICU.
‘Julia, I know we’re frantic but—’
‘Go,’ Julia ordered Rilla with a dismissive wave of her hand. ‘Of course you must go. Don’t worry about us. We’ll be fine. Just look after that niece of yours. And your sister.’
Rilla gave her boss a hug. Deserting her post on a frantic day was not going to win any brownie points for the NUM job but it was moments like these that put trifling things like jobs firmly into perspective, and Julia understood that family came first. It was why she was leaving her beloved post, uprooting her kids and following her husband and his new job to Canada.
Luca accompanied them, down corridors and up lifts, walking silently beside Rilla. Ahead Gabe and Beth huddled together, seeking comfort and support from each other and Rilla yearned to be able to do the same with Luca. She was so worried about Bridie, she could feel a knot in the pit of her stomach the size of a cricket ball and her legs felt like a dubious support. Once she would have leant on Luca automatically. But so much had changed.
The ICU nurse asked them all to wait in the parents’ lounge, promising to get them as soon as they had Bridie settled.
‘You don’t have to stay,’ Rilla said quietly as Luca took a seat next to her. He’d removed his tie and undone the top two buttons and she quashed the stupid urge to crawl onto his lap.
He turned and looked at her. ‘I’m staying.’
Rilla swallowed, absurdly happy by his insistence. She shouldn’t be. She should be angry. Why hadn’t he offered this level of support when she’d needed it seven years ago? Instead, he had thrown himself into his work, grown away from her. As had she. Too ill equipped to deal with the tragic end to a fledgling pregnancy so early in their relationship.
But he was here now, all solid and silent and dependable, and as confusing as it was, she’d take it for the moment. Because Bridie was by no means out of the woods and Luca had always made her feel like she could cope with anything when he was by her side. Well, for a while, anyway.
An increasingly fretting Beth and Gabe were ushered inside twenty minutes later. Given that they were all on staff at the hospital and the patient was the chief of staff’s granddaughter, the unit’s policy of only two visitors at a time could no doubt have been bent, but Rilla knew her sister and brother-in-law needed time by themselves with Bridie.
A frantic Hailey arrived, followed closely by Penny Winters.
‘Darling. What happened? How is she? Oh, poor Beth,’ Penny gabbled.
John embraced his wife. ‘She’s ventilated. They think she has a respiratory infection. We don’t know much more than that at the moment.’
Penny held her arms out to her daughters and Rilla and Hailey embraced their mother. ‘She’ll be fine, Mum,’ Rilla assured her.
‘Has anyone contacted David?’ Hailey asked.
They all looked at each other. ‘Damn! No.’ John shook his head and flipped open his mobile phone. ‘I’ll do it now.’
‘David?’ Luca murmured to Rilla as he watched John leave the room.
‘Beth’s son.’
Luca frowned. ‘The one she put up for adoption when she was fifteen? Just before your parents fostered her?’
Rilla nodded, not surprised that he’d remembered. He had been very close to her family. ‘He found her earlier this year.’
‘That’s wonderful,’ Luca enthused quietly. ‘Beth must have been ecstatic.’
Rilla swallowed a lump, thinking about all the things he’d missed out on. The things they could have shared, that he could have been part of. ‘She was.’
Another hour passed while the family waited. The television was on in the background, a welcome distraction, but no one could really concentrate on it for any length of time. They made idle chit-chat, all the time on tenterhooks.
Luca looked at his watch. It was two o’clock. He saw the strain and felt the tension in the room and felt as helpless as the rest of the Winters family. Whether he wanted it or not, he and Bridie were connected.
And not just because she was his estranged wife’s niece but because he’d been at her birth. Had put a tube in her throat today to save her life. After seven years of silence he wasn’t sure if he belonged here any more, amongst this shocked family, but he felt compelled to stay anyway.
Not just for him but for Rilla. OK, he’d come back to give himself some closure, to prove he was over her and sign the divorce papers, but Rilla was in the midst of a crisis and nothing else mattered for the moment other than Bridie getting well.
‘I’m going to go and get us all some lunch,’ he announced, standing and stretching.
He returned fifteen minutes later with a variety of prepackaged sandwiches, muffins, chocolate bars and a tray full of cappuccinos. Gabe entered the room as the food was being devoured. They all stood.
‘How is she?’ John asked.
‘Her condition is still unstable. Her blood gases are terrible and they keep escalating her ventilation. They’ve had to keep her paralysed to ventilate her adequately.’
Gabe’s voice cracked and they all crowded closer, touching his arm, rubbing his back and hugging him.
‘How’s Beth?’ Luca asked.
Gabe rubbed his eyes. ‘Terrible. She’s exhausted. Bridie hasn’t been sleeping or feeding well the last few nights because of the cold, so Beth’s pretty sleep deprived on top of being scared out of her mind.’
‘Has she eaten?’ Rilla asked.
Gabe shook his head. ‘I’ve tried to persuade her to come out and have some lunch but she’s adamant she’s fine.’
‘Right.’ Rilla nodded. ‘You sit and have something to eat and I’ll see if I can persuade her. Bossy sister might work better.’
Gabe nodded. ‘Thank you.’
Rilla was stopped at the door by Luca’s. ‘Do you want company?’
She looked back over her shoulder. The thought of seeing Bridie so ill was sickening and she was surprised at how very, very much she did want Luca with her. ‘Two at a time. That’s the rules,’ she pointed out.
‘Forget the rules,’ Luca said, striding towards her.
They spoke briefly with the ICU doctor who had helped earlier before going into Bridie’s isolation room. Beth looked dreadful, her face puffy, her hair rumpled. Rilla hugged her and Beth’s face crumpled.
‘She’s getting worse,’ she sobbed into Rilla’s shoulder.
‘Shh,’ Rilla crooned. ‘The doctor was just saying they’ve confirmed it’s RSV. You know they always get worse before they get better.’
Rilla looked at her niece lying in the warming cot, wires criss-crossing her tiny body like railway tracks. The monitor displayed multicoloured squiggles representing heart rate and blood pressure as well as respiratory rate and oxygen saturations.
