Destination Thailand

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I flinched at that comment. It was one hundred percent true of course but it still stung that I hadn’t been more independent in my twenty-eight years. I’d never have been accepted into Destiny’s Child, I was a let-down as a Spice Girls fan. ‘I’ll be fine, Mum. People say you should treat strangers as friends you haven’t met yet.’ I tried to ignore the thought of the pulsating vein on the left side of her temple that would be throbbing at this conversation.

‘Yes, but they also say one in three murder victims know their killer,’ she blustered. ‘You know this world is a dangerous place and all me and your father have ever wanted was to keep you safe. We can’t do that from the other side of the world. I’ll not be able to sleep a wink every night you’re away – have you thought about that?’

‘Actually, Mum, I want to think about myself. Just me, for once in my life.’ There was silence on the line. Immediately I regretted biting her head off.

‘Well…well, OK then. I just hope for your sake you don’t end up regretting this silly holiday. Anyway, I need to go.’ With that she hung up, leaving me breathless, staring into the white noise in shock.

I hadn’t heard from her since then, but my dad had been sending me the odd secretive supportive text message. #DON’T WORRY ABOUT YOUR MUM. YOU GO FOR IT KIDDO. LOL. He clearly didn’t know what a hashtag was but the thought was there, in all its shouty glory.

‘You nervous about tomorrow then?’ Marie asked in the taxi as we made our way to the Chinese restaurant.

‘Yeah.’ I pulled a face. ‘A little! Although I think I’m more excited than terrified.’

‘I bet! Excited about all the hot men you’re going to meet?’ She winked and passed Cole his Sophie the giraffe toy he’d chucked on the floor.

‘Is that all you think about?’ I rolled my eyes. I don’t know what was with Marie but at the moment she was like a dog on heat, more obsessed with men than I’d ever seen her before.

‘Not all I think about.’ She stuck her tongue out which made Cole laugh. ‘But you must have imagined the tanned hunks, from all over the world, that will be backpacking too? You have to admit that there’s something sexy about a guy going off to explore the world, to face the unknown, unafraid of challenges and obstacles in his path,’ she sighed. ‘So manly and adventurous.’

‘Like Stevie,’ I said before clapping my hand to my mouth stopping myself. Where had that come from?!

‘Stevie?’ Marie turned to face me. ‘Who’s Stevie?’ Her eyes were glowing with excitement.

I shook my head quickly. ‘Forget I said it.’ I blushed.

‘Err, come on! Out with it, if you’re keeping some man gossip from me, Miss Green, I swear I’ll make you walk the rest of the way there.’

‘OK, OK! But listen, I’m sorry to disappoint you but there’s no gossip. I don’t even know anything about him.’ She looked confused.

‘OMG, wait, are you online dating! Swiping left on Tinder?’ she gushed excitedly getting her phone out of her handbag.

‘No!’ I shuddered at the thought. ‘Stevie’s the godson of Trisha, you know the lovely lady I booked my tour with?’ Marie nodded. ‘Anyway, in her shop I’d seen these postcards from, like, all over the world and I read one.’

Marie looked visibly deflated. ‘Postcards?’

‘Yeah, from all these cool places. Anyway, I read one by accident and he just sounded so lovely and like you said, adventurous, caring, kind, exciting.’ I pulled myself to a stop and cleared my throat. Marie was now staring quizzically at me with a sly smile on her bright fuchsia pink lips. ‘I just have this image in my head of the type of man this Stevie is. The type of guy that I guess in the future, I’d like to be with.’ I closed my eyes wincing, waiting for the moment that she burst into a fit of laughter, but she stayed silent. Squinting one eye open Marie was looking at me, but not with a what-a-ridiculous-stupid-idea type look but more an understanding yeah-I-get-it type look. ‘It’s crazy isn’t it?’

Marie shook her head, her recently tonged vibrant red curls dancing about. ‘No, not crazy. Inspiring. It’s good that you’re thinking about the future, about guys again – ’

‘Loooooooonnnnnng into the future,’ I interrupted her.

‘Yeah, OK, long into the future. But still, this is a positive sign, hun.’ I smiled, realising this was one of many reasons she was my best friend. Having a crush – was that what this was? –on a guy I’d never met, wasn’t that strange to her. ‘And you never know, maybe you’ll bump into this Stevie when you’re away, get married on some exotic beach, have a ton of kids and live happily ever after.’

I scoffed. ‘Yeah and maybe one day you’ll realise that Mike is the one for you.’

She busied herself with Cole’s car seat straps, ignore my teasing. ‘Mmm. Right. Here we are.’ Saved by the bell or what.

‘Err, you don’t get out of it that easy, Marie. One day you’re going to realise that I’m right and I don’t want you to be heartbroken if that day’s too late for Mike to still be waiting for you,’ I said. Maybe a bit harsh but true.

‘Georgia. I’m fine.’ She patted her hand on mine. ‘Like I’ve told you a million times before, me and Mike just won’t work. We had Cole, had some fun but that’s it. I’m having way too much fun being single for all that anyway.’ She wafted her hand away. ‘You’ll see!’ She took a note out of her purse to pay the driver. I knew her well enough to know when she was telling the truth but kidding herself at the same time. Maybe that was what all this sudden infatuation with other men was about, she didn’t want to admit her true feelings for the father of her child. ‘Now come on, we’ve got a leaving party to enjoy!’

Since arriving at the almost empty restaurant neither myself nor my parents had mentioned the argument, an unspoken ceasefire had been called for my last night with them all. Marie had surprised me with a pair of sunglasses, a cheap wind-up torch and a hand-drawn card from Cole that my parents cooed over. Mum and Dad gave me an envelope stuffed with Thai baht and a rape alarm which, when they had tested it prior to arriving here, had almost given my mum a heart attack. I guessed that this was their olive branch.

‘I also wanted to give you this, pet.’ My dad rummaged into his jeans pocket bringing out a small brown envelope and passing it over to me.

‘You’ve all given me enough. I honestly didn’t expect any presents.’

‘I think you’ll like this,’ he grinned. I tipped the contents of the package into my hand and out fell a thin silver chain with an engraved solid disc in the centre. ‘It’s a St Christopher, the Patron Saint of Travellers,’ he explained. ‘My father gave it to me when I went off for my brief travels. It’s meant to give the wearer good luck and protection.’

‘Wow…thanks.’ I squeezed his hand as Marie leaned over to fix the clasp around my neck.

My dad winked, before clearing his throat. ‘It suits you, Georgie. I know you’ve promised us you’ll be safe but this is just a little extra protection,’ he sniffed.

‘Thank you. Dad, this is a good thing, a start of something new. I promise I’ll be careful and as soon as I can, I’ll be in touch. You won’t even notice I’ve gone.’

He ruffled my hair: ‘You know we love you so much. We’re very proud of you and just want you to have the time of your life. Lord knows, if I was your age I’d be doing exactly the same.’

‘Now, now, that’s enough emotion,’ my mum cut in briskly. ‘Ooh, look! Fortune cookies.’

The smiling waitress placed a small bowl of strawberry ice cream in front of Cole with four cookies wrapped in shiny plastic for the adults. We each picked one and tore off the berry-red foil.

‘“May the sun shine to light your way,”’ Marie read out, impersonating ‘Mystic Meg’. ‘Well I hope so, as I wouldn’t see a bloody thing in the dark.’

‘Oh, like those poor Norwegians,’ my mum said sympathetically.

‘No dear, they can still walk about, it’s just that in the north in winter they have less sunlight than us,’ my dad corrected her, laughing. ‘Who even writes these stupid sayings? Right – “Be bold, for those who have valour will fight to victory.” Well, it has been a very tough battle with my clematis bush…but I think I may have won,’ he smiled.

One of the few things that Dad seemed to have found enjoyment in since taking early retirement was pottering around in his small, but impeccable garden. Every time I visited he would pop on his yellow crocs, which my mum had picked up from the market, convinced they were très chic, and proudly show me his newly-laid flower beds, or organic fertiliser that they’d splashed out on at Homebase when it had been on special offer. ‘That’ll make all the difference,’ he’d said, pointing his head towards the bag of manure, nodding wisely.

‘My turn.’ My mum had torn off the wrapper and put her reading glasses on to squint at the tiny letters. ‘“A bad word uttered once will always be repeated twice.” Oh, I bet that means Viv from number twenty-three has been gossiping about my hanging baskets again. She even has her eye on my hydrangeas, but I swore I’d never reveal my secret for their growth.’

‘Right, your go,’ Marie said wiping Cole’s mouth. She gave me a look that said move on from this green-fingered conversation before she jabbed a fork in her eye. I smiled and carefully pulled out the crisp cookie and snapped it in two.

But it was empty.

I dug my fingernails into each crevice and then smashed it completely, just in case the paper strip had become lodged in the side. But there was nothing…I had no fortune.

‘Oh my God. I have no fortune, no future! This cannot be a good omen, seeing as I’m getting on that flight tomorrow.’ I felt like I was hyperventilating. My dad rummaged through the crumbs, my mum shot evil looks at him for having booked this restaurant and told me to calm down. Marie was trying to catch the waiter’s attention for another cookie, or the bill, or a strong drink, whichever arrived first.

‘Don’t panic. I’m sure there was just a mistake in the manufacturing. Isn’t that right, Len?’ my mum snapped at my dad who offered to give me his fortune cookie before Cole grasped his pink chubby fingers around the paper slip.

‘It’s all a load of nonsense anyway. Don’t get worked up about it, pet,’ he said pulling the paper from Cole’s mouth causing him to cry grumpily. I was still trying to find my breath when a shot of something clear and pungent was placed in front of me by a smiling waitress, who was completely unaware of the drama that had occurred.

‘Drink this,’ Marie ordered. I downed the acrid-tasting alcohol in one. As the liquid burned my throat, I started to relax. Maybe they were right; it was just a cock-up in the production line. It wasn’t as if anyone had taken it out before they gave it to me. We each picked our own cookie. But I knew I was trying to think positively when I glanced at their worried faces as the bill arrived.

Crap. I have no fortune.

If I could have gone back in time, I would have asked the waitress for another cookie, because what really lay in store for me couldn’t have been thought up in some Chinese printing factory.

*

Having never flown anywhere on my own before, a mixture of excitement, fear and hope grew in my stomach. Everything was a novelty – from the complimentary drinks, to the ridiculous number of films to choose from on the small screen in the seatback in front, to the scratchy, free blanket and cotton eye mask. I arrived in Dubai six hours later where I had a couple of hours to kill before transferring to the next flight on to Bangkok. Following the throng of passengers through this gigantic airport was overwhelming; this place was off-the-scale huge. I felt like Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone 2