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What Tears Us Apart
What Tears Us Apart
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What Tears Us Apart

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What Tears Us Apart
Deborah Cloyed

Love lives in the most dangerous places of the heart The real world. That’s what Leda desperately seeks when she flees her life of privilege to travel to Kenya. She finds it at a boys' orphanage in the slums of Nairobi. What she doesn’t expect is to fall for Ita, the charismatic and thoughtful man who gave up his dreams to offer children a haven in the midst of turmoil.Their love should be enough for one another—it embodies the soul-deep connection both have always craved. But it is threatened by Ita’s troubled childhood friend, Chege, a gang leader with whom he shares a complex history. As political unrest reaches a boiling point and the slum erupts in violence, Leda is attacked…and forced to put her trust in Chege, the one person who otherwise inspires anything but.In the aftermath of Leda’s rescue, disturbing secrets are exposed, and Leda, Ita and Chege are each left grappling with their own regret and confusion. Their worlds upturned, they must now face the reality that sometimes the most treacherous threat is not the world outside, but the demons within

Love lives in the most dangerous places of the heart

The real world. That’s what Leda desperately seeks when she flees her life of privilege to travel to Kenya. She finds it at a boys’orphanage in the slums of Nairobi. What she doesn’t expect is to fall for Ita, the charismatic and thoughtful man who gave up his dreams to offer children a haven in the midst of turmoil.

Their love should be enough for one another—it embodies the soul-deep connection both have always craved. But it is threatened by Ita’s troubled childhood friend, Chege, a gang leader with whom he shares a complex history. As political unrest reaches a boiling point and the slum erupts in violence, Leda is attacked…and forced to put her trust in Chege, the one person who otherwise inspires anything but.

In the aftermath of Leda’s rescue, disturbing secrets are exposed, and Leda, Ita and Chege are each left grappling with their own regret and confusion. Their worlds upturned, they must now face the reality that sometimes the most treacherous threat is not the world outside, but the demons within.

What Tears us Apart

Deborah Cloyed

www.mirabooks.co.uk (http://www.mirabooks.co.uk)

To debianca, and redbird.

Contents

Newswire (#u5247e091-367e-5830-98a1-c2e8e48c91c6)

Prologue (#u39627649-affc-5267-8931-0c7d637151ce)

Chapter 1 (#ua5fb53d2-acad-54a2-bf8d-21916aa35f24)

Chapter 2 (#u9b919efa-15f2-5cca-bd48-8992d81bd616)

Chapter 3 (#u2fa35e8f-665b-5eb0-8a4c-0662bac099a1)

Chapter 4 (#uc92ecd3c-bd90-5014-8041-3942595dcd9c)

Chapter 5 (#u0b1c82e0-2fab-50b5-974f-e68052220d50)

Chapter 6 (#ua217717d-2d83-519a-a886-cd5f22256db4)

Chapter 7 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 8 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 9 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 10 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 11 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 12 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 13 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 14 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 15 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 16 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 17 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 18 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 19 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 20 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 21 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 22 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 23 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 24 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 25 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 26 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 27 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 28 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 29 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 30 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 31 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 32 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 33 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 34 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 35 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 36 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 37 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 38 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 39 (#litres_trial_promo)

Chapter 40 (#litres_trial_promo)

Acknowledgments (#litres_trial_promo)

Teaser (#litres_trial_promo)

Questions for Discussion (#litres_trial_promo)

A Conversation with Deborah Cloyed (#litres_trial_promo)

Newswire America: December 31, 2007

NAIROBI, Kenya — Incumbent President Mwai Kibaki was hastily sworn in yesterday, beating out Raila Odinga in Kenya’s heated election. Allegations of fraud sparked violence countrywide.

In Kibera, one of the world’s largest slums and Raila Odinga’s stronghold, thousands flooded the streets, bearing rocks and machetes, chanting, “No Raila, no peace!”

Members of Raila’s Luo tribe lashed out at their Kikuyu neighbors—the tribe associated with Kibaki—setting shops and homes aflame. The Mungiki, Kenya’s notorious Kikuyu mafia, retaliated, riots escalating into a rape and murder spree. By midnight, smoke blanketed Kibera, flames licked the sky, and mutilated bodies littered the roads as screams rang out from every corner of the slum....

Prologue

December 30, 2007, Kibera—Leda

NO. PLEASE. PLEASE, world, God, fate, don’t let this happen.

Each man’s hands on Leda’s skin are like desert sand. Hot. Gritty. Rough as splinters of glass.

She ricochets around their circle, a lotto ball in the air mix machine, fate holding its breath. Behind the lunging silhouettes of the men, the slum explodes—fire licking and climbing, spitting at the world. There’s another sound, too, mixed with the whooshing sound of the inferno. Wood, metal, bodies—all crumbling, cracking, hissing and screaming in the flames. It is a symphony of loss.

The men, who are boys really, they yell incomprehensibly, but Leda knows their intentions.

They rip the buttons on her shirt.

They yank the hem of her skirt.

A cloud of reddish dust rises from their feet, as though trying to hide her. But the dust dashes away when Leda is flung to the ground.

For a moment nothing happens.

Then it’s like vampires at the sight of a wound. The men converge—kicking, poking, laughing. They tug at all her protruding parts. Leda’s a centipede in the dust, trying to fold in one hundred legs. Trying to protect the things that matter, things that cannot be undone.

Maybe they will just beat me and go away. This is not my fight. I came to help. Leda wants to shout in their faces. I came to help.

But then she hears it, jumbled with the clatter of their words. Ita. Another one says it. Ita.

So they know who she is.

She is a fish flopping, a tree fallen. A spider in the wind.

She is Ita’s love.

For an instant, Leda thinks it will save her. But as their voices rise, she knows it has doomed her instead.

When the boy drops down on top of her, the force of it is like a metal roof pinning her in a hurricane.

Instantly, all Leda smells is him—sweat and dirt, but rancid, like musk and cheese rusted over with blood. He uses his trunk to flatten her into the ground, his rib bones stabbing into her sternum, her bare skin grinding into the rocks and trash. His legs and hands scramble for Leda’s flailing limbs. The man-boys above laugh and holler.

All she can do is flail and scream.

Leda calls out for the man she loves, the only person who’s ever really loved her.

But it’s the devil who arrives instead.

Ita’s beloved monster, Chege.

Chege’s voice arrives first—a low growl, a familiar snarl. It is the battle cry of an unchained wolf, at home in the darkest of times.

Chege is above her. His dreads close over Leda and her attacker, a curtain of night.

“Help me,” Leda says. Did Ita send him?

As Leda tries to decipher Chege’s spitting words, he yanks the man off and her body takes a breath. The rancid smell, his clawing zipper, the pain in her lungs—it all disappears into the racket above and for one second Leda feels light as a sparrow in the sky. She allows herself to breathe. There is mercy in Chege’s heart after all. He will save her. At least for Ita’s sake.

But then Chege’s eyes flicker, a flap of emotion like blinds shuttering daylight. His hand shoots down and wraps around her throat, a coiling python, and Leda’s breath is lost. His other hand snaps the necklace from her neck. The gold necklace Ita gave her, the sacred chain that is everything to him.

This, Chege knows better than anyone.

He stares at the necklace in his fingers, his eyes bulging, and Leda knows the truth. Chege’s heart isn’t merciful, it’s a furnace of coal that burns only with rage. When both his hands pull Leda up by the throat, the glint of the gold chain taunts her, the shiny sparrow charm a spark in her peripheral vision as the necklace drops to the dirt.

Up, up through the dust, Chege brandishes her like a chunk of meat.

He’s claimed her. Head wolf gets the kill.

His eyes dart about. Leda sees it when he does—a door ajar. He smiles, baring his brown teeth.

Faster than she can scream, Chege kicks her feet to knock her off balance, then drags her across the alley, to the open door. The boys lap at their heels, eyes ravenous. Behind them, the fire rolls atop the mud shacks like a river of exploding stars.

Maybe they will burn for this. Maybe we all will.

Chege yanks her into the dark room, kicks the door shut, and all light goes out in the world.

Chapter 1

November 14, 2007, Topanga, CA—Leda

LEDA SAT IN the sun, feeling judged by the mountains.