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She was clinging to the hope of a plan, but it didn’t have anything to do with spending unnecessary time with Tucker McDermott.
As a matter of fact, the less time she spent around him, the better.
* * *
“Hey, you want me to show you how to rope?”
Tucker took a swig of his iced tea. The cold, sweet liquid did nothing to cool the burning tension in the pit of his stomach as Abe gave Caleb an angry glare. Caleb was trying to pull Abe out of his shell, but the boy wasn’t interested. Fortunately, the boys of Sunrise Ranch were used to this kind of behavior and had probably been on the giving end when they’d first arrived at the ranch, alone, lost and feeling as if their world had come to an end.
The emotions that warred behind Abe’s chilly blue gaze were not uncommon.
Tucker’s dad always halted chores and school and held some small welcome event for each boy upon his arrival, to showcase the fun that was in store for him. This helped ease their transition and break them into life on the ranch by snagging their interest.
During the mini rodeo for Abe and Suzie, Tucker spent time explaining what each event was to Abe. Though the kid hadn’t joined in on the conversation, the fact that he’d listened was a plus, and Tucker believed he was interested.
When the rodeo was over, Nana called everyone to the chow hall, where they’d decided to have their first meal with Suzie and Abe. Sometimes Nana would have the guests and all the boys over at the house, but it was a rowdy event and they’d decided it would be better to eat in the chow hall. It would be good for Suzie to see where Abe would be having his meals during school hours. Abe would eat supper at the ranch house with Suzie and Nana, since the boys ate their evening meal with their house parents at the two foster homes on the ranch.
Tucker had given Suzie some space not long after the mini rodeo started, staying out of her way for a couple of hours. She was clearly not comfortable around him, and so he’d let his dad and his grandmother and his other family members try to put her at ease. His brother Morgan was there with his wife, Jolie, who was the teacher of the school. And his youngest brother, Rowdy, was there also, though his fiancée, Lucy, was at an art show in New York and couldn’t make it. Everyone had tried hard to make Suzie and Abe feel welcome and she’d seemed to respond well with them. Even seemed to relax and he’d thought some of the tension had eased from her eyes.
But dinner was over now. Pans of homemade lasagna and Nana’s handmade rolls had been devoured and only the crumbs remained. The huge bowls of her cream-cheese banana pudding slathered in whipped cream were practically licked clean. And the boys were walking around smacking their lips in satisfaction.
His nana knew how to make boys happy. She gave them plenty of love and nurturing, and filled them with the best food in Texas, and plenty of it.
As the sun started to dip under the horizon, he knew it was time to talk; he’d put it off as long as possible.
Suzie and Nana were on the porch, and as he walked over he forced the nerves rattling around in his gut like barbed wire to go away. He’d faced more than his share of danger, and yet facing Suzie made him feel like a coward.
“I hate to interrupt, but, Suzie, could we take a walk? I think it would be a good idea for us to discuss a few things.”
She minded. It was written clearly in her eyes.
“No, not at all. If you’ll excuse me, Nana, Tucker is right. We need to talk.”
Nana squeezed Suzie’s arm. “You go along, dear. When you get back I’ll show you upstairs to your room and you can get you and Abe settled into the ranch house.”
“Thanks. Thanks for everything.”
Nana waved off the gratitude. “You are family, just like Gordon was. My house is your house. Helping is what families do. Now go, it will do the two of you good to talk.”
There were kids all around the yard and the barn, and despite Abe’s reluctance to join in, Tony and Caleb, along with Jake, one of the newest teens, had gotten him to go to the stable to see the horses. Horses were always good for the boys.
“We can walk out to the school, if you’d like. I’m sure you’d like to see where Abe will be tomorrow.”
Placing her hand on her stomach, as if to calm her nerves, she nodded and fell into step with him.
In her running shoes, she came to just below his chin. So when she looked at him she was looking up slightly and it made her seem even more vulnerable than he knew she was.
“How’s Abe doing since we talked?” They’d had a couple of conversations on the phone prior to her move. She’d explained that she needed help, that Abe was hanging with a crowd of older boys who were constantly in trouble and that she was afraid for him. He’d heard the fear and distress in her voice over the long-distance line.
Two of the boys Abe had been hanging out with had just been sent to juvenile jail. Abe had been sneaking out at night, several times that she knew of, and he refused to tell her what he’d been doing. She’d called Tucker out of desperation and he knew it—because she blamed him for Gordon being dead. She’d made that clear when he’d gone to see her after being released from the hospital. She’d refused his help and refused to have anything to do with him.
Until now.
Her eyes flashed and he could have punched himself.
“You saw him,” she said tightly. “He’s like a bomb waiting to explode. He’s been that way since he lost his father. It’s just getting worse.” The accusation vibrated in her words and the vein in her throat beat so hard it was obvious that her blood pressure had skyrocketed. He hated that he’d done this. His own blood was pounding in his ears. He hadn’t been trained for this.
Silence stretched between them, the only sound the soft crunch of gravel as they followed the path across the pasture toward the school.
He started over. “What I meant to say was—how long after losing his father was it before he started hanging around this group of kids?”
Her shoulders slumped as she pushed her silky hair behind her ear. “It was about a year ago. We’d had a tough first year. Lots of tears and angry outbursts and sullenness. We saw a counselor, but Abe wouldn’t open up and eventually he refused to return. I should have found him another counselor—one he would talk to. I should have continued until I found the right one. But he refused and said if I took him to another one, he would run away. And I believed him.”
There was anguish in her voice and it tore at Tucker. He said a silent prayer that God would lead him in helping Suzie. His faith had been the strength that had sustained him through all of this. His faith that God would not let this family down.
“I understand. And after that?”
She took a deep breath. “After that, things went downhill. He started skipping school and sneaking out at night, even though he was barely thirteen. He was in detention much of the time. The school tried. They felt for him. He met one of these boys in detention. The other was a dropout.”
“You can’t blame yourself.”
She looked up at him. “I don’t.”
Her eyes were hard where he’d seen softness and love in the photos of her smiling at her husband. Tucker’s gut clenched and he felt like throwing up.
“At least I try not to. I blame the war. I blame you. Even though I know it’s unreasonable. I do. But still, I feel guilty because I couldn’t hold it together without Gordon. He was made of stauncher stuff. He believed in me. And in the end, I’ve let him down.” Tears were in her eyes. “He believed in you, too. And so I’ve come. Maybe his trust in you is worth more than his trust in me.”
Her throat worked as she tried not to cry. It was clear in her expression that she was fighting breaking down.
“No, it isn’t,” he offered bluntly, feeling awkward. How was he supposed to answer something like that? “I’m sure you’re probably exhausted from the move, too,” he said, when she looked away as if embarrassed that she was crying. It took everything Tucker had not to wipe away the tears trailing down her cheeks. He vowed he would fix this as best it could be fixed without Gordon rising from the dead.
She wiped away the tears herself and took a shuddering breath. He watched her stiffen her shoulders.
He cleared his own throat. “Your husband loved you more than life itself. It was evident to all who came within ten feet of him. Your picture was shown around more than a pinup, and he talked about how strong and good you were. He would never believe you let him down. You should know that.”
She looked away. “If we don’t find a way to save Abe from this destructive path he’s on, nothing else matters. Sunrise Ranch and you are my last hope.”
“We’ll all get through. This is a place of healing. My mother had a dream to see scared and scarred boys find a place to belong and mend. She knew...” He paused and looked across the pastures at the setting sun and the beauty surrounding them. When he looked back at Suzie she had followed his gaze and was staring toward the sunset, too.
“You’ve seen the boys who are here. They are happy, regular boys now. Yes, they have deep hurts and issues that they deal with, but we are their support group. Their family. Just as Gordon was part of our family. You saw some of that tonight with Nana. Even if no one else makes any headway with Abe, Nana and her food and love will smooth a path for others to reach him. It happens all the time.”
They started walking again. “She is wonderful.” There was wistful hope in her voice.
That breathless sound eased a knot slightly that had formed beneath his rib cage. They’d reached the school and stopped beside the porch. “She is,” he agreed. “So rest assured. And I promise it will work out. It may not be easy but Abe will be all right.” He’d never made promises he meant more than the ones he was making to Suzie.
Tucker prayed God’s plan and his plan were the same.
“Let me show you the school,” he said, opening the door. “It’s a simple three-room structure with restrooms.” They walked into the large, open room full of desks and bookshelves and exploding with color. “As you know, Jolie is the teacher. And she loves bright colors.”
She paused in the doorway, and her breath caught. “I love it! It radiates with happiness. Just like she does.”
Glad for something positive to latch on to, he smiled looking at some of the bulletin boards. “That’s true, Jolie is a very happy person and it shows. Jolie loves color and light. She had Rowdy’s fiancée, Lucy, paint the mural of the outdoor scene around the chalkboard.”
“I love that. It brings the outside in.”
He was feeling hopeful now, hearing the excitement in Suzie’s voice. “She loves the outdoors, and holds class outside a lot. At her request we added more picnic tables out back under the trees. She’s great.”
“She and Morgan were really nice at dinner. I heard the boys saying she was a champion kayaker.”
“Yes. World-class. But her heart is here now. The boys are enthralled with her.”
“I can see why. It’s rather intimidating to think about.”
“Tell me about it. I certainly don’t know how kayakers do what they do, and I don’t want to. But the boys like the idea that their teacher has an adventurous spirit. It helps her to be able to talk to them. Plus, she was raised here. Her parents were house parents, and she went to school here with me, Morgan and Rowdy, when the school first started. She has witnessed the power of Sunrise Ranch. She’ll be good for Abe.”
Suzie nodded. “I like that. This is certainly going to be different than the school he was attending.”
“We found having a smaller group setting was a better option for the boys here at the ranch. It will be good for Abe.” He prayed it was so.
He showed her the rest of the school, then took her out back to the picnic tables and swings that sat beneath the oak trees. A breeze rustled through the leaves, and the sunset had turned into a pink glow, making a beautiful horizon.
Suzie turned to him. “Thank you for agreeing to do this.”
He could tell that was costing her. What must she feel about him behind those beautiful, sad eyes?
Tucker yanked his thoughts back. He had a good head on his shoulders. He knew how to handle tough situations and make clear decisions under stressful ones. The emotions assaulting him as he stared into Suzie’s eyes were dangerous. Having a crush on the wife of the man whose death you felt responsible for just was not acceptable.
And if she even got a hint of what he was feeling, she would surely leave this ranch and never come back.
And he wouldn’t blame her at all.
Chapter Three
“Abe, can I come in?” Suzie asked, tapping softly on the door of his room. There was a muffled “Whatever” from the other side of the door, so she opened it. Abe was stretched out on the bed staring at the ceiling. The fluffy green bedspread made him seem small, even though she knew he was growing like a weed.
She walked across the room and sat down on the edge of the bed. He kept his gaze firmly locked on the ceiling, and didn’t even glance at her. Her fingers itched to push the lock of hair out of his eyes.
“I just wanted to tell you good-night.” She touched his arm gently, but he pulled away. The boy she’d glimpsed earlier on the road with the donkeys seemed like a dream gone away. As if she’d imagined him for a moment. “The boys seem nice. Tony and Caleb must be about your age, too.”
His jaw tightened. “They’re okay,” he said at last. “Now can I go to sleep?”
“Abe, I won’t have you being disrespectful,” she said, shaken by his coldness. His eyes suddenly glistened with unshed tears. Her heart broke one more time.... How could a heart break over and over again? How...? Dear God, help me. Help my son.
After a moment she stood, knowing that hugging him was asking too much.
“Abe, what happened to us—losing your father—that wasn’t fair. But life isn’t fair always. Your dad would want you to be happy. This ranch, these people. They made him happy. I just want you to give it all a chance.”
His gaze met hers finally, but only for a desolate moment, then he rolled over and turned his back to her.
“I love you, son.” It felt like she was saying the words to a brick wall. Her heart ached.
Abe’s going to be all right. I promise. Tucker’s words echoed through her thoughts and gave her strength.
Still, it took everything in her to stand up, walk out and close the door.
Tomorrow a new day would begin.
And Suzie was going to trust that it would be their new start. She was going to think positive and give it everything she had. For Abe.
* * *
The next morning, Suzie’s sense of hope continued to prevail as she drove into town. Abe had eaten a huge breakfast with the other boys—Nana relayed the info, because Suzie had forced herself not to hover. Not to go peek through the windows, either—though it was exactly what she wanted to do.
Sometimes a mother’s job was hard—stepping back was one of the harder things.
But when she’d walked across the hall to his room she’d been surprised to find him already up and dressed and she’d taken that as a great sign. He’d startled her more by revealing that he’d decided to help feed the horses.
Evidently he’d been invited to do so, and after a night of thinking about it, he’d decided to help. It was a positive start and Suzie, not knowing what to expect when she’d awakened that morning, was thrilled.
Now, heading into town, she found herself relaxing in the seat of her small car, which Tucker had unhitched from the moving truck the previous night. She had the truck for another day, so she was going to have to find a place to rent, though the McDermotts had assured her that she and Abe were welcome to stay as long as needed. And she was wondering if prolonging their stay for a little while might be a good thing, if spending mornings, days and nights there would put him more in the action for a little while.
There was an apartment on the second story of the building that housed the florist’s shop, but she’d been told it was in some disrepair. She wasn’t sure she wanted to live above the store, anyway—how good would that be for Abe? But it was an option.
For now, she’d use it to store her things until she decided what she wanted to do.
The town was darling. The four-story, redbrick Dew Drop Inn reigned supreme across from a quaint town park that was surrounded by four rows of small businesses. On the far corner across the street from the Dew Drop Inn was the Spotted Cow Café with a sunny yellow door and red geraniums. Like a welcome sign, it begged a person to come visit.
On the bench outside the newspaper office just down the street sat two older gentlemen who waved as she passed. They were whittling and added to the feeling that Mayberry had come to life. Suzie instantly imagined Sheriff Andy Taylor walking the streets—but then, Tucker McDermott’s image replaced the fictional sheriff’s image and Dew Drop seemed suddenly a little more exciting than Mayberry. Stop with that, already!
Pulling into the empty parking spot three doors down from the weathered church pew where the gentlemen were sitting, a wave of nerves suddenly attacked her like stinging bees.
The ugly chipped door of her new business was directly in front of her, kind of a toss-up between mud-brown and murky gray.
“First order of business,” she muttered. “Paint that door.”
To say it was bad was the understatement of the year. And hopefully not a foreshadowing of things to come once she opened it and stepped inside.
The two older men came hurrying down the sidewalk, their boots scuffing as they came.
“We’ve been expecting you this morning,” the taller one said, grinning wide. He looked as though he smiled often because of the crinkles around his pale green eyes. “We made sure and got here early, just so we could welcome you. Right, Drewbaker?”
“Right, Chili,” the other man agreed. “We usually show up in the afternoon after we get our cows fed, but we snuck away this morning.” He winked, making her chuckle at the pure teasing in his manner.
“Thank you so much for coming. I’m Suzie Kent.”
“Oh, we know who you are. But I’m Chili Crump and that’s Drewbaker Mackintosh.”
Mr. Mackintosh nodded. “We heard all about you buying the place from Joyce and Lester. Those two were so excited to hook a buyer, they told the world it had sold before the papers were signed.”
