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My Stockholm Syndrome
My Stockholm Syndrome
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My Stockholm Syndrome

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??I'll do you tonight,?? he promised, shoving me in the back.

I almost ran to the barracks. The rain was getting heavier. Streams of water ran down my face and into my eyes, hindering my vision. My jacket and jeans were soaked through and my boots were sloshing with water. Outcast's radio crackled behind me announcing the statistics: two targets had been caught in pit traps, and the snare traps remained undisturbed. The first thing I did when I crossed the threshold of the barracks was to look for Simon and when I found him, I was relieved: he was alive. Outcast chained me to the wall, giving me a nasty goodbye groping. I broke free from his hands. Simon jumped up, followed by Lesha, but I shook my head: don't mess with him.

??Wow, you have defenders here,?? chuckled Outcast and swung his rifle butt at Lesha. The boy jumped back in fear and the gamekeeper laughed again. ??Pussy!??

With the rifle on his shoulder, Outcast leisurely walked away and I looked around, counting the casualties. The Nigerians had lost Dayo, her mother was sobbing on her son's shoulder.

??The fucking prick didn't just shoot the girl, he raped her first,?? Snezhana shared the details. ??Yesterday Lila wouldn't let him, so this time he made sure he shot the girl in the legs first so she wouldn't run away.??

I could barely contain my gagging.

??Why are you telling me this???

??Do you think it's easy to keep it to yourself??? Snezhana sobbed hysterically.

??So you… saw it!???

I threw up after all, barely making it to the bathroom in time. And then I sobbed under the cold shower for a long time, washing the vomit out of my hair.

The gamekeepers kept bringing in the rest of the survivors, and I kept adding up the bloody results. The Russian, Egor, had been killed. The knife didn't help him after all. And another Mexican, Roberto. A Vietnamese couple who irritated us with their wailing. And Barty wasn't back yet, but they were probably still looking for him. We stubbornly pushed away the thought that he was gone.

??Maybe he fell into one of the traps.?? I suggested.

But this version didn't bear out. The last to be brought to the barracks were two Germans mutilated by the traps: one had his hand cut off at the wrist and was cradling the stump in a bandage made from a T-shirt. The other was more fortunate, having only a minor injury on his hip. He collapsed on the bed right in his blood-soaked jeans. Barty was still gone, though. After counting the rest of the men, we realized he was sixth victim after all. Could a hunter have broken the rules?

We leaned against the windows, hoping to overhear something, but nobody mentioned a possible disqualification.

??Maybe he escaped after all??? Lesha said with hope.

Dinner was brought in. I hid in the bathroom as a precaution to avoid being seen by Outcast, but he either forgot about the threat or found a better option. After habitually separating the probable sedative-laden contents of the meal boxes, we ate, still not touching the bottles, preferring tap water.

For the rest of the day and the rest of the next, the guys and I discussed an escape plan.

??If Barty could do it, so can we,?? said Lesha.

I didn't try to dissuade him. Hope is not the worst incentive.

??Armand is not a problem for us, he only chooses strong and hardy targets,?? Simon said with an authoritative manner. ??Eric and his girlfriend hunt together, so we have to run in different directions and climb over the wall in different places. Our problem is Frost or the cowboy. I can't understand Frost's system, he's more into spontaneity, but the cowboy is only dangerous for you. You're the last pretty girl in the group.??

??Thanks, that's reassuring,?? I grimaced.

Lesha timidly put his hand on my shoulder.

??I… we won't let you get hurt,?? he promised, stammering. He blushed when I smiled back.

??Sweet couple,?? Snezhana passed by.

Without makeup on her face, she was surprisingly pretty. Or maybe the right mood had its effect. Snezhana had cheered up noticeably since last night when she was reunited with Diego. They were rather quiet during the night, but in the morning they activated the mode of non-stop sex with breaks for meals. Judging by the condition of the others, we were only given tranquilizers after the hunt and the following morning, because by evening the general lethargy usually disappeared. People lay down less and moved around more. Apparently, the hunters preferred cheerful targets.

In the morning we were escorted out of the barracks. Sandra, with a snarky smile, informed us that attempts to escape from the territory would be punished most severely. How, I wonder? Are they going to kill us twice? Then we saw Barty, or rather what was left of him in a clear plastic bag. Someone in the crowd threw up. Simon bellowed and rushed forward. I tried to hold him back. The gamekeepers drew their guns and the crowd went wild. Seeing Jason raise his gun, I kicked Simon under the knee with all my strength. He fell onto the ground.

??You can't help anyone this way!?? I vigorously shook him by the collar of his shirt. The only way to get revenge is to get out of here!??

The gamekeepers made their way through the crowd toward us. Jason roughly pulled me away from the raging Simon, throwing me to the ground and took aim. I squeezed my eyes shut, expecting the worst. The gamekeeper was going to pull the trigger and my friend would be gone.

??I'm ready to continue.??

Did that resolute voice belong to the freak from Massachusetts?

Jason put the gun down. I got up off the ground shaking the dirt off my knees, and when I straightened up, I saw the cowboy shifting his assessing gaze from Snezhana to me. I could tell by the greasy smile that Stu had finally made up his mind and that his choice left me no chance of survival.

??Ready… set… Go!??

The echoes of Sandra's shout were still in the air when I grabbed Simon's hand and dragged him into the woods. Lesha and his father were running beside us, but Andrei was gradually lagging behind.

??Don't patronize me,?? Simon shrugged off my hand. ??I can manage on my own.??

There was a loud click behind me, followed by a scream full of pain. A trap had been triggered. I turned around: Andrei was convulsing on the ground, trying to free his leg. Lesha stayed with his father trying to help him get out. The siren wailed. Here we go. After another half a mile, I stopped Simon by the sleeve.

??Time to split up,?? I nodded toward the wall. ??Run.??

??Better you!?? He still hesitated. ??You're a girl??.

??Exactly. That's why you have a better chance of getting out!?? I countered, forcefully pushing him away.

Simon darted to the side, and I sprinted forward, trying to run, making as much noise as I could to attract attention. Hopping over tree stumps and holes in the ground, cutting through the bushes, I was getting deeper into the woods, veering away from Simon's direction. I stopped to catch my breath, and then ran on again. I ran, and ran, and ran… until a cowboy hat loomed between the trees. Seeing Stu before he spotted me, I dove forward like a fish and stumbled, sprawled out on the grass. He heard the noise and moved toward me.

??Jason, find out what quadrant she's in!??

??No need,?? a familiar, intimidating voice sounded behind me.

I turned around. Jason was hovering over me, aiming his gun at my head. Stu walked over to me and gave a contented laugh:

??Speak of the devil.??

I got up.

??You shouldn't have,?? he gritted his teeth in a semblance of a smile, and hit me under the knee with the butt of his rifle.

I cried out in pain and staggered, but kept standing. Stu struck a second time. I collapsed onto the ground with a groan. On my knees in front of him, I thought I wouldn't part my lips even if he tried to strangle me.

??Keep her in your sights,?? the cowboy ordered Jason and put the rifle away.

It was out of my reach, but maybe it was worth a try. Stu followed my gaze and with a chuckle pushed the weapon away with his foot. Then he turned back to me.

??Come on!?? He growled impatiently as he unzipped his jeans.

Instead of answering, I spit into his fly.

??You bitch!?? The slap made my head rattle.

I felt dizzy and nearly fell over on my side. The cowboy took advantage of my dizziness trying to force my mouth open, and I sank my teeth into his hand. Stu squealed, and I, tasting his blood in my mouth, bit down even harder.

??Pull the bitch away!?? He whimpered until I leaned back, unclenching my teeth.

The cowboy recoiled, clutching the wound, but immediately ignored it, picking up and raising his rifle:

??You'll pay for that!

Suddenly frightened, I flinched backwards. I'd run out of time.

??Don't touch her!?? Lesha suddenly jumped out from behind a tree and threw himself right at the cowboy.

No! Why the heroics?!? Stu shot his gun in surprise. It looked as if Lesha had hit an invisible barrier: he froze and collapsed onto the ground right in front of me with a blur of red spreading on his chest. The boy blinked a couple of times, and then his body went limp. Tears welled up in my eyes, but I crawled to him and took his hand.

??Why??? I sobbed as I wrapped my arms around the boy's slumped body. ??You fool…??

Why, having made the promise, did he have to keep it? Damn exuberance of youth, and recklessness. The teenager turned out to be braver than the adults around me.

??Now it's your turn, bitch,?? the cowboy wheezed. The rifle was shaking in his hands, making it hard to aim.

??The second murder of the day,?? Jason reminded him indifferently.

??I don't give a shit if it's the tenth!?? Stu went into a rage, rubbing his bitten hand. ??You think I give a shit about your fucking rules? If I want to, I'll shut your fucking shop down.??

??You heard me.??

??I heard you. Now you listen to me, motherfucker,?? the cowboy grimaced again. ??I put my first target down before you could even say the word ?bullet?! Or you think just because you've been put in charge, you can dictate your terms to me? Shove it up your ass! I'll shoot that girl, and if you try to stop me, I'll shoot you too!?? He raised his rifle, pointing it at Jason. ??And don't you try to scare me with the rules. I'm entitled to a bit of compensation, after all, the bitch bit me.??

Taking the gamekeeper's indifferent gaze as tacit consent, Stu turned towards me. I was still on my knees, holding Lesha's hand, brave Lesha who had died for me. I squirmed instinctively and when the shot rang out, I flinched, but I felt no pain. Instead, I heard Stu's desperate screaming. I opened my eyes in surprise: the cowboy had dropped his rifle and was crouching on the ground, holding on to his wounded hip. His hat had flung off his head. Without it, he looked ordinary and unremarkable.

??As a warning,?? Jason explained, not lowering his gun. ??But if that's not enough, I'll put you down.??

??You don't have the guts!?? Stu hissed, grabbing his rifle. ??I'm the client, and you wouldn't dare! But I can afford to take you out!??

The cowboy's hands were shaking. Jason waited for him to take aim, then fired again. The bullet entered Stu's eye through the rifle's telescopic sight. The cowboy's body collapsed to the ground. Unclasping my fingers and letting go of Lesha's hand, I began to crawl back. A hunter had just been killed right before my eyes. Realizing that I wouldn't be allowed to live much longer, I continued crawling until my back was against a tree trunk.

Ignoring my attempt to escape, Jason stepped over the cowboy's body, stopped right in front of me and stared up at the camera above our heads. Jason stared into it, not saying a word, until the red blinking light went out, and then he turned his gaze to me. The gun touched my forehead. I squeezed my eyes shut. As bad luck would have it, no prayers came to mind and I kept repeating to myself: it's over. This is the end now. And as I was mentally saying goodbye to life, I heard Jason's low voice:

??Get up.??

Chapter 4

I opened my eyes in surprise to find that the gamekeeper wasn't going to kill me. Not yet, anyway. I lifted myself from the ground and met his colorless eyes again, and wrapped my arms around myself, trying to stop trembling.

??I'm not going to repeat myself twice,?? Jason warned me as he tucked his gun behind his belt. ??Drag this lard-ass over to that birch tree there.??

Pointing out the direction, he picked up Stu's rifle and hat and began walking. Grabbing cowboy by the legs, I slowly crossed the clearing dragging him along. The jacket on the corpse was baggy and slowed me down, clinging to tree roots and branches lying on the ground. I was exhausted by the time I dragged Stu to the right place. Jason had cleared an area of about two square meters under the birch. The dry branches he'd moved aside had previously covered a small latch sticking out of the ground. Pulling on it and, it seemed to me, twisting a piece of turf out of the way, Jason swung open the leaf-covered hatch. Beneath there was a shallow bunker, like a shipping container buried in the ground.

??Throw him in there,?? he ordered.

I pushed Stu's body down.

??Now get in there yourself.??

??What???

??You have five seconds to decide if you're going in there alive or with a bullet in your head.??

He didn't even reach for his gun. On shaky legs, I climbed down into the metal coffin and laid down. Jason unloaded the rifle and threw it on the corpse together with the hat.

??If you make a sound, you're dead,?? he promised me and closed the hatch.

In the darkness, I could hear him covering the bunker entrance with branches again. Then the sounds faded away. Breathing heavily, I tried to count to a hundred but lost track and went to tens. It didn't make me feel any better. I wasn't claustrophobic, but lying in total darkness next to a dead body was very unnerving. I could almost feel the walls beginning to shift and take in the air. At times it seemed to me that Stu was still alive and about to grab his rifle. The minutes of pressing silence dragged on and I felt like I was ceasing to exist, shrinking under the strain of waiting.

Only once did I hear footsteps over my head. My hope of getting out into the light stirred, but I shrank inwardly as I heard the voice of their owner. If that person found me, a resurrected cowboy would seem like a gift from heaven.

??Did you hear??? The unsuspecting Outcast sniggered. ??Stu was disqualified for shooting both the kid and the slut.??

??So why didn't he pay the fine??? His companion wondered. ??He wanted to finish with the blonde.??

??Apparently, she wasn't good enough to lose money over,?? Outcast laughed. ??That's why he left.??

I didn't recognize the second voice.

The gamekeepers had left and I was digesting what I'd heard. Jason told everyone I'd been killed by the cowboy. Officially, I was dead. He could have eliminated me as an unwanted witness more than once… so why didn't he? I didn't delude myself into believing he was in love with me. My future seemed bleak, considering who my life depended on. Then again, it wasn't a sure thing that he hadn't already gotten rid of me by burying me alive in the middle of the woods. As I brooded over this, the branches above my head rustled and the hatch lifted. Seeing Jason's silhouette against the darkening sky, I sat up. Wondering whether or not I could come out, I heard the first order:

??Take his clothes off.??

Overcoming my squeamishness, I took the cowboy's boots off. The clothes were a bit of a pain to take off; Stu hadn't been very physically active even when he was alive. Hearing the tear of fabric I pulled the jacket off him, barely able to move the body, and ripped the sleeves off his shirt while pulling it off. I stuffed the scraps into a backpack I'd been handed down, and then collapsed tiredly on the cold floor. Jason watched me in silence. After taking a breath, I stood up again, kicking the cowboy's fat body and shoving my knees under him, and finished with the jeans.

??Now cut them off,?? Jason threw me something looking like a cross between a pair of pruning shears and a pair of scissors.

??What??? I almost dropped them.

??Cut off his fingers.??

God, I think I'm going to be sick.

??The first bone of each finger is enough,?? Jason explained when he saw that I couldn't decide which part of the cowboy's finger to put between the sharpened edges of the scissors.

My hands wouldn't cooperate, and Stu's finger kept slipping out from between the sharp blades, but I stubbornly pressed on the handle until I heard a quiet crunch – it had broken through the bone. One down, nine more to go.

I couldn't decide which was more terrifying: knowing that the sword of Damocles was hanging over you, or realizing that there was someone even more frightening than the sword of death. Hearing the gunshots behind me, or the crunch of breaking bones. The third finger gave me a blister on my palm, and the seventh scratched my skin until it bled. Trying hard to control my gagging, I cut off the last pinky finger. Jason shoved the pieces into the bag and picked up the rifle. This was it. Now he was going to kill me for sure.

Instead, Jason swung and forcibly brought the rifle butt down on Stu's head. The impact caused the mangled arm to slide off the cowboy's flabby belly and thud on the bunker floor. I covered my ears and squeezed my eyes shut. I didn't want to hear that sound, and I didn't want to see the skull turning into a bloody mess. But I could still feel every blow. Worst of all were the words that came out in the sudden silence: