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“I don’t know.” That was the most honest answer she had. One minute, she’d been going about her daily routine. The next, the man she’d once believed wanted to marry her was standing on her porch with a boppli in a basket. “I don’t know what to do or say.”
“You could start by holding your sister.”
Sister! She’d never had a sister...or a brother. Her extended family lived in northern New York, too far away except for an occasional visit when one of her cousins married. It’d been her and Grossmammi Ella since her daed left. She’d dreamed of having a sibling. As a kind, she’d prayed night after night for one. Had God answered her prayer like this?
She held out her arms, and Daniel shifted the kind so Hannah could take her.
With a cry, Shelby clung to him. She buried her face in his shoulder, rubbing chocolate into his coat, and wrapped her tiny arms around his neck. Her sobs trembled along her.
“Give her a minute,” Daniel said before murmuring in Englisch, “Shelby, look at Hannah. She likes little girls.”
She shrieked as if caught in a swarm of bees.
Hannah yanked her hands away. Her little sister, the blessed gift she’d yearned for, wanted nothing to do with her. And Shelby cuddled against the man who’d wanted nothing to do with her either.
* * *
Daniel watched the flurry of emotions sweep across Hannah’s face. Frustration. Uncertainty. Regret. Pain. He’d seen the last when she’d found him flirting with other girls. The memory of that evening had lurked in his thoughts for three years, a constant reminder that if he let someone else come as close to his heart as she had, he could wound that person as badly. Better to keep things light and laugh with every girl instead of making a marvelous one like Hannah cry. He wasn’t going to take a chance of that happening again. He’d learned his lesson the hardest possible way.
He wouldn’t have come to the stone-end farmhouse where she lived with her great-grandmother and her bees if he’d had another choice. But he needed to ask for a favor. A big one, and he wasn’t sure if Hannah would agree when they hadn’t spoken in three years.
He should look away from her pretty face, but he couldn’t. How was it possible that Hannah had become even more beautiful? He hadn’t seen her since that evening she’d walked out of his life. His older brother Amos had occasionally mentioned Hannah bringing honey from her hives to sell at his grocery store. Each time, Daniel had changed the subject. He didn’t want to think about how he’d ruined everything between him and Hannah.
In the rainy day’s dim light, her hair was the shade of her honey. Drawn under a green bandana that matched her dress, her hair framed her oval face. Her chocolate-brown eyes displayed her feelings. She’d never been able to hide her thoughts. Now she was upset because the kind refused to go to her.
“It’s okay, Shelby,” he said in Englisch because he suspected she didn’t understand Deitsch, the language the Amish spoke. “You don’t have to go anywhere you don’t want to.”
The kind tilted her head; then she gave him a big grin, showing off tiny teeth. Her eyes crinkled closed, and he saw the striking resemblance between the little girl and Hannah. The shape of their faces, those dark eyes and the shiny, honey-gold hair were almost identical.
“Is your great-grandmother here?” he asked.
“She’s taking a nap.” Hannah continued to stare at Shelby with distress.
“With all this noise?”
“Grossmammi Ella takes a nap every day from one until two-thirty. Even if she’s awake, she won’t come out until two-thirty.” Her lips quirked. “No matter what.”
“That’s weird.”
“It’s her way.”
His nose wrinkled. “Someone could use a diaper change.” He ran a finger along the kind’s tiny arm. “And she’s cold. What she needs is a gut, warm bath.”
“She won’t let me give her one.” Again the dismay filled her voice.
“I’ll help.” He hesitated, then said, “If you’ll let me.”
She glanced toward the front door. As clearly as if she’d shouted, he knew she wanted him to leave.
“This isn’t about what happened to us, Hannah. It’s about what’s happened to your little sister.”
Her face blanched, but she squared her shoulders. He recognized the motion. Whenever Hannah set her shoulders, she was ready to take on a disagreeable task. He’d prefer not to think she saw him as that.
“The bathroom is this way.” She gathered the scattered clothes and bags before leading him into the simple kitchen. She opened the door next to the woodstove and motioned for him to enter.
He couldn’t ignore how Shelby tightened her arms around him when he passed Hannah. He wanted to tell the kind she was making a big mistake. Hannah would do anything for anyone. Everybody knew they could depend on her.
He, on the other hand... He frowned. Trying to explain to Hannah why he’d done what he did would be a waste of breath. He’d failed her three years ago, and he doubted he’d do better now. He couldn’t find the words to tell her how important it was for him to own a business as his older brothers did. He couldn’t admit how scared and worried he’d been to try to handle the challenges of that along with a wife and family. He’d wanted to be honest, but how could he tell the most dependable person he knew he wasn’t sure she could depend on him? And then he’d proved that by flirting with someone else. He couldn’t remember which girl it’d been.
Pushing aside self-recriminations, he carried Shelby into the bathroom as Hannah put the clothes on a counter by the sink. It was a small room. The big bathtub must have been installed for Hannah’s grossmammi. The tub had a door in the side and held a chair where someone could sit while bathing. Hannah made sure the door was locked and lifted out the chair. She shoved it as far toward the window as she could. After turning on the faucet and testing the water to make sure it was neither too hot nor too cold, she faced him.
“Will she let me take her?” she asked.
“Let me get her started, and we’ll see how she does. Can you get a towel and washcloth while I put her into the tub?”
“Ja. They’re right behind you. I’ll get—”
He put out an arm to halt her from reaching past him. When her hand touched his arm, she flinched as if he were connected to an electric circuit and she’d gotten zapped.
Pulling down a towel, she shoved it into his hand. “Why are you here?”
He set the little girl on the floor and knelt to unhook the straps on her overalls. That gave him an excuse not to look at Hannah while he asked for her help. Shelby wiggled as he drew off her wet clothes. Once she was undressed and her braids undone, he rinsed off her bottom before placing her in the tub. She slapped the water and giggled when it flew everywhere, including the front of his shirt.
Taking a washcloth and soap from Hannah, he began washing the kind’s face and arms. He kept one hand on Shelby’s shoulder as he said, “I’ve been hired to strengthen the Hunter’s Mill Creek Bridge so it can be used for heavier traffic again, and I need your help.”
“I’m not much gut with a hammer.”
Was she jesting? He didn’t dare take his eyes off the little girl to see. Deciding it’d be better not to respond to her comment, he said, “I can’t begin work until something is done about the beehive in a rotting board beneath the bridge.”
“Bees? What kind?” Excitement sifted into her voice.
“I think they’re honeybees.”
“You’re not sure?”
He risked a quick glance at Hannah who sat on the chair she’d taken from the tub. She watched how he cleaned the toddler. “You’re the expert. Not me. I can’t tell one kind of bee from another. They need to be moved so nobody gets stung while we’re working on the bridge. I considered spraying them, but I’ve heard there aren’t as many honeybees as there used to be.”
“Ja, that’s true. Pesticides and pests have killed them.”
“That’s why I decided to check with an expert—with you—before I contacted an exterminator.” He cupped his hand and poured warm water over Shelby’s head, wetting it so he could wash her hair. He kept his other hand above her eyes to prevent water from flowing into them.
“Danki for checking, Daniel. Many people don’t. They spray the hive, never stopping to think we need honeybees to pollinate our crops.” She held out a bottle of shampoo. “You’re gut with her.”
“Practice. My sister Esther was a lot younger than the rest of us, and I used to help Mamm. And I’ve got a bunch of nieces and nephews.” He edged back. “Do you want to put the shampoo on her hair?”
“Do you think she’ll let me?”
“One way to know.” Keeping his right hand on Shelby’s arm, he stepped aside.
Hannah eased past him, making sure not an inch of her brushed against him, not even the hem of her apron or kapp strings. She bent over the tub and smiled. “Let’s get your pretty hair clean, Shelby.”
The kind’s lower lip trembled, and thick tears rolled down her cheeks.
Her face falling, Hannah edged away. She wrapped her arms around herself as Shelby returned to her playing when Daniel stood by the tub again.
“How am I going to take care of her when she hates me?” Hannah murmured.
“She doesn’t hate you. She’s scared, and she’s known me longer.”
“Two minutes! That doesn’t make sense.”
“Just as it doesn’t make sense she doesn’t like you. Who knows what goes on in the heads of bopplin?” He shampooed Shelby’s hair, taking care not to get suds in her eyes. He’d stop at his brother’s grocery store and get some shampoo made for boppli before he returned to work on the bridge tomorrow.
At that thought, he said, “I’ll make you a deal, Hannah.” He began to rinse Shelby’s fine hair. “You help me by moving the bees, and I’ll help you learn how to take care of Shelby. In addition, I’ll do all I can to find your daed.”
“How will you find Daed?”
“I can ask the police—”
She shook her head. “It’s not our way to involve Englischers in our business.”
“It may need to be if you want to know the truth about your daed.”
“I don’t know.” She dragged the reluctant words out.
“If the bishop says it’s okay, will you?” He hated backing her into a corner, but she must see that they needed help in the extraordinary situation.
Hannah nodded, but didn’t speak.
Knowing he shouldn’t push her further, he lifted the kind out and wrapped her in a towel before her wiggling sent water all over the bathroom. He watched Hannah’s face, knowing she wished he’d walked away as he had before. But she needed his help. And he needed hers. None of the men he’d hired would get close to the bridge supports while the bees were there.
Putting Shelby on the floor, he grabbed for the unopened bag. He couldn’t reach it.
“What do you need?” Hannah asked.
Your agreement to move the bees, he wanted to say, but didn’t. She was upset, and he didn’t want to make her feel worse. “A diaper.”
She opened the bag and frowned. “Um...”
“Let me look.” He took the bag, and with a smile, he pulled out a disposable diaper. He diapered the toddler and pulled a warm shirt and trousers from the counter to dress her.
Hannah handed him a pair of socks. “I’m sorry. I’ve only seen cloth diapers before.”
“It’s okay.” He hesitated, then said, “If you want, I can take her to our house. My mamm will watch her.”
“No!”
“Are you sure?”
“Ja. My daed could come back. She needs to be here when he does.”
Daniel didn’t argue, though he had his doubts any man who abandoned two daughters would return. “Did you see how I put the diaper on her?”
“Ja. It’s easy.”
“It is. As you’re going to need my help with her, what do you say? Do we have a deal? I’ll help you with Shelby as well as try to find your daed, and you’ll move the bees for me. Do we have a deal?”
“All right, Daniel,” she said as if agreeing to a truce with her worst enemy. He flinched, hoping she didn’t consider him that. He knew he’d have time to find out when she went on, “It’s a deal.”
Chapter Two (#ubb987acd-c01b-502e-ad4e-2b00bb913e0d)
As soon as the words agreeing to the plan with Daniel left her lips, Hannah wanted to take them back. But how could she turn aside his help? Looking at the little girl perched on Daniel’s knee while he sat on the edge of the tub, Hannah knew she needed his assistance. Her great-grandmother might want to help, but the elderly woman was fragile. Grossmammi Ella couldn’t chase an active toddler. Though nothing had ever been said, Hannah often wondered if her grossmammi resented having a ten-year-old dumped on her to raise.
“Gut,” Daniel said as he shifted Shelby into his arms as he stood.
He avoided Hannah’s eyes, and she couldn’t meet his either. Suddenly the bathroom seemed as small as a phone shack.
It seemed to shrink farther when he went on, “I’m glad you’re willing to be sensible about this, Hannah. After all, what happened in the past is best left there.”
“I agree.” That wasn’t exactly the truth, but she wanted to put an end to this strained conversation. She couldn’t imagine how their “deal” would work. Daniel might be able to leave the past in the past, but she wasn’t sure she could. A heated aura of humiliation surrounded her whenever she thought of how he’d dumped her without an explanation.
Shelby chirped and tugged at his hair, interrupting Hannah’s bleak thoughts. A kind depended on her. For that reason—and to protect a hive of what she hoped were healthy honeybees—she would work with Daniel. She wouldn’t trust him. She’d learned her lesson.
Hearing a soft chime from the timer on the kitchen stove, Hannah gathered the wet towel and washcloth. She tossed them in the tub and ignored Daniel’s surprise when she left them there.
“Do you have something in the oven?” he asked.
“No. My great-grandmother sets the timer every afternoon before going to rest in her room. About fifteen minutes after it chimes, she’ll come out. I try to have a cup of tea ready for her.
“I should get going then.”
“But the bees—”
He pointed toward the window where water ran down the glass. “Let’s put that off until the rain stops. We can go tomorrow morning.”
“That makes sense.” At least one thing had today. Everything else, from Daniel’s appearance at her door to the idea her daed might have been there moments before, had been bizarre and painful. Why hadn’t Daed knocked on the door?
A fresh wave of grief struck her as hard as the rain battered the window. Had Daed thought she wouldn’t want to see him? Or did he think Grossmammi Ella would refuse to let him in? Hannah would have talked with him on the porch. She wouldn’t have been able to hug him while he was under the bann, but she would have welcomed him home and asked him why he’d left her behind. Why hadn’t he come home? And, when he did, why did he leave Shelby without letting Hannah know he was there?
“If you need anything before I come back,” Daniel said, “let me know.”
She frowned. “How? I can’t leave a toddler and my great-grandmother here alone.”
“My brother has a phone in the barn. I’ll give you the number.”
“Danki.” She regretted snapping at him. She couldn’t let dismay with her daed color her conversations with others. Maybe Daniel was right. Leaving the past in the past was a gut idea. “Our Englisch neighbors let me use their phone when it’s necessary. We should be okay. There are plenty of diapers and clothing in the bag for tonight.”
“Gut.” He left the bathroom.
