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“You’ve always been a gambler, too, Megan,” Travis said in a tone more gentle than she’d ever heard from him. “Don’t forget that. You’re a fighter. A survivor. You never give up.”
An unexpected lump formed in her throat. “Is that how you see me?”
“Of course. Why are you so surprised?”
“I always thought—” She decided not to tell him what she’d thought his opinion of her was. “Never mind. It doesn’t matter.”
He hitched his chair closer to the table and leaned toward her. “Look, if you don’t want to owe me money, then I have a suggestion on how you could buy yourself some time—so that you could pay this year’s mortgage payment, wait on the market to sell your cattle, maybe investigate other stock you might choose to bring in. It would give you some breathing room.”
She eyed him warily. “What do you suggest I do, win the lottery?”
“Nope. Marry me.”
Two (#ulink_3becc153-e9b3-5332-8029-4e8d6668642b)
Megan realized that her jaw must have dropped because she suddenly became aware of the fact that her mouth was dry. She groped for the glass in front of her, draining it while her thoughts raced around in her head like a rioting crowd of protesters.
Travis Kane was suggesting that she marry him? Travis Kane? How could he be sitting there watching her so calmly?
“Marry you?” she finally repeated weakly.
“I know you think I’m crazy,” he replied hurriedly, as though afraid she was going to demand that he leave, “but listen to me for a minute. Just hear me out. It won’t be considered a loan that way. I’ll be making an investment that may or may not work out, but whatever happens, you’ll have the money you need, plus some left over. You’ll have enough to repair that blasted windmill and whatever else’s broken down. You’ll have the money to hire extra help, which I’m sure you could use. We’ll treat it like a business arrangement, like a partnership contract, or something. We’ll set a time limit—say one year. Twelve months. At the end of that time we’ll review the situation, decide if we want to continue the partnership. If we don’t, well—who knows what will have happened by then?” He flashed that smile of his and she could feel herself succumbing. “I mean, the drought can’t last forever. Things are bound to pick up and you won’t have to be worried all the time about—”
“What’s in all of this for you?”
He’d been talking rapidly but he stopped at her question as though a hand had been clamped over his mouth. He swallowed, eyeing her cautiously. “For me?” he repeated, as though puzzled by the question.
“Uh-huh. Why are you willing to be so generous? If you want the ranch, why don’t you just make me an offer on the place and we can talk about it?”
“Megan, there’s no way you’d ever sell this place and we both know it. This is your home. I don’t want it. Ranching doesn’t fit in with my life-style. You know that. Besides, if you sold the place, where would you and the girls live?”
She couldn’t believe she was sitting there at the kitchen table having this conversation, and with Travis Kane, of all people. “If we were to sell the ranch, we would have the money to move anywhere. If the bank forecloses, I’m not sure where we’ll go,” she admitted. “But we’d find a place somewhere. We certainly wouldn’t starve.”
“This way you could stay here and still have the money you need to make repairs and—”
“You didn’t answer my question. Why would you make such an offer? What do you expect to get out of this?”
The look he gave her was definitely wary. “A wife?” he offered a little hesitantly.
“C’mon, Travis. The last thing you could possibly want is to get married. You need a wife like you need another hole in your head. And even if you’ve suddenly decided that marriage appeals to you, you certainly don’t want to be married to me, of all people!”
He fidgeted. There was no other word for it. He pulled his earlobe, scratched his nose, fussed with his collar, then shoved his hair off his forehead. Finally he muttered, “Don’t underestimate yourself, Megan.”
Seeing his nervousness gave her some comfort, but not much. “Are you saying you’re in love with me?”
He straightened in his chair. “Umm—well, would you believe me if I told you I was?”
“Absolutely not,” she immediately responded.
He flexed his shoulders in another restless movement. “Then I’m not in love with you.”
She gave him an approving nod. “Well, at least you’re being honest.”
He cleared his throat and took a long drink from his glass without meeting her gaze.
She studied him for several minutes in silence. “You can’t be serious,” she finally said.
“I am,” he argued. “Try me.”
“Try you?” she repeated suspiciously. “Would you care to explain what you mean by that remark?”
“It’s just a figure of speech and you know it. I’m willing to prove to you that I’m serious, that I’m making an offer in good faith. I want to help you. That’s what friends are for—to help each other.”
“You make it sound like some kind of a game!” She leaned back in her chair and deliberately deepened her voice. “Hey, there’s not much going on in my life these days. Maybe I should get married!” In her normal voice she added, “Life is always a joke to you. Admit it!”
“Well, what about you? You always look at life so blasted seriously all the time. Can’t you lighten up a little, once in a while, have some fun?”
“Of course you would see things that way. Life’s always been easy for you. You’ve never had to be responsible about anything or for anyone. You’ve never been serious about anything in your entire life.”
“A few things,” he murmured.
“Such as?”
“I’ve taken my rodeoing serious. I’ve won some good prize money. I take that serious enough. It’s the money I’m willing to offer to you, money that I’ve worked hard to earn. You don’t hear me joking about that, do you?”
Grudgingly she said, “Okay, I’ll go along with that one.”
“I take my friendships seriously, as well. I know I haven’t been home much these past few years but whenever I’m in town, I’ve always made a point of checking on you, to make sure you and the girls were okay. As I recall, a couple of years ago I actually asked you to go to the movies with me. As also I recall, you were quick enough about turning me down.”
“Going to a movie would have meant an hour’s drive to the next town.”
“Is that why you turned me down?”
She stared at him. “I get up early. I can’t stay out late at night. I didn’t figure you meant it, anyway. You were just trying to get a reaction out of me, like always. You’ve always been the biggest tease I’ve ever known, Travis, bar none.”
“You don’t date at all, do you?”
She looked down at her shirt and coveralls, then at him. “Of course I do. Why, I’ve got men lined up outside the door, impatiently waiting their turn to take me out. A stunning creature like me has to fight ’em off.”
Travis frowned. “Don’t, Megan.”
“Don’t what?”
“Don’t make fun of yourself that way. You’re a very attractive woman. Just as important, you’re a very warm and loving woman, protective of your family, willing to do whatever it takes to keep everyone safe.”
She narrowed her eyes and peered at him. “Did you by any chance get kicked in the head by one of those bulls you ride or something, Travis? I can’t believe what I’m hearing coming out of your mouth. Are you sure you don’t have me confused with someone else?”
“What I think is that we haven’t spent much time together in. the past several years and that there’s a lot you don’t know about me. Obviously what you do know doesn’t impress you much. So how about giving me a chance to prove to you that I can make a good husband?”
A shiver ran over her at the word husband. Travis Kane? She would have to be out of her mind to consider marrying him, of all people. For any reason.
Even if it means saving the ranch? a little voice whispered inside her head.
For the first time in her life she finally understood what the preacher was talking about when he chose the subject of temptation for his Sunday sermons.
Temptation was a mighty insidious thing. It teased and tantalized, making all her beliefs dance and jump around, stand on tiptoe and fall over.
Travis Kane had been a pest as a kid, and his constant need to tease her had come close to breaking her heart in high school. Of course he’d never known the crush she’d developed on him back then. She had no intention of ever letting him know.
What would the star-struck girl back then have done if she’d known that someday in the future the ever-popular Travis Kane would actually come to her and propose marriage.
As a friend.
He didn’t love her, of course. Hadn’t he just said so?
But then, she didn’t love him, either. She knew better.
So. It would be a business deal, that’s all. It would have an expiration date.
“A year, you said?”
“It can be longer, if you want.”
“Oh, no. A year would be fine. It would give me some breathing space, like you said. I’d have some time to make plans, decide whether I should try to sell the place. After that, I could—” She paused, her thoughts finally leading her to ask, “I, uh—I guess you’d expect to live here, then?” She laughed nervously and answered her own question. “Well, of course you would. We’d be married and it would look strange to everybody if you continued to live at home with your folks.” She knew she sounded rattled because she was. This was the most bizarre thing that had ever happened to her. Even more bizarre was the fact that she was actually considering accepting his outlandish offer… because the alternative was too painful for her to face. She’d been praying for a miracle, hadn’t she? She just hadn’t realized before God’s strange sense of humor.
“I’m not home all that much, anyway, Megan,” Travis was saying, quietly. “I’m still following the rodeo circuit.”
“Oh, that’s right!” she replied, unable to hide her obvious relief. “Well, that would work out okay.” She went on, hopping up from the table. She began to pace. “I mean, we’ve got plenty of room,” she said with an expansive wave of her arm. “Why, this old house rambles in all directions. There’s several bedrooms…” She came to an abrupt halt, her voice trailing off. She eyed him uncertainly. “Would you expect to share my room?”
He took a deep breath and held it, his gaze never leaving hers. When he finally exhaled, he gave her a lopsided smile. “Whatever you’re comfortable with, Megan.”
“Oh.” She thought about the idea of sharing a bedroom with Travis Kane and shivered. “Well, I’m certainly not comfortable with the thought of sharing my room with you…or anybody…really.”
“I see.”
She began to pace once again. “Well, I mean, the whole idea takes some getting used to, you’ve got to admit. I never expected to get married so I’ve never given it much thought.”
“Why?”
She’d reached the window and was looking outside, wondering when the girls would be getting back from town, wondering how she could possibly explain to them what she was thinking about doing. She whirled around to face him, vaguely recalling his question. “Why what?” she repeated. “Why give it much thought? Because I’ve had other more important things to think about.”
Travis stretched his long legs out straight, then tipped his chair back and crossed his ankles. “No, I want to know why you never thought you’d get married.”
She threw her arms wide and grinned. “Who would be interested in marrying somebody like me who’s trying to keep a run-down ranch going as well as raise a couple of sisters? Nobody in his right mind is going to be interested in getting involved in a situation like that.” She eyed him speculatively.
“I am,” he said mildly.
She continued to study him. Had she found the fly in this particular ointment? Had he fallen off a bull onto his head one too many times and scattered his brain cells? He appeared rational enough, but his suggestion had all the earmarks of a crazy man. However, he’d been smart enough to place a time condition on the agreement. She smiled at him as she reminded him. “Yes, but only for a year. Believe me, after a year you’ll be more than ready to get away from this place.” She nodded, seeing more and more advantages to his wild suggestion. “By that time Mollie will have graduated from high school. Who knows? Maybe both of them will want to move into town. Or maybe to Austin or San Antonio.”
Suddenly feeling more lighthearted than she’d felt in weeks—no, more like months—Megan realized that she was starved. She went over to the refrigerator and opened the door. “Speaking of the girls, both of them stayed in town last night with friends. I don’t know when they’ll get home tonight, but I don’t intend to hold supper for them. I’m hungry.” She peered over her shoulder at him. “Do you want to stay and eat with me?”
He smiled and in a gentle voice, said, “I’d like that, Megan.”
She began to rummage around inside the refrigerator. “It won’t be anything fancy. Mollie’s the real cook around here. I just throw together some of the basics and—”
She straightened and backed away from the refrigerator with her hands full, then turned to find Travis immediately behind her. He took the dishes out of her hands and placed them on the nearby counter, then reached behind her and closed the refrigerator door.
“I think we should seal the bargain, don’t you?” he murmured, trapping her between him and the refrigerator.
Megan couldn’t remember ever having been caught so off guard. Before she could think, his lips were pressing against hers. A bolt of electrical shock went through her. Travis was kissing her. Travis Kane. Kissing her. Her…Megan O’Brien…tomboy…the girl who…
Her thoughts scattered as her senses took over. She became aware of the woodsy scent of his after-shave, the minty flavor of his mouth, the muscled wall of his chest as it pressed against hers, his uneven breathing as he tilted his head to another angle, teasing her with his tongue. Her eyes drifted closed, savoring all the new and glorious sensations that were sweeping over her.
She’d never been kissed by a man before, a man whose hands were tracing her spine, shaping her buttocks and pulling her closer so that she could feel—could feel…
Megan’s eyes flew open and she gave him a sudden shove. Caught off guard, he took a couple of quick steps back before regaining his balance.
They stared at each other, both of them breathing unevenly. Her heart felt as though it were going to leap out of her chest.
“It was just a kiss, Megan. That’s all,” he said quietly.
“Yeah, and Carlsbad Caverns is just a hole in the ground. That’s all,” she said, mimicking him.
“That’s true,” he replied, smiling.
She spun away and began to busy herself with making some sandwiches, doing her best to forget how she’d felt when Travis kissed her.
“I take it you don’t want me to kiss you,” he finally said in the silence that stretched between them.
She bit down on her lower lip, knowing that she couldn’t lie to him, but not knowing exactly what the truth was. Continuing to keep busy with their meal, she said, “It isn’t that. I—It’s just that—I mean, I don’t have a lot of experience in these things, and…” She couldn’t think of how to continue.
He kept his distance from her when he said, “And you think that I mind? Just because you’re innocent doesn’t mean—”
She turned and glared at him. “I’m not innocent!” She closed her eyes and swallowed. Now she was really giving him the wrong idea about her! She opened her eyes and tried again. “I mean—What I meant was that anyone raised on a ranch knows all about reproduction and sex and—Well, you know what I mean. It’s just that—” She waved her hand helplessly, not knowing how to explain how confused she was feeling at the moment.
He watched her intently. “Yeah, you’ve told me. You haven’t done much dating. I understand.”
She turned back to the counter, picked up the plate of sandwiches she’d prepared and carried it to the table. After refilling their glasses she motioned for him to sit down. “I don’t know what you expect from me, that’s all,” she finally muttered, sitting down across from him and looking everywhere but at him.
He reached for a sandwich and put it on his plate. “I don’t expect anything you don’t want to give,” he said in a careful tone of voice. “I realize that what I’m suggesting isn’t the usual way of doing things.”
“It’s crazy, that’s what it is. Who’s going to believe it? It doesn’t make any sense. I can’t believe I’m actually considering it!” She took a big bite out of her sandwich, concentrating on eating and trying to distance herself from the familiar stranger across the table from her. How could she know somebody so well and yet not know him at all? How could she hate him—well, resent him anyway—for not noticing her when he was the big man on campus and she had so wanted him to see her as a young woman, and not the tomboy he’d pestered on the bus for years. She’d been invisible to him then. So why now? Why was this happening all these years later?
“I have a suggestion,” he said, after finishing one of the sandwiches and reaching for another.
“What?” she asked suspiciously.
“I think we should keep the arrangement we’ve made just between the two of us. I think we’ll both be more comfortable that way. Why don’t we tell our families that we suddenly discovered our true feelings for each other and—”
