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“Ethan—”
But he’d already hung up. The dial tone had switched to an agitated beep before Claire finally placed the cordless receiver back on its charger.
Disappointed, that was how she felt. She’d expected to experience a vastly different emotion once she’d contacted him, confronted her past. Instead of moving forward, though, she was stuck in Neutral.
“I said I was sorry,” she murmured. It dawned on her that he’d never accepted her apology. “But he would accept a check.”
She prowled her apartment, too restless to sit still. Not that she had much of anything to sit on. She had no furniture, although she had picked out a couch, chairs and an ottoman for the living room, as well as a cherry bedroom suite. It would be several weeks yet before any of it would be delivered. The bare walls and floors didn’t lend any hominess to the place. Indeed, they added to her sense of isolation. She paced to the bedroom, where a queen-sized mattress and box spring were pushed against one wall. At least she wasn’t sleeping on the floor any longer.
But she was sleeping alone.
For the first time in years she allowed herself to recall the way it had felt to slumber next to Ethan and to wake with his heavy arm draped across her torso. The gesture had seemed protective rather than possessive, just as the caresses had been patient and instructive as well as seductive.
She shivered now. She’d trembled then.
I promise I’ll make you happy, Claire.
Caught up in the moment, caught up in the magic, she’d promised him the same. Another vow that both of them had broken.
Angry with Ethan, but more angry with herself, Claire tossed her workout clothes into a duffel bag and tugged a baseball cap low over her brow, leaving her short locks to sprout out the sides. She didn’t bother with makeup. She left for the gym she belonged to across town, determined to exorcise old demons and sweat away her frustration and self-directed irritation on a stationary bike.
An hour later, as she pedaled furiously, perspiration slicking her brow and sliding down her spine to soak the waist of her cotton workout shorts, Claire didn’t miss the irony that, just as with her ex-husband, she was getting absolutely nowhere.
Ethan thought he had come so far since his short-lived and foolishly impulsive marriage to Claire, but merely hearing her voice that morning had yanked him backward and left him dangling from the same high precipice he’d fallen off a decade earlier.
It had been nearly two hours since her telephone call and he still couldn’t get his mind to settle or his memory to shut off. Recollections from their past haunted him. Snippets from their conversation nagged.
“I’m sorry.”
He had to admit, the apology had come as a complete surprise. Even more shocking, though, had been the fact that Claire hadn’t denied using him. Nor had she tried to foist the blame for the fiasco that had been their marriage onto anyone else. No. She’d accepted full responsibility for behavior she’d readily conceded was selfish and immature.
Why didn’t that make him feel any better? Why was he still sitting at his desk two hours later poking at her every word with the same morbid fascination of a gawker slowing down at the site of a car wreck?
Why hadn’t he just said, Apology accepted, nice knowing you, and let it go at that?
Perhaps because she’d also claimed, “I’ve changed.”
The words had him wondering. They had him curious.
Changed? What exactly did she mean by that? Had she grown a conscience? Or had she, too, at odd times over the past decade, found herself wondering where he was, what he was doing, if he was happy?
She’d been the only woman who’d ever made him fall so hard and fast. Love at first sight? Not exactly, but damned close. Ethan shoved a hand through his hair in disgust and sipped his coffee. The usually mild blend seemed as bitter as his mood. Well, whatever the reason for her call, he wasn’t about to find himself in the same room as Claire Mayfield again.
It wasn’t like him to avoid confrontation. Claire, of course, had a way of making him do things that were out of character. Like marrying her after only a handful of dates. Like seeking a divorce mere days after making what he’d thought would be a lifetime commitment.
I, Ethan James Seaver, take thee, Claire Anne Mayfield, as my lawfully wedded wife…
Even though he didn’t want to remember, he was tugged back in time. He’d been twenty-six, determined to take on the world even though he’d been a mere security guard working second shift at the Mayfield corporate headquarters in Chicago. The family-owned company manufactured everything from toothpaste to pharmaceuticals with operations in seventeen countries around the globe. Claire had been twenty-one, reserved to the point of shyness. She’d been vulnerable, delicate, the kind of woman a man felt he needed to protect.
And she’d been beautiful.
Her hair had hung nearly to her waist, a dark veil of sorts behind which she’d seemed to hide. Once they’d properly met it had been his habit to push it away from her face and tuck it behind her ears so that he could see her better. The first time he’d done it, her eyes had grown wide. Then she’d smiled slowly and he’d felt the earth shift under his feet. She was the only woman who’d ever had that effect on him. He told himself he didn’t miss that feeling of being out of control, that feeling of being…lost.
Claire had been doing an internship in the marketing department at Mayfield that summer. Each day, she’d left work at precisely five-thirty—the same time that Ethan took his dinner break in the employees’ cafeteria. She’d always stopped in for a bottle of water to drink on the drive home. At first, Ethan hadn’t known who Claire was, not that her identity would have mattered much or ended the attraction. He might have grown up poor on Chicago’s south side, but even back then he’d had no shortage of confidence, no dearth of pride.
He’d never considered that he might not be “good enough” for her. What did it matter that his diploma had come from a community college rather than the Ivy League? What did it matter that her family’s name regularly appeared in the newspaper, announcing Mayfield’s many innovations and triumphs, whereas the only time the Seaver name had made the Sun-Times or Tribune it had been in the obituaries?
Everett Daniel Seaver, beloved husband of Mary, doting father of Ethan, Michael and James, died on Monday as the result of a motorcycle accident. In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations be made to the family to cover funeral expenses.
Ethan had been in elementary school and, at eleven, the oldest. His father had held a low-paying job. He’d had no life insurance, no savings put away. He’d left behind a heap of credit-card debt and a devastated wife who had barely managed to keep their family intact. In fact, for a little while Mary Seaver had been so broken that she hadn’t managed at all. Ethan still remembered the confusion, the fear he and his brothers had experienced when the authorities had come to take them to foster care.
He’d been determined not to repeat his father’s mistakes. He’d planned to make something of himself. In fact, he’d considered himself well on his way with a college degree under his belt and a growing bank account with which he planned to start his own business. So, after a week of his polite nods and her sidelong glances, he’d asked Claire for her telephone number. She’d blushed as she’d written it out on a paper napkin for him.
Their first date, if it could be called a date since it had occurred during his forty-five-minute dinner break, had ended with a polite handshake while she’d waited for her father’s driver to arrive at Mayfield’s front entrance. He could still recall the way her slim fingers had brushed against his rough palm as she’d pulled away. He’d never been so turned on in all his life.
The second date had ended with a brief kiss that nonetheless had heated his blood from simmering to a rolling boil and had made him desperate for much, much more. Barely a month afterward he’d asked her to marry him. It wasn’t until later that he’d realized Claire actually had been the one to bring up the subject of matrimony.
Memories he’d long kept buried resurrected themselves now. He recalled the way she’d looked during their hasty Las Vegas wedding—small, delicate, her dark hair twisted into a clever knot at the back of her head that kept it away from her face. Her gold-flecked brown eyes had been luminous.
She hadn’t worn the traditional bridal gown, but a simple suit whose pencil skirt tapered to the knee. It had been white, a fitting color he’d discovered later when they’d been alone in their hotel room, consummating the vows they’d just spoken. For a brief time, he’d counted himself the luckiest man in the world and he’d looked forward to building a future together.
…Till death us do part.
The words rang in Ethan’s head and snapped him back to the present. He scrubbed a hand over his face. A fool, that was what he’d been. Played from beginning to end by someone who might have been innocent but had been no novice at getting what she’d wanted.
He’d let himself be taken in by her slow smile and wide eyes. But Claire hadn’t loved him. She hadn’t planned to stay married to him, he’d learned soon enough. Ethan had been a means to an end, a payback, according to her father, who had arrived at their hotel suite late the following day.
Sumner Mayfield had come to take her home. He’d pulled her aside. Words had been spoken. Ethan had thought he heard Claire’s mother mentioned. Then Claire had turned, smiled sadly.
“I have to go.”
“Don’t leave, Claire.” Something had told Ethan that if she went now, she wouldn’t be back.
“Think about your mother,” her father said. Ethan watched her swallow and stifle a sob. Then she fled to the bedroom where the sheets were still warm from their lovemaking.
In the sitting area Sumner Mayfield explained his daughter’s “rash” behavior to a thunderstruck Ethan.
“I’m afraid she’s not happy with her fiancé right now.”
“Fiancé?” The word had all but choked Ethan when he uttered it. No. The man was mistaken. He had to be. “She’s not engaged.”
“I’m sorry, son,” Sumner said. “His name is Ashton Beaumont. They’ve known each other for years. Our families have always been close.”
“Ashton Beaumont,” he mumbled.
“Yes. Perhaps you’ve heard of his father. Rolland Beaumont owns a few dozen television and radio stations around the country. Ashton is being primed to take over after his father’s retirement in a few years.”
“I’ve heard of the Beaumonts.” And, while Ethan had always considered himself any man’s equal, he knew a paralyzing moment of self-doubt and insecurity. Later, as much as for her lies, he’d resented Claire for that. “So, when were they supposed to marry?”
“Well, that’s the problem. Ashton wants to wait till she graduates from college in a couple of years. Sensible man.” Sumner nodded thoughtfully. “You know, she needs to grow up a little more and enjoy some independence before settling down.”
“She seems ready enough,” he countered. But the statement had been made with more bravado than confidence.
“Yes, she thinks so,” Sumner agreed. He sighed wearily. “Her heart’s been set on being a June bride. This June. It looks like she got her wish.”
“That’s right. She’s my wife now.” Ethan crossed his arms, braced his legs. The last stand of a doomed man.
“I know.” Sumner nodded. “But for how long, son? Do you really think she plans to stay married to you? Your backgrounds, your lifestyles, they’re simply incompatible.”
Ethan’s arms dropped to his sides, although his hands remained fisted.
“Claire can be surprisingly impulsive,” Sumner continued. “She’s regretting this hasty marriage already, believe me. She wanted to make Ashton see reason. She never intended for things to get this far.”
Ethan said nothing. Instead, he fingered the simple and inexpensive band of gold on his left hand. Claire was wearing its twin.
“I know my daughter.” Sumner’s tone and his expression were appallingly sympathetic as he stepped for-ward to rest one hand on Ethan’s shoulder. “That’s why I’m here.”
While Ethan stood there—stupefied and numb—Sumner wrote out a check.
“For your trouble,” he said, tucking it into Ethan’s hand.
When he turned, Claire was standing in the bedroom doorway. Her hair was loose, partially obscuring her face. Still, he saw the truth clearly enough in the flush of color that stained her cheeks.
Words were exchanged, although exactly what had been said, he could no longer remember. Only that he had ached after he’d watched her follow her father out the door.
They hadn’t spoken again, although when he’d returned to Chicago he’d had a visit from her family’s attorney. Ethan’s employment with the company that provided security for Mayfield was terminated—dereliction of duty cited as the reason. He could have protested it, but why bother? Just as he could have objected when he’d been asked to sign divorce papers. He hadn’t. In short order Claire Seaver had become Claire Mayfield once again. Ethan had moved to Detroit, where he’d worked like a dog to start his own business.
He’d been trying his damnedest to forget the woman ever since, and he’d been doing a fair job of it…until today.
CHAPTER TWO
SUMNER MAYFIELD WAS average height and a little on the heavy side. He carried his weight well, though, thanks to broad shoulders and cleverly tailored clothes that helped hide his widening girth. To Claire, her father had always been larger than life, someone she had feared as much as she had revered. Today, as she sat across from him in his office in the Mayfield headquarters building, she noted the deep lines that fanned from his eyes and the thinning hair. He’d grown older, she realized. And she’d finally grown up.
“Your mother was wondering if you’d be by for dinner this evening,” he said.
“I have plans.” She didn’t, but neither did she intend to subject herself to an evening of badgering and emotional blackmail. “Sorry.”
“You disappoint me, Claire. Aren’t you even going to ask how she is?”
“Has she recovered from her migraine?”
“Thankfully, yes. She’s been in bed for days, you know. Even the prescription the doctor gave her failed to take the edge off for more than a day.” His tone held accusation.
“Why is that my fault, Dad?” He always did this, both of her parents did. They tried to make her feel guilty and responsible, as if her mother’s very survival depended on Claire toeing the line.
“Well, your current behavior certainly isn’t helping matters. You know how delicate her health is.”
Claire sucked in a breath, held it a moment before exhaling slowly through her teeth.
“I’m not here to talk about Mother. I’m here to discuss business. I want you to reconsider my application for vice president of new product development for our North American market.”
“Kitten, we’ve been over this,” he said condescendingly. “Before you left for the Himalayas I explained why I passed you over. You’re just not ready.”
“Clive thinks I am,” she said, invoking the name of the department’s executive head. He was set to retire by the end of the year, at which time the current vice president would take his place, creating the opening Claire sought. Clive said she reminded him a lot of her father.
“You have great instincts,” he’d told her a couple of months back when he’d encouraged her to approach her father.
Sumner didn’t share his opinion.
“I think you need more time,” he said, steepling his fingers. “Besides, Roger Fleming has been in the department longer.”
“So longevity trumps ingenuity? For goodness’ sake, Dad, Roger Fleming wouldn’t recognize innovation if it bit him in the butt,” she countered. Claire had ideas. She saw potential for greater opportunities for Mayfield to move into so-called green products that were more environmentally friendly. It was a largely untapped market for the company. “Mayfield is on the cusp. We can embrace change or we can watch our customer base continue to erode.”
“Some of our products face stiff competition,” Sumner conceded. “But overall we’re solid.”
“Dinosaurs were solid too. Look what happened to them.”
He snorted. “Mayfield is never going to become extinct.”
“Maybe not extinct, but we’re following where we used to be leading. You’ve told me often enough that Granddad was a pioneer. That spirit has been lost. We’re reacting to our competitors, rather than being proactive and forcing them to react to us. I can be a great asset to this company if given half a chance.”
After that impassioned monologue, Sumner merely shook his head. “I’m sorry, Claire. My mind is made up. Maybe in another couple of years you’ll be ready for a position like that. For now, I think you need more…seasoning.”
“Another couple of years?” She thought about the bike trip, the hours she’d cycled, the distance she’d traveled in more ways than could be measured in miles or kilometers. She couldn’t tolerate the status quo any longer. “I’m sorry too, Dad, because you leave me no choice but to look for work elsewhere.”
Sumner looked amused by her bold declaration. “And where would you go, kitten?”
She gritted her teeth at the childish nickname. Even now he didn’t see her as an adult. “I’m not sure, but I don’t think I’ll have a problem getting a job.”
“Oh, really?”
“As you’ve always told me, Dad, the Mayfield name opens doors.”
Sumner glowered in response. “Don’t threaten me, young lady,” he admonished, standing so he could lean forward to rest his hands on the desk.
It was a tactic she’d seen him use often in the boardroom, generally with favorable results. It didn’t work on Claire—this time. She rose to her feet as well.
“I’m not threatening you.” She kept her voice calm, her gaze steady lest he accuse her of being hysterical. Her father could be disgustingly sexist, a character trait Claire’s mother enabled with her feebleness. “I’m stating fact. I want to stay at Mayfield. That goes without saying. But only if you finally start taking me seriously and recognize that I have real contributions to make.”
“Perhaps I’d take you more seriously if you’d settle down and stop acting so outrageously. Moving into the city, breaking your mother’s heart.”
“What’s outrageous about wanting to run my own life? I could be the best thing to happen to product development in a long time if you’d stop treating me like I’m twelve and start remembering that I have a master’s degree in business. As a Mayfield, I have a stake in this company, which is why I’ve stayed even after watching less qualified people be promoted above me. I want a position that reflects my capabilities and challenges my potential. If I can’t get that at Mayfield, then I’ll go elsewhere to meet my needs.”
“Your needs?” He levered himself away from the desk and walked to the window. Over one shoulder he asked, “What do you need, Claire? Your mother and I have given you everything you could ever want.”
“Except the freedom to push myself,” she said quietly. “That’s what I liked about the Himalayas trip. For the first time in my life, being a Mayfield wasn’t enough. I had no one else to fall back on.” She thought of Ethan when she added, “I had no one to use.” And then she thought of her parents. “I had no one to blame. It all came down to me, to my stamina, to my skills and to my sheer will.”
“It was just a bike ride.”
