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Amber had known Jim a long time, due to the close relationship he had with her father, but he almost always made her feel slightly uncomfortable every time she was around him. And she didn’t really want to be around him right now.
She looked away quickly as he smiled at her, staring down at her feet, her hands in her pockets. ‘Could I have a quick word with Ryan, please? For News North East?’
‘He’s all yours, honey,’ Jim Allen winked, giving her his best smile, and Amber looked away again, this time pretending to root around in her bag for some imaginary object. ‘How’s your old man, by the way? I hear he’s doing okay over there at Bracken Town.’
‘He’s fine,’ Amber replied, still rooting around in her bag, aware that Ryan’s eyes were on her. She could almost feel them boring into the back of her neck.
‘Well, tell him to give me a call, okay? It’s been a while since we’ve had a proper catch-up.’ His eyes met hers again. ‘Yeah… It’s been a long time.’ He turned his attention back to Ryan, leaving him with a friendly slap on the shoulder. ‘Proud of you today, kiddo. Be nice to Amber, okay? She’s a good friend of mine.’ He looked at her again. ‘A very good friend.’
Amber watched Jim leave, almost breathing an inner sigh of relief, before slowly turning round to face Ryan.
‘Not one word since Thursday?’ he asked, his comment, not to mention his tone of voice, taking her completely by surprise. She had no idea it would even have bothered him. She’d given him what he’d wanted, hadn’t she?
‘You’ve been holed up in a hotel since Friday afternoon, Ryan. There was no way to get in touch with you.’
Jim Allen was a great believer in making sure his players had as few distractions as possible before a match. The day before any game – be it home or away – he’d take his team to a hotel, away from everything, away from all outside distractions, and make sure they were focused on nothing but football. No contact of any kind with wives, girlfriends or any family members was allowed – unless it was an emergency, of course. He wanted everyone to think only about the forthcoming match, and nothing else.
‘That’s crap, Amber. We didn’t leave for the fucking hotel until after 3 o’clock…’
Amber quickly switched to professional mode, looking him straight in the eye. ‘Any more thoughts on this evening’s match?’
‘For fuck’s sake, Amber, we’ve already done this… I loved every second of it, the crowd were amazing, the boss is a legend, and I was proud to get a hat-trick on my debut for the club. There. Anything else you need to know? Not one frigging word, Amber.’
‘Hang on, can we rewind a bit here because I’m a touch confused. You are Ryan Fisher, aren’t you? The one who, quite frankly, will sleep with anything that shows him the slightest bit of interest and then prays they never want to see him again once the sex is over? That is you, isn’t it?’
‘You were different, Amber,’ Ryan hissed, trying to keep his voice down, but he was more than agitated that she didn’t seem to care about what had happened between them. Because he did. Oh, he didn’t want to. Jesus, of course he didn’t want to feel that way, but he did. ‘I didn’t want to leave; you do know that, don’t you?’
Amber said nothing at first, just looked at him, searching his handsome face because there was something different about him today that she hadn’t really noticed before. Sincerity? Was that it?
‘I needed you to go, Ryan,’ she whispered. Her stomach felt as though it was tied up in knots, the confusion she’d been feeling since Thursday threatening to overwhelm her again. For so many reasons.
‘Why, Amber? Why did you need me to go? Because you actually enjoyed yourself and were afraid to let anyone know that?’
‘Come on, Ryan. I’d just slept with you – with you, so how do you expect me to react?’
‘What the hell’s that supposed to mean?’
She looked away for a second, looking over at Ronnie who was deep in conversation with a couple of reporters she recognised. ‘I didn’t want to be another conquest, Ryan.’
‘You weren’t. You aren’t.’
She looked at him. ‘Why should I believe you? I mean, you have such a reputation, a reputation that…’
‘That means I couldn’t possibly find someone that makes me feel different?’
Amber stared at him. She just stared at him, because she couldn’t actually think of anything to say.
‘Okay, I have a reputation, I’ll hold my hands up to that,’ Ryan began, staring down at his trainers for a second. ‘And, as you’ve just pointed out, I’ve obviously got a lot of work ahead of me if I ever want to leave that reputation behind.’
‘Why would you want to leave it behind?’ Amber asked, narrowing her eyes as she continued to stare at him. ‘I mean, this is what you do, isn’t it? This is you. This is the way you live your life.’
‘Have you ever thought that I might actually want to give a proper relationship a go?’
Amber couldn’t help laughing. ‘Ha! Come on, Ryan. You’ve tried that before and it just doesn’t work. You don’t really want that…’
‘Hey, do you want to quit telling me what it is I want?’ He ran a hand through his hair, those incredible dark blue eyes of his full of confusion, which only served to make him look twice as handsome, Amber noticed. If that was possible. ‘Look, come out to dinner with me. Tonight.’
‘Why?’
‘Because I like you, Amber. I like being with you, I like the vibes you give off, and I even like the fact you’re a pain in the arse who refuses to give footballers a chance. And I can’t lie – the sex was amazing. Jesus, sweetheart, you have one killer body.’
Amber felt herself blush. What was she? Sixteen?
‘Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t want to see me again. Come on. Look me in the eye and tell me that was it, and if you can do that, well…’ He shrugged, ‘… end of story.’
She looked him right in the eye, but she couldn’t say it, could she? Because she wouldn’t mean it. ‘Okay,’ she sighed, rolling her eyes as though accepting a dinner date with Ryan Fisher was the world’s biggest chore, when really she felt elated that he’d told her all those things. Maybe he did deserve that chance she’d denied him on Thursday. ‘Dinner it is. Where?’
‘Franco’s. Do you know it? It’s in town…’
‘Yeah, I know it,’ Amber said, trying not to let the smile she was dying to let loose escape onto her face just yet. She didn’t want him to know she was actually looking forward to seeing him later. ‘I’ll meet you there. Eight-thirty?’
Ryan wasn’t used to women making the decisions quite as forcefully as she did, but on her it was a turn-on. He couldn’t help wondering if she brought that dominating streak into the bedroom, but maybe if he played his cards right tonight he’d find out.
‘Eight-thirty it is,’ he grinned, sticking his hands in his pockets. ‘Looking forward to it.’
Amber just gave him a small smile back then turned and walked away. Ryan had absolutely no idea why this woman had got to him, but she had. Maybe it was because she was just so different to all the other girls he was used to. Maybe it was because she didn’t fall at his feet with the click of a finger. He didn’t know, but whatever it was he wanted to find out more.
‘Great match, lad. You did me proud out there.’
Ryan swung round at the sound of the strong Geordie accent behind him, leaning back against the wall, sighing heavily. ‘Dad.’
‘I thought you would’ve been to see us, Ryan. Your mam’s been looking forward to having her boy back home after all these years.’
‘I’ve been busy.’
‘Too busy to spare a few minutes to come and see your mam and dad?’
Ryan looked at his father. ‘I don’t need the nagging, Dad. Mam treats me like I’m still a kid sometimes.’
‘With good reason, son. Because sometimes you act like it.’
Ryan continued to stare at his dad. ‘Those days are over now. Okay?’
‘I hope you’re right, Ryan. Still, at least you’re back home now. Back where you belong.’
Ryan looked at his dad through slightly narrowed eyes, but said nothing.
‘Your mam’s worried sick about you, lad.’
Ryan threw his head back and sighed again. ‘Jesus…’ He looked straight at his father, running a hand through his dark hair. ‘I’m fine, alright? Everything is just fine.’
‘Is it? After everything…’
‘It’s fine, Dad.’ Ryan’s voice left his father in no doubt that his son didn’t want to take this conversation any further. But that was easier said than done.
‘Your mam always told me that letting you settle in London was a bad idea. She blames me for everything…’
‘Christ, Dad, come on. None of it was your fault. It was nobody’s fault but mine. I got myself into all that shit.’
‘And I hope you’re well out of it now, son. It’s good that you’ve come back home.’
‘Where you can keep an eye on me? Is that it?’
‘If that’s what it takes, Ryan. Yes. I hear you’ve just bought a brand new flat down on the Quayside.’
Ryan looked at his dad, his hands jammed firmly in his pockets, not enjoying this unwelcome interrogation. ‘I need somewhere to live.’
‘The club had given you a perfectly good house to stay in. For as long as you needed it.’
‘I want my own place, okay?’
‘Is the city centre the most sensible choice of location, son? It’s a bit close to…’
‘That house, it wasn’t me,’ Ryan interrupted. ‘I wasn’t comfortable there.’
His father fixed him with a stare that demanded the truth. ‘Are you…?’
‘Am I, what?’ Ryan asked, his stare just as determined.
‘You know what I’m asking, Ryan.’
‘I’m getting there, Dad. That’s all you need to know.’
‘Aye, well, as long as you are, lad. As long as you are.’
‘Do I look alright?’ Amber asked Ronnie as he pulled up at the corner of the street where Franco’s restaurant was situated.
‘You look fine,’ Ronnie replied as he fiddled with his in-car MP3 player.
Amber looked at him. ‘Fine. I look fine?’
Ronnie stared at her. ‘Yeah. You look fine.’
Amber said nothing, just raised her eyebrows and gave him a wide-eyed look. Ronnie shrugged, genuinely confused. ‘What? What do you want me to say? Who the hell am I? Gok frigging Wan? You look great, okay? Is that better?’
Amber still said nothing, just pulled down the visor and checked her face in the small, side-lit mirror, running her tongue over her teeth just in case any pale pink lip gloss had found its way on there.
‘Do you know what you’re doing?’ Ronnie asked, finally finding a playlist he was happy with.
Amber looked at him. ‘Of course I know what I’m doing. I’m having dinner with Ryan Fisher.’
‘You know what I mean. I want to make sure you know just what it is you might be getting into. Although, if you want my opinion…’
‘Which I don’t.’
Ronnie ignored her. ‘If you want my opinion, I don’t think you should be getting into it at all.’
‘I’m not getting “into” anything, Ronnie.’
‘Well, with the greatest of respect, Amber, you already are into something when you sleep with somebody.’
‘So, what does that make our relationship then? Huh? Do you want to explain that one?’
Ronnie looked out of the window for a second. She kind of had him there.
‘No, didn’t think so. Because you can’t, can you? Look, Ronnie, like I said before, I’m not getting “into” anything. I’m just having dinner. That’s all. Ryan and I both know where we stand, and just because we appear to be doing things a little back to front, it doesn’t actually have to mean anything’s going on.’
‘Y’know, you might think you’re all hard-faced and nobody can tell you anything, but you’re still my best friend and I care about you, okay? And, let’s face it, where men are concerned you’re not exactly experienced, are you?’
‘Yeah, thanks for that, Ronnie.’
‘Amber, sweetheart… you said that all of this doesn’t have to mean that anything’s going on, but…’
‘But what?’ Amber asked, looking right into Ronnie’s eyes.
‘But… do you want something to happen? Even just a little bit?’
She sat back in the passenger seat of his black BMW, the dark leather interior cool against her skin. ‘Look, Ronnie, I know I’ve always said I really didn’t want to get involved with footballers, mainly because I assumed you were all like Ryan Fisher. But you proved me wrong, and I think Ryan might actually prove me wrong, too. I don’t know. Maybe I’m just getting softer, but I’m willing to see how tonight goes. People can change, y’know.’
Ronnie raised a concerned eyebrow. ‘You think so, huh? You think someone like Ryan Fisher is just going to change overnight? Don’t go rushing into anything, Amber. Please.’
‘It’s a bit late for that, isn’t it?’ Amber smiled, grabbing her handbag and opening the car door. ‘I mean, like you said before, we’ve already slept together, haven’t we?’
Ronnie gave a resigned sigh, smiling back at her as she leaned in through the open passenger window, blowing him a kiss. ‘Have a good time, kiddo.’
‘I’ll try,’ she winked at him before waving him off, standing still for a few seconds, just to compose herself. Again. She seemed to be composing herself a lot where Ryan Fisher was concerned.
The restaurant was busy when she finally walked in, but then it was Saturday night in the centre of town. She’d never actually been inside Franco’s before, mainly because it was the haunt of local celebrities and footballers and therefore the price range was a little out of her league, but she’d always wondered what it would be like to eat there. She was also one of life’s truly nosy people, and to be able to get a glimpse at the clientele that frequented this famous local restaurant was something she was particularly looking forward to.
Sliding her clutch bag under her arm, she scanned the room as she waited at the front desk for the maitre d’, but she couldn’t see Ryan anywhere. What if he’d had a better offer from someone younger, thinner and blonde? She could do without that kind of kick in the teeth.
‘You look amazing.’
She swung round at the sound of that now-familiar voice, trying to keep the smile off her face as she saw him standing there behind her. Dressed in a dark suit and white shirt, no tie, and that sexy, messed-up hair that he really was carrying off so well, it was all Amber could do to stop a sharp intake of breath from escaping. As usual, Ryan Fisher looked hot. Handsome, sexy, young and dangerous. Cocky, arrogant, selfish and smug. All things that described this man in front of her, but Amber was willing to give him that chance he seemed so set on having. But if he blew it, then she was walking away. No second chances, no lame explanations. She was breaking the biggest rule she’d ever set herself and if he gave her cause to regret that then this was going no further.
‘I was at the bar,’ he went on, his hands in his pockets, a smile on his handsome face. She couldn’t help noticing how sexy that beard of his really was. He suited it. It made her think of a young George Best in his heyday, and then she couldn’t help hoping that he didn’t resemble him in other ways, too. Because she’d heard the stories, listened to the rumours. ‘Do you want a drink before we get settled at our table?’
‘Please,’ Amber smiled, positive she was breaking out in some kind of hot flush. She was only eleven years older than him but she felt like some kind of Mrs. Robinson figure. She felt as if all eyes were on her, which they probably weren’t. But they could quite possibly all be on Ryan. ‘And make it a large one.’
