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‘If this is an indication of the way you mean to go on, whenever your will is crossed, then...’
His eyes widened. He shook his head and ran his fingers through his hair.
‘I didn’t mean to scare you. Please...’ he waved a hand at the chair ‘...sit down again and I will try to talk this over calmly.’
‘Only if you sit down, too.’
He frowned, then nodded.
Gingerly, she sat in the chair he’d indicated and he sat down, too.
‘Look, Miss Carpenter. I have a terrible, hasty temper. Bane of my life, actually, but I do try not to let it govern my actions, the way it once did. I am sorry I let it get the better of me this morning. Ungentlemanly of me.’ He lowered his head for an instant, the picture of contrition, before lifting it, looking directly into her eyes, and saying, ‘Do you think you could find it in your heart to forgive my...outburst and start this interview again?’
She could hardly believe it. He didn’t appear to believe, the way her father had, that it was his God-given right to harangue a female, when he had her behind closed doors. On the contrary, he’d said it was ‘ungentlemanly’ behaviour. And had asked her to forgive him.
How could she do anything but forgive him? When she nodded, mutely, he heaved a sigh of relief.
‘Thank you. It is just that...this means so much to me. And I was so certain you felt the same way I did. That the fact you were a touch reluctant to get married would make us...allies. Then the cool way you talked about pulling the rug from under my feet just made me—’ He broke off, shaking his head as though he didn’t have the words to describe what he felt.
She felt every bit as confused as he looked.
‘But if you don’t truly want to get married, then...’
He heaved another sigh and ran his fingers through his unruly curls again.
‘I don’t truly want to get married, no,’ he admitted. ‘But I cannot see any other way out. But it’s not because I’m in debt, or anything of that nature. My trustees have done a sterling job of managing my capital, up till now. Of course the trust will wind up when I get married,’ he said gloomily. ‘So I’m going to have to learn all that side of things myself now.’
‘And you don’t want to.’
He shrugged. ‘In some ways it will be good to take up the reins myself instead of letting others drive the team. But I’m going to be far busier with that sort of thing than I’d like.’ He slouched back into his seat, his expression mulish.
‘Well, then, why? If it isn’t money? And you aren’t really ready to...take up the reins...’ And it certainly wasn’t because he’d fallen in love with her. There was nothing lover-like in the way he’d reacted to her rejection. Besides, men only fell for beautiful girls.
‘I suppose I should blame Ashe for suggesting I court a girl with brains,’ he said cryptically. ‘You aren’t going to be fobbed off with the usual nonsense, are you?’
‘Nonsense?’
He tilted his head to one side and made a wry attempt at a smile.
‘Nothing of nonsense about you at all, is there? Very well,’ he said, leaning forward and clasping his hands between his knees. ‘I will take you into my confidence. I hadn’t meant to until after we were married, but I can see you’re unlikely to marry me at all unless I give you a very good reason for me acting in a way that must make you think I’ve taken leave of my senses. I have a sister, you see.’
She didn’t see, but before she could say so he leapt to his feet and, clearly in some agitation, paced away from her. ‘Or, to be more precise, a half-sister.’ He had to stop when he got to the window, but instead of turning round, he stayed just where he was, his shoulders hunched, and started fiddling with the curtain tie-backs.
‘My mother died when I was eight, as I told you before, and then my father remarried pretty swiftly. Before another year was out, she presented him with a daughter. The marriage lasted a few more years before he died. And then my stepmother—’ He started in surprise as an ornamental tassel came off in his hand. He laid it down on the windowsill and, taking a step back from further temptation, turned towards Mary and kept his eyes fixed firmly on her as he took up his tale again.
‘My stepmother remarried. She...she was only the daughter of our village grocer. But she was beautiful. Her parents, I found out some years later, were so thrilled to have her elevated to the ranks of the peerage, that they pushed her into accepting my father’s proposal. She tried to make the best of it, but she was never very happy with him. Anyway, the minute Father died, she took up with the man she’d loved all along. A pretty decent fellow, actually. At least, he was good to me. Paid me more attention than my own father ever had, to tell you the truth, but that’s beside the point. He was a nobody, that’s what my own father’s family said. And they were correct. He hadn’t a title. Little money. No land, nothing of that sort, but...’
He turned and paced up and down, raking his fingers through his curls yet again.
‘It’s all such a tangle it’s hard to know how to explain it. You see, my legal guardians didn’t actually want me to live with them, but they didn’t want me contaminated by the man they called a commoner, either. So they sent me away to school. But you know what? My stepmother, my half-sister and her new stepfather were the only ones to show a real interest in me. Their letters kept me from... Well, school can be a pretty harsh sort of place. I got through because I knew how to defend myself. Thanks to the very man my guardians said I shouldn’t go near. He taught me to box.’ He glanced down at his fists, which he’d clenched the moment he’d mentioned his school.
‘It was to his home I went during school vacations. With him, and my stepmother and Julia I felt I had the nearest thing to a home. I was...very cut up when he died. And for his sake, I kept in contact with his sons. The sons my half-sister’s mother bore him.’
She blinked. He caught the bewildered expression in her eyes, at the end of one of his circuits of the room, and pulled a wry face.
‘I warned you my family ties are complicated. But that is only the start. You see, after he died, she—that is my stepmother—was left in slightly tricky circumstances. There was talk of taking Julia away from her and having her brought up by her father’s—my father’s family. Only she hadn’t been all that impressed by the way they’d treated me up to then. So when she got an offer of marriage from yet another titled man, she agreed, in an attempt to keep them all, Julia and her two sons, together as a family. Following it so far?’
‘Yes, I think so.’
‘Well, although financially she did well, she was even more miserable with her third husband than she was with my father. Died giving him his heir. And then...well, for the next few years it felt as though every long vacation I went back to a different marital home as either the husband or the wife died and remarried. It was like living through some bizarre form of farce, with a different infant squalling in a crib, being introduced to me as my new brother or sister, by an adult I was supposed to call Mother or Father.’
‘Hold on,’ said Mary. ‘Why were you calling all these strangers Mother? I don’t quite understand.’
‘Well, nobody really wanted to take on Julia’s brothers, because of who their father was.’
‘The decent, but common man.’
‘That’s him. But they all wanted to keep Julia under their wing, because she has a great deal of money settled on her, and whoever has wardship gets to control it. And wherever she went, I went, too. Because—well, I didn’t have anywhere else to call home. And by that time I’d gained a bit of a reputation for being a hellion. Not the trustees or any of my father’s extended family thought it worth the bother of attempting to discipline me, or cross my will. If I wanted to take myself off to the wilds of Wiltshire, or Yorkshire or Devon so I could be with my half-sister, they were only too glad to see the back of me.’
Mary’s heart went out to him, or rather, the abandoned, unloved little boy he’d been. No wonder he went a bit wild. No wonder he made a point of going where he truly was wanted. Where he would be loved.
‘I...I see....’
‘No, you don’t.’ He shook his head and grinned at her. ‘My family connections are so incredibly complicated that even I cannot keep track of all the people who claim kinship with me these days. Suffice it to say that Julia is the only one of them I give a rat’s a— I mean, care very much about.’
She ought to have been offended by the way he’d almost slipped into vulgarity. But she was beginning to find his very clumsiness of speech rather endearing. In a way, he was treating her with a unique form of respect by saying whatever came into his head, rather than trying to bamboozle her with glib speeches. As was the way he pulled himself up, without her having to so much as lift a brow in reproof, either.
‘Very well,’ she said. ‘Go on.’
‘Thank you.’ He sat down in the chair he’d used before, leaned his elbows on his knees and clasped his hands.
‘Now, the thing is, the woman who is currently standing in the place of Julia’s stepmother is about to get married again. And the man she’s marrying is...’ He scowled. ‘Well, put it this way. I wouldn’t want any innocent girl to have to live under the same roof as him. Julia’s fifteen now and pretty as a picture. And Lord... Perhaps I shouldn’t tell you his name.’ He frowned, rubbing his thumb across his nose. ‘Although, if people didn’t gossip about him, I never would have found out that he’s assuming nobody cares what becomes of Julia, given the way she’s been passed round like a parcel up till now.’
‘Oh, I see.’ Mary leaned forward, clasping her own hands. ‘By marrying, you are launching a rescue. You plan to provide a stable, safe environment for her to live in. That’s...’ she smiled at him a little mistily ‘...that is truly noble of you.’
He sat up straight again. ‘Is it? I hadn’t thought of it like that.’ He shook his head. ‘I just couldn’t think what else to do. I spent hours discussing Julia’s future with my lawyers, and hers. My first thought was to make an attempt to be declared her legal guardian. I’m pretty nearly old enough now, you see. But found out that would take too much time. Couldn’t very well drag her out of the house and take her back to live in my bachelor lodgings either, while the lawyers worked through all the red tape. It would look damned peculiar. Probably cause the very kind of talk I don’t want her exposed to. But if I got married, they said, and moved back to Mayfield, it would seem perfectly natural to invite her to live with us. Reunite the Durant family in the ancestral home, sort of thing.’
And if she didn’t marry him now, he’d have to abandon that plan. Start all over again trying to find someone else to become his convenient wife. For that was what he wanted, she finally saw. Just a woman to make his rescue of his sister appear respectable and above board.
Could she really let him down, this way, after he’d confided the delicacy of his sister’s plight to her? Could she let the girl, Julia, down, for that matter? She knew what it felt like to be all alone in the world, a burden to everyone, yet nobody’s responsibility. Though she’d never been in the kind of peril that faced Julia. She simply wasn’t pretty enough.
And then there were the Pargetters, who’d been so kind to her when she was just about at the end of her tether. They were banking on her to launch Dotty and Lotty into society. Give them the chance their beauty and vivacity deserved.
Could she trust him though, to keep his word? To grant her an allowance and treat her with respect?
From the way this interview had gone so far she thought, yes, perhaps she could.
And as for his temper, which seemed to flare out of nowhere—well, at least he regarded it as the bane of his life and tried to keep it in check.
And apologised when he couldn’t.
‘Very well,’ she said. ‘I will help you. Of course I will, now I understand what is at stake.’
‘Thank you.’ He heaved a sigh of relief. Reached across the small gap that divided them, took both her hands in his and gave them a little squeeze.
‘I have been at my wit’s end. I couldn’t tell anyone of my fears for her, in case it started the very kind of gossip that would be almost as bad as the fate I was afraid would await her if she ever got into Lord Wakefield’s clutches. Now we can nip any schemes he might have been hatching in the bud. But...you must understand, time is of the essence. I want a place made ready for her to come to, a place she can feel safe, before her current stepmother marries him.’
‘Which is why our wedding must take place so soon.’
‘That’s it. In fact, I was hoping we could get the knot tied tomorrow, then travel straight down to Mayfield and look the place over.’
‘Mayfield? Why, is there something wrong with it?’
‘I shouldn’t think so. But I do want to just make sure before I tell Julia she can move in. You see, when my father died, I was too young to live there alone, so, as I mentioned, my guardians packed me off to school and let the place out to tenants. Better than letting it stand empty, they reckoned, and renting it out paid for its upkeep.’
‘Oh, dear. Are you going to have to evict the current tenants? It’s so near to Christmas....’
‘And it may very well snow, too.’ He chuckled. ‘No, I’m not going to play the part of an evil landlord, don’t worry about that,’ he said, chucking her chin. ‘Fortunately, a couple of years ago, when it fell vacant, I told the letting agent I didn’t want them to find another tenant. Don’t need the money and have never liked the thought of strangers living there. Good country round about, too. Had some thoughts of doing a bit of entertaining, having some fellows down for the hunting, that sort of thing, though I never got round to it. And just as I told you before, the trustees never bother arguing when they can see I’ve made up my mind. For some reason, they stopped letting out Durant House, too.
‘Oh, hang it! I suppose I shall have to reside there once I’m married and have Julia in tow.’
‘You don’t like the place?’
‘It’s like a cross between a barn and a mausoleum,’ he said gloomily.
‘Can you not make it more comfortable?’
‘I don’t see how.’
‘W-well, I’ve never lived anywhere that cannot be made more...cheerful, by the strategic placement of furniture and a lick of paint.’
‘If you can make Durant House anything like approaching cheerful,’ he said fervently, ‘I will consider myself for ever in your debt.’
‘R-really?’
He pounced on the hopeful note she couldn’t help trembling through her voice.
‘I’ll give you a completely free hand. In fact, I would prefer it if you didn’t bother me with any of the details of the refurbishment at all.’
‘You are willing to give me a totally free hand in the redecoration of your town house?’
‘Mayfield, too, if you think you’d enjoy it. The only stipulation I will make is that I want it to feel like somewhere Julia can really feel at home.’
‘A...a home.’ She pressed her hands to her cheeks. ‘You want me to turn your ancestral seat into a home?’
‘Actually,’ he said, as though it had just occurred to him, ‘it’s traditional for the new bride to make some changes.’
‘Oh,’ she breathed, her hands clasped at her bosom now. She’d asked him for one room to call her own and he was presenting her with two whole houses.
‘You’d really enjoy doing that?’
‘Yes. Very much.’
‘Good. Told you I wanted you to be happy! And if buying new carpets and wallpaper will do it, then so much the better. Though...’ He rubbed his nose with his thumb as though a thought had just struck him. ‘If your taste really runs counter to mine, I might just have to reserve a room or two for myself.’
‘I wouldn’t dream of making you uncomfortable anywhere in your own homes,’ she protested.
‘You won’t,’ he said firmly. ‘This will be a very... That is, I’ve already told you I don’t want us to be in each other’s pockets all the time. You can go your way and I’ll go mine. Within limits.’ He frowned. Then shook his head. ‘No, no, never mind. I trust you to set a good example for Julia to follow. You won’t go creating any sort of scandal, will you?’
‘I...I don’t think I’d know how to,’ she said, a little stung by his warning, even though he had retracted it almost at once.
He smiled at her again. A smile so warm and full of approval that she quite forgave his blunt speaking yet again. It was just the way he was and she was going to have to get used to it.
‘So, you have no objection to marrying tomorrow and heading straight down there, then?’
‘What?’ She wasn’t sure how they’d moved from living separate, but parallel lives, the way she’d heard many tonnish people did, to rushing into the wedding itself.
‘Your aunt tried to make some objection about not having time to get a trousseau together, but do you really need one?’
‘N-no, of course not.’ She hadn’t even thought about it. All that had exercised her mind since the day before had been how to avoid marriage altogether.
He frowned. ‘You do mind. I can tell. Your aunt is right. It is downright selfish of me to deny you all the folderol most brides have. You’ll want a new gown at the least, and shoes.’
‘I...I think I could contrive to get something you won’t be ashamed to see me in, by tomorrow,’ she said.
His face lit up. ‘I’ll pay for it, of course. Send whatever bills you run up to me. Well, I think that’s all settled, then.’
He reached into his pocket and pulled out a sheet of paper. Having scanned it swiftly, he thrust it back, his face flushing. ‘You wouldn’t believe how many things a chap has to remember,’ he said, fishing around in another pocket, from which he produced a second list.
‘No wonder most women insist on having several weeks to organise a wedding. Ah. Yes, thought so,’ he said, thrusting the list back into his pocket. ‘There is just one more thing I do need to discuss with you, before we tie the knot.’
He cleared his throat.
‘This may be a businesslike arrangement, but it won’t be a paper marriage.’
‘I don’t follow.’
‘To be blunt, I need an heir. I’ve thought about this a lot, since...well, since I decided on marriage. And I’ve come to the conclusion we should get that side of things started straight away. I can tell you’re quite a bashful sort of girl and that you might think I ought to give you time to become accustomed to the idea of being married, before I make any demands of that nature. But it’s like this...’
He leaned forward and took hold of both her hands in his. ‘At the moment, we both like each other. Don’t we?’
When she nodded, shyly, he smiled. ‘Now, the sad fact is marriages can turn sour remarkably quickly. I’ve seen it time and time again. If we get to the point where we cannot stand even being in the same room as one another...well, let’s just say attempting to get an heir in those conditions won’t be pleasant. Not for either of us. But at the moment, when we kiss...’
He looked at her mouth. Her lips tingled in remembrance of the kisses they’d shared the day before. And then every other part of her began to tingle, as well.
He was probably right. She’d grown up in a house where husband and wife could barely stand to be in the same room as each other. Whereas now...
Well, it really sounded as though he wouldn’t try to suffocate her. He had at least two houses that she knew of. So they needn’t ever be cooped up in a cramped little cottage, resenting the very air that each breathed. And they weren’t marrying for love, so they couldn’t fall out of it and grow bitter and resentful.
