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Rachel patted her daughter’s back. “Then you can stay up here on the balcony and look down on the peons and paparazzi?”
“Something like that,” Matt laughed. “Actually, I had our dinner set up out there if you’d like to head out. The view is breathtaking.”
Rachel moved toward the open French doors. “I don’t know if it’s safe to have Ellie out here.”
As she stepped outside, she gasped as she took in everything he’d done. “Matt, my word! What didn’t you think of?”
Matt shrugged, wondering if he’d gone overboard. Hell, he hadn’t known what to do, so in those instances his default was always to do everything. His motto had always been “Better to have too much than not enough.”
“I wasn’t sure if she used a high chair,” he stated, stepping over the threshold to join her. “When I called my assistant for reinforcements, I told her to ask for the works. The guy came to set all of this up and asked how many kids I had.”
Rachel laughed as she turned and surveyed the spacious balcony. Matt couldn’t take his eyes off her or her daughter. He wasn’t even sure how to feel looking at Billy’s child, but when he saw that sweet girl, he really only saw Ellie.
Guilt slithered in slowly from so many different angles. He shouldn’t still have been lusting after his late friend’s wife, but there was clearly no stopping that. But he also shouldn’t be wanting to get closer to Rachel knowing full well that he wasn’t looking for a family or any type of long-term commitment.
Being married to a career didn’t leave much time for feeding into a relationship. Besides, he couldn’t lose Rachel as a friend. The risks were too high that that was exactly what would happen if he pressed on with his pent up desires.
Rachel still hadn’t said anything as she continued to take in everything. One area of the stretched balcony looked as if a department store had set up their latest display of baby gear. High chair, Pack ’n Play, play mat, toys, stationary swing...
“I don’t know the age for any of this stuff, so if you need something else let me know and I’ll call—”
“No.” Rachel turned back around to face him, her eyes filled with unshed tears. “This is... I don’t even have words. You invited me for dinner and thought of everything for Ellie.”
His gaze darted to the child in question. Her wide brown eyes, exactly like Rachel’s, were focused on him. She clutched a little yellow blanket against her chest and huddled against her mother for security. Something shifted inside Matt, an unknown emotion he couldn’t label and wasn’t sure he wanted to explore.
“She’s beautiful.” Matt turned his gaze back to Rachel as a shimmer of awareness flowed through him. “Just like her mother.”
She blinked and glanced away, never one to take a compliment. That had never stopped him from offering them. Even when the three of them had all hung out, back in the day, Matt would tell her she looked nice or he liked her hair. There hadn’t been a time he recalled hearing Billy compliment his wife, and Matt hadn’t been able to help himself. Billy had been a great friend, yet from everything Matt could tell, he had been a lousy husband.
But really, all of this was a moot point. Because regardless of the state of their marriage, Matt knew he shouldn’t be trying to make a play for Billy’s wife. He had regrets in his life, but this might be the most asshole-ish thing he’d ever done. Still, Matt had never backed away from what he wanted...and he wanted the hell out of Rachel Kincaid.
“Who else is eating with us?” Rachel asked as she stared at the spread he’d ordered.
“Just us. I ordered all of your favorites. Well, what I remember you ordering in the past, but I didn’t know what you were in the mood for.”
Rachel wrinkled her nose. “I’m a boring creature of habit. I pretty much stick with pizza, pasta or any other carb. This all looks amazing.”
He took a step forward and offered a smile. “You’re not boring,” he corrected. “There’s nothing wrong with knowing what you want. I’m the same way. I see something I want, I make it mine.”
Damn it. He needed to calm the hell down. Hadn’t he told himself to get control over his desires?
But saying and doing were clearly two different things because he couldn’t stop himself. Rachel pulled out emotions in him he couldn’t even describe.
Her eyes widened. “Are you talking about food or something else?”
Matt shrugged, forcing himself to take a step back and not get her any more flustered. “We’ll discuss food. For now.”
Rachel moved to the Pack ’n Play and sat Ellie down. The little girl whimpered for a moment before Rachel pulled a doll from the diaper bag on her shoulder. Damn it, why hadn’t he taken that from her?
“Let me help.” He took the bag from her shoulder. “Damn, woman, what do you have in here?”
Rachel straightened and turned. “It’s amazing how one little person can need so many things. Diapers, wipes, butt paste—”
“Pardon?”
She laughed and went on. “I have an extra change of clothes in case of blowouts, food, snacks, toys, pain reliever for her swollen gums...”
“I don’t know if I want any more information about the butt paste and blowouts.” Matt set the diaper bag next to the door. “I’ll fix you a plate. The restaurant downstairs serves some of the best food I’ve ever had and I’ve been all around the world. I ordered their rosemary bread because when I called, they said they’d just taken it from the oven.”
“Well, you clearly know me,” she said with a wide smile that punched him with another dose of lust. “If it’s carbs, I’m in.”
“Do you still have a love for key lime pie?”
Rachel rolled her eyes. “If you mean do I still inhale it like it’s my job, then yes. I don’t even care about the added pounds. Key lime pie is so worth it.”
“You’re still just as stunning as always, Rachel. No pounds could change that.”
She crossed her arms over her chest and tilted her head. “I’m starting to see why you were the recipient of the most prestigious bachelor title. You’re still quite the charmer.”
He might try to charm other women—well, he didn’t try; he flat-out did charm them. But with Rachel, he wasn’t trying. He always spoke the truth, always wanted her to know her value and how special she was.
If you cared so much, you wouldn’t have let a year pass since seeing her.
“I’ve missed you,” she stated, as if reading his mind. “I miss our friendship.”
Friendship. Yes. That’s the only label their relationship could have, because she was a widow, a single mother and she wasn’t looking to jump back into anything. Honestly, he wasn’t looking to fill the role of Daddy, either, but that didn’t stop the fact he wanted Rachel as more than a friend.
Likely she’d thrown that out there as a reminder, but he dismissed the words. He’d respect her if she flat-out wasn’t interested, but he had to know. He had to know if she was interested in him. He needed to find out if she burned for him as much as he for her. Would she even want to attempt anything physical knowing he wasn’t ready for anything more?
Why did this all have to be so damn complicated? Oh, right. Because he’d spent years building and attempting to ignore these emotions.
“I’d better eat before she starts fussing,” Rachel told him as she went to take a seat. “There’s always a small window of opportunity and I rarely get warm food because I feed her first.”
Matt urged Rachel toward the table and pulled her chair out. “If she fusses, I’m sure I can hold her and entertain her while you finish, or I can feed her. Regardless, you are eating right now while it’s warm, and there will be no arguments.”
Rachel looked up at him and quirked one brow. “You ready to play Uncle Matt?”
Ouch. That stung. He wasn’t sure what he wanted to be called...then again, he hadn’t given it much thought. He was having difficulty processing much of anything with that creamy shoulder of Rachel’s on display and her familiar floral fragrance teasing his senses.
“I win over billion-dollar mergers before breakfast,” he joked. “I’m pretty sure I can handle a little person.”
Rachel snorted. “Don’t get too cocky. It’s harder than it looks.”
“I never doubted that for a minute,” he corrected. “Now eat. There’s plenty.”
Once she took a seat, Matt eased it closer to the table. He immediately started filling her plate with rosemary bread and Alfredo over penne and chicken, then filled her glass with pinot grigio.
“You put all of this together pretty quick considering you just asked me today.”
Matt set her food in front of her before taking a seat across the table. “Just a few calls and the right connections. Why wouldn’t I go all out for a friend I haven’t seen in a year?”
Her stare leveled his. “I’d think a cup of coffee or a stroll in the park would’ve sufficed.”
Matt reached across the table and squeezed her fingers. Her eyes immediately darted to their joined hands. “You have every right to be angry with me.”
“I’m not angry,” she retorted.
Matt raked his thumb across the silky ridge of her knuckles before easing back. He noticed she didn’t wear her wedding band any longer and part of him swelled with approval and excitement.
“Hurt then. You can’t lie to me, Rachel. Billy’s death did something to both of us.”
Like the fact he couldn’t be the one to console her. He simply...damn it, he couldn’t. He’d wanted too much for too long so he’d had to let her go and pray someone else offered the comfort she needed. Because if he’d had to hold her day after day, night after night until her pain had eased...
“I was hurt,” she admitted. “I still am, actually. Care to tell me why you just disappeared?”
“I texted.”
Such a lame defense, yet the words left his mouth before he could stop himself. Out of everything and everyone in his life, Rachel was the one he’d barely been able to control himself around.
“I don’t really want to dredge up the past right now. I want answers from you, but let’s not do it tonight.” She picked up her fork and offered a typical dimpled smile. “Billy was a big part of my life, but I’ve worked hard at moving on. I’m trying to make a future for Ellie and me. Always looking back isn’t the way to do that.”
He had to hand it to her. She’d hurt from her husband’s death, from Matt’s absence, from being thrust into being a single mother, yet she forced herself to trudge on.
“So, you’re finishing your degree,” he started, hoping to keep the topic on her life. “Where do you go from there?”
Rachel stabbed a piece of pasta and lifted a shoulder. “Right now I’m helping Alexis with the charity auction for the Pancreatic Cancer Research Foundation.”
Impressed, Matt nodded in silent admiration. “What’s the auction? Do you have donations from area businesses?”
Rachel dropped her fork, pulled the napkin from her lap and dabbed the corners of her mouth. “We’re auctioning men.”
Matt stilled. “Excuse me?”
Those bright, beautiful eyes locked on his across the table. There was that mischievous gleam he’d seen from her in the past. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know more.
“We’re having a bachelor auction. Care to be Bachelor Fifteen?”
Four (#u41330599-44bf-5b0c-8a72-e96076c61cd8)
Way to go. Nothing like blurting out her thoughts without easing into the request. Granted she’d promised Alexis she’d ask Matt for the favor, but Rachel probably could’ve done a better lead in.
“Bachelor Fifteen.”
The words slid slowly through his sultry, kissable lips as he set his fork down and continued to hold her gaze without so much as blinking. She really needed to not stare at his mouth, and she absolutely should not be imagining them on hers.
Rachel cringed. “So, we need another bachelor and we were wanting one that would be fairly popular, and you came to town, we’re friends, you’ve got that new title and...”
He sat still as stone.
“I’m rambling,” she muttered. “You don’t want the hype or the press. I get it. Forget I asked.”
Rachel focused on the potatoes on her plate. Carbs were always the answer, especially when she’d just verbally assaulted their friendship.
“Is that why you came?” he asked.
Rachel immediately met his gaze. “What? No. I wanted to see you. I wanted you to meet Ellie. Earlier I was working on the auction and Alexis and I started talking and your name came up.”
Matt offered that cocky, familiar smirk. “Is that right?”
He was clearly intrigued by the idea of being the topic of conversation, but she wasn’t about to feed that ego.
“But don’t feel obligated to agree just because we’re friends. In fact, forget I asked.”
Rachel started to reach for her sweet tea just as Ellie let out a cry of frustration. Pushing back in her chair, Rachel came to her feet, but Matt was quicker. He stood and crossed to the Pack ’n Play, reached down and lifted Ellie out.
Unable to look away, Rachel stared at the way Matt’s large hands held on to her daughter. Ellie’s little mouth slid into a frown as she stared at the stranger. She reached up and patted her tiny fingers against his mouth.
“Here, let me take her.”
Matt shook his head as he made his way back to the table. “She’s fine. Enjoy your dinner and we can discuss this auction some more.”
Rachel eased back into her seat as Matt sat back down in his own chair. Immediately Ellie’s arm smacked Matt’s glass over, spilling his drink into his plate of food.
“I’m so sorry.” Rachel jumped up and grabbed her daughter before handing Matt her cloth napkin. “Let me go inside and get a towel. Go finish my plate and I’ll get this cleaned up—”
Matt grabbed her arm. “Relax. Nobody’s hurt here and it’s just a spill. Maybe we should go inside where Ellie can play on the floor and we can sit on the sofa and have dinner?”
Rachel wanted to gather her child and their things and leave to save further embarrassment, but she knew that would be rude after all the trouble he’d gone to. So against her better instincts, she nodded.
“I think she’s getting hungry,” she replied. “Let me feed her and then I’ll help clean and carry things inside.”
“Take care of her. I’ll take care of everything else.”
Rachel stared for a moment until she realized he was serious. She couldn’t help but think back to Billy, who hadn’t wanted kids, who’d been flat out angry over the pregnancy. Yet here was Matt offering to care for Ellie while Rachel did something as simple as eat her dinner.
She shouldn’t compare the two men. Sure they were friends, but they’d always been opposite. Billy had been the adventurer, the wanderer, which had been the initial draw for Rachel.
Matt was just around for a good time. He was content in Dallas, happy with life and work. He was well-grounded and only got away to travel to Galloway Cove.
Who wouldn’t be happy owning their own island? At this point in her life, Rachel just wanted to own her own home, not the house Billy had bought and not some place her in-laws wanted her to have. She wanted to do life her way.
Several moments later, Ellie had been fed. After cleaning her up, Rachel scooted the coffee table off to the far wall and left an open area for Ellie to play in without hitting her head on the furniture.
Matt came back in and quickly had their food all set up, acting as if an infant hadn’t just turned his steak and potatoes into tea soup.
“I’m really sorry about that,” Rachel offered as he sat on the sofa next to her.
“Why do you keep apologizing? Just because I don’t have children doesn’t mean I’m going to get angry over an accident.”
