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PS, I Love You
PS, I Love You
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PS, I Love You

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‘He’s married, honey,’ Elizabeth passed on the message.

‘Hollywood marriages …’ Ciara mumbled.

‘Are the two of you on your own?’ Holly asked.

‘Frank is down the pub and Declan is at college.’

‘College? But it’s ten o’clock at night!’ Holly laughed. Declan was probably out somewhere doing something illegal and using college as an excuse. She didn’t think her mum would be so gullible to believe that line, especially after having four other children.

‘Oh, he’s a very hard worker when he puts his mind to it, Holly. He’s working on some project. I don’t know what it is; I don’t listen half the time.’

‘Mmm,’ Holly replied, not believing a word of it.

‘Anyway, my future son-in-law is back on television so I must be off,’ Elizabeth laughed. ‘Would you like to come round and join us?’

‘Thanks but no, I’m OK here.’

‘All right, love, but if you change your mind you know where we are. Bye, dear.’

Back to her empty, silent house.

Holly woke up the next morning still fully dressed and lying on her bed. She could feel herself slipping into her old habits again. All her positive thoughts of the past few weeks were melting away bit by bit every day. It was so bloody tiring trying to be happy all the time and she just didn’t have the energy any more. Who cared if the house was a mess? Nobody but she was going to see it, and she certainly didn’t care one way or the other. Who cared if she didn’t wear make-up or wash for a week? She had no intention of impressing anyone. The only guy she was seeing regularly was the pizza delivery boy, and she even had to tip him to make him smile. Who bloody cared?

Her phone vibrated beside her, signalling a text message. It was from Sharon.

Club Diva no 36700700

Think bout it. Wud b fun.

Do it 4 Gerry?

Gerry’s bloody dead, she felt like texting back. But ever since she had begun opening the envelopes he didn’t feel dead to her. It was as though he was just away on holiday and he was writing her letters so he wasn’t really gone. Well, the very least she could do was ring the club and suss out the situation. That didn’t mean she had to go through with it.

She dialled the number and a man answered. She couldn’t think of anything to say and quickly hung up again. Oh, come on, Holly, she told herself, it’s really not that difficult. Just say a friend is interested in singing.

Holly braced herself and pressed redial.

The same voice answered, ‘Club Diva.’

‘Hi, I was wondering if you do karaoke nights there?’

‘Yes, we do. They are on a …’ she heard him leafing through some pages, ‘yeah, sorry, they’re on a Thursday.’

‘Thursday?’

‘No, sorry, sorry, hold on …’ He leafed through some pages again. ‘No, they’re on a Tuesday night.’

‘Are you sure?’

‘Yes, they are definitely on a Tuesday.’

‘OK, em, well, I was wondering if, em …’ Holly took a deep breath and began the sentence again. ‘My friend might be interested in singing and she was wondering what she would have to do?’

There was a long pause on the other end.

‘Hello?’ Was this person stupid?

‘Yeah, sorry, I don’t actually organise the karaoke nights so …’

‘OK.’ Holly was losing her temper. It had taken a lot to summon up the courage to actually make the call and some underqualified unhelpful little twit wasn’t going to ruin it for her. ‘Well, is there anyone there who might have a clue?’

‘Eh, no, there isn’t. The club isn’t actually open yet. It’s very early in the morning still,’ came the sarcastic response.

‘Well, thank you very much. You’ve been a terrific help,’ she matched his sarcasm.

‘Excuse me, if you can just bear with me for a moment, I’ll try and find out for you.’ Holly was put on hold and was forced to listen to ‘Greensleeves’ for the next five minutes.

‘Hello? Are you still there?’

‘Barely,’ she said angrily.

‘OK, I’m very sorry about the delay but I just made a phone call there. What’s your friend’s name?’

Holly froze; she hadn’t planned on this. Well, maybe she could just give her name and then get ‘her friend’ to call back and cancel if she changed her mind.

‘Em, her name is Holly Kennedy.’

‘OK, well, it’s actually a karaoke competition on Tuesday nights. It goes on for a month and every week two people out of ten are chosen till the last week of the month, where the six people sing again in the final.’

Holly gulped and felt butterflies in her tummy. She didn’t want to do this.

‘But unfortunately,’ he continued, ‘the names have all been entered a few months in advance so you can tell your friend that maybe she could try again at Christmas. That’s when the next competition is on.’

‘Oh, OK.’

‘By the way, the name Holly Kennedy rings a bell. Would that be Declan Kennedy’s sister?’

‘Eh, yeah. Why, do you know her?’ asked a shocked Holly.

‘I wouldn’t say I know her I just met her briefly here the other night with her brother.’

Was Declan going around introducing girls as his sister? The sick and twisted little … No, that couldn’t be right.

‘Declan played a gig in Club Diva?’

‘No, no,’ the man laughed, ‘he played with his band downstairs in the basement.’

Holly quickly digested the information until the facts finally clicked in place.

‘Is Club Diva in Hogan’s?’

He laughed again. ‘Yeah, it’s on the top floor. Maybe I should advertise a bit more!’

‘Is that Daniel?’ Holly blurted out and then kicked herself for being so stupid.

‘Eh, yeah, do I know you?’

‘Em, no! No, you don’t! Holly just mentioned you in conversation, that’s all.’ Then she realised how that sounded. ‘Very briefly in conversation,’ she added. ‘She said you gave her a stool.’ Holly began hitting her head softly against the wall.

Daniel laughed again. ‘Oh, OK, well, tell her if she wants to sing in the karaoke at Christmas I can put her name down now for it. You wouldn’t believe the amount of people that want to sign up.’

‘Really?’ Holly said weakly. She felt like a fool.

‘Oh, by the way, who am I speaking to?’

Holly paced her bedroom floor. ‘Em, Sharon. You’re speaking to Sharon.’

‘OK, Sharon, well, I have your number on caller ID so I’ll call you if anyone backs out.’

‘OK, thanks a lot.’

And he hung up.

Holly leaped into bed, throwing the duvet over her head as she felt her face burn with embarrassment. She hid under the covers, cursing herself for being such a bimbo. Ignoring the phone ringing, she tried to convince herself she hadn’t been a complete idiot. Eventually, after she had persuaded herself she could show her face in public again (it took a long time) she crawled out of bed and hit the button on her answering machine. The electronic voice announced she had one message.

‘Hi, Sharon, I must have just missed you. It’s Daniel here from Club Diva,’ he paused and then, laughing, added, ‘in Hogan’s. Em, I was just looking through the list of names in the book and it seems somebody already entered Holly’s name a few months back. In fact it’s one of the first entries. Unless it’s another Holly Kennedy …’ he trailed off. ‘Anyway, call me back when you get a chance so we can sort it out. Thanks.’

Holly sat shocked on the edge of her bed, unable to move.

CHAPTER TWELVE

Sharon, Denise and Holly sat by the window in Bewley’s café overlooking Grafton Street. They often met up there to watch the world go by. Sharon always said it was the best window shopping she could ever do as she had a bird’s-eye view of all her favourite stores.

‘I can’t believe Gerry organised all this!’ gasped Denise when she heard the news.

‘It’ll be a bit of fun, won’t it?’ Sharon said excitedly.

‘Oh God.’ Holly had butterflies in her stomach just at the thought of it. ‘I still really, really, really don’t want to do it but I feel I have to finish off what Gerry started.’

‘That’s the spirit, Hol!’ cheered Denise. ‘And we’ll all be there to cheer you on!’

‘Now hold on a minute, Denise,’ Holly said, dampening the celebratory tone, ‘I just want you and Sharon there, no one else. I don’t want to make a big deal out of this at all. Let’s keep it between us.’

‘But, Holly!’ Sharon protested. ‘It is a big deal! No one ever thought you’d do karaoke again after last time …’

‘Sharon!’ warned Holly. ‘One must not speak of such things. One is still scarred from that experience.’

‘Well, I think one is a daft cow for not getting over it,’ mumbled Sharon.

‘So when’s the big night?’ Denise changed the subject, sensing bad vibes.

‘Next Tuesday,’ Holly groaned, bending forward and banging her head playfully on the table repeatedly. The surrounding tables of customers stared at her curiously.

‘She’s just out for the day,’ Sharon announced to the room, pointing at Holly.

‘Don’t worry, Holly; that gives you seven days exactly to transform yourself into Mariah Carey. No problem at all,’ Denise said, smiling at Sharon.

‘Oh, please, we would have a better chance teaching Lennox Lewis how to do ballet,’ said Sharon.

Holly looked up from banging her head, ‘Well, thanks for the encouragement, Sharon.’

‘Ooh, but imagine Lennox Lewis in a pair of tights, that tight little arse dancing around …’ Denise said dreamily.

Holly and Sharon stopped growling at each other to stare at their friend.

‘You’ve lost the plot, Denise.’

‘What?’ Denise said defensively, snapping out of her fantasy. ‘Just imagine those big muscular thighs …’

‘That would snap your neck in two if you went near him,’ Sharon finished for her.

‘Now there’s a thought,’ Denise said, widening her eyes.

‘I can see it all now,’ Holly joined in, staring off into space. ‘The deaths column would read: “Denise Hennessey, tragically died after being crushed to death by the most tremendous thunder thighs after briefly catching a glimpse of heaven …”’

‘I like that,’ she agreed. ‘Ooh, and what a way to die! Give me a slice of that heaven!’

‘OK, you,’ Sharon interrupted, pointing her finger at Denise, ‘keep your sordid little fantasies to yourself, please. And you,’ she pointed at Holly, ‘stop trying to change the subject.’

‘Oh, you’re just jealous, Sharon, because your husband couldn’t snap a matchstick between his skinny little thighs,’ teased Denise.

‘Excuse me, but John’s thighs are perfectly fine. I just wish mine could be more like his,’ Sharon finished.

‘Now you,’ Denise pointed at Sharon, ‘keep your sordid little fantasies to yourself.’

‘Girls, girls!’ Holly snapped her fingers in the air. ‘Let’s focus on me now, focus on me,’ she gracefully motioned with her hands, bringing them towards her chest.

‘OK, Ms Selfish, what are you planning on singing?’

‘I have no idea, that’s why I called this emergency meeting.’

‘No, it’s not, you told me you wanted to go shopping,’ Sharon said.

‘Oh, really?’ Denise looked at Sharon and raised an eyebrow. ‘I thought you were both coming to visit me on my lunch break.’

‘You are both correct,’ Holly asserted. ‘I am shopping for ideas and I need you both.’

‘OK, OK!’ Sharon exclaimed excitedly. ‘I think I’ve got an idea. What was that song we sang for the whole two weeks in Spain and we couldn’t get it out of our heads? It used to bug the hell out of us?’