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“You don’t owe me, Ben.” She caught up on numb feet. “The ghosts in that house are mine to face.”
Ghosts of Will doing his finest imitation of a loving husband. Faith—with whom she’d played dolls and dress-up, made Christmas and birthday presents for their parents, shared secrets and fights— Faith, taking her place.
Isabel fought an urge to wrap her arms around Ben and bury her face in his shoulder. She needed courage to face the home that had no doubt become her sister’s over the past three months.
CHAPTER THREE
ISABEL WOKE, groggy from lack of sleep. Tony’s crying pulled her to her feet, but then she heard Ben’s comforting voice, and Tony laughed. Isabel sank back, dragging a pillow over her face.
It all came back. Her sister and her husband had found the love Will had apparently never been able to feel for her. They’d had Tony together. They’d run away, only Tony surviving in the wreckage they’d left behind.
Tony. Her nephew. Her husband’s child. Leaving would be so easy.
Except she loved Tony with a mother’s heart. None of this was his fault, and Will had already ruined enough of her life. She might never learn to forgive Faith, but Will’s falseness wasn’t about to destroy her love for Tony.
She tossed the pillow toward the headboard and climbed out of bed. First, a shower that felt more like baptism into a crazy, borrowed existence. Then she put on jeans and a snug green sweater and began to unpack the bag she’d left in the middle of the floor last night. Thank goodness, she’d brought enough clothing to take her through selling her house.
She was hanging her things in the closet when Ben knocked on the door. “You awake?” he asked softly from outside.
“Come on in.” She looked for Tony, but Ben came alone.
He held out her cell phone. “Leah.”
Great. One free breath would have been nice before she had to face her former mother-in-law. “How’d you explain my staying here? She doesn’t know—”
He put his hand over the phone. “She knows you were separated. Why would you stay in that house? And why are you trying to protect Will?”
“He was still her son.”
Ben looked disgusted as he passed the cell.
Isabel replaced his hand with hers, blocking their voices again. “What did you say?”
“Hello, and that I’d find you.”
Maybe she was overreacting, but she wasn’t used to this angrier version of Ben. “I’m sorry. She— I know she can be awful, but she loved Will.”
“As long as he stayed in line.”
“She loved him as much as she can love anyone.” She brought the phone toward her ear.
“Wait.” Ben held out his hand. “Tony’s downstairs. He must have seen you last night because he keeps calling for you.”
“I’ll come down.” Armed with her last ounce of nerve.
“Thanks. He’ll feel better after he knows you’re here.”
She hoped Ben was right. They might be setting Tony up for another loss, because she had to find her own life soon. She couldn’t linger forever on the edges of Ben and Tony’s.
She spoke into the phone. “Leah?”
“I thought you’d hung up. What took so long?”
“Ben and I were talking about Tony. How do you feel now?”
“Exhausted. I know people are going to talk because I didn’t show up, but I can’t manage to get out of bed yet. Are you going to visit me, Isabel? I’d like to hear about my son’s service.”
Leah must be delirious. “You want me?” Despite her claims to be Isabel’s second mother, Leah had treated her as if Will had married the hired help.
“We’re all that’s left of my son now. We must help each other through our grief.”
“Huh?” The many dramas of Leah Barker annoyed the hell out of Isabel, but she bit her tongue. “Calm down, Leah. I’ll come up to Philadelphia in a few weeks, but I have to close the house first.”
“The house? Doesn’t it belong to Will?”
“You haven’t changed that much.”
“Pardon me?”
Isabel almost laughed at Leah’s stronger, affronted tone. “You’re protective,” she said, “of Will. I’ll let you know what the attorney says about the house.”
“And everything else.”
Just like that, her attitude wasn’t so funny. Isabel still owned the things she’d brought into her marriage. “You have nothing to worry about, Leah.”
“Why are you staying at your sister’s house?”
Just the question to turn the knife in Isabel’s wounds. “Ben asked me and I want to spend time with Tony.”
“Don’t you care what people will think? After all, you and Will were separated.”
“What are you implying, Leah?”
“I’m worried about my son’s reputation. You should be, too. I know you had problems, but he loved you.”
That bastard. He’d probably fed his mother the same story he’d given Ben—that Isabel had cheated on him. He’d never realized he didn’t have to hide his flaws from Leah. She refused to see them anyway. Eventually, he’d have persuaded her Faith was a victim he’d saved from a bad marriage, too.
“I loved Will, Leah. Let’s leave it at that. I need to get off the phone and go start on the house.”
“If I come stay with you, will you move back in?”
The threat didn’t scare Isabel. Leah hadn’t even come to her beloved child’s funeral. She’d hire an attorney before she’d travel all the way to Virginia to grab her share of Will’s belongings.
“Sure,” Isabel said. “Let me know when you’re coming.”
Her mother-in-law was silent for several seconds, no doubt planning her next offensive. Isabel smiled. “You’ll fill me in on what you’re doing?” Leah took another tack. “You should call me each evening.”
“I’ll have Ray Paine give you an update.”
“Ray? He’s Will’s attorney.”
“And mine, and I wish you wouldn’t crowd me, Leah.”
Again, she fell silent. “Let’s not argue, honey. We won’t pretend I didn’t think you were wrong for Will. Maybe I was right, maybe not, but you’re all I have left of my boy, and I don’t want to lose you. Maybe I’m trying to make sure you don’t cut all ties with me.”
“By accusing me of burglary?” Any non-succubus would know that was a mistake.
“I don’t want you to cut me out. I have the right to make demands.” The bubble of her arrogance deflated. “I hate situations I can’t control.”
A family trait. “I don’t like people who try to manage me. And being called a criminal puts me off, Leah. Why don’t you say what you mean instead of playing games?”
“Would you believe me if I told you how much I care about you?”
Care seemed like a strong word for what Leah appeared to feel, but she was trying to preserve their tenuous connection. Will must not have told Leah the “Isabel cheated” story after all. Leah would never forgive disloyalty to her son. “I might suspect you had an ulterior motive.”
“I do care. I’m protective of my son’s things, but you were part of his life. I wish I’d been nicer to you while you and Will were married.”
Leah had stopped making sense, but Isabel couldn’t turn her back on Will’s mother. Grief could make a woman talk crazy. “Don’t worry, okay? I won’t take anything that belongs to Will, and I won’t disappear without telling you.”
“You’re the only person I can talk to about…”
“Shh, Leah. Don’t upset yourself. Is anyone staying with you?”
“Janet’s here.” A friend who’d shown her the ropes of being a popular Philadelphia wife. Janet had never liked Isabel, either.
“Go do something with her awhile. Something that takes some energy.”
“You mean like shopping?”
Isabel laughed. She’d had silver polishing or cooking breakfast in mind. “Whatever keeps you busy. You don’t have to deal with everything today. Work your way into getting used to—” She couldn’t say Will’s death. “To what’s happened.”
“I think you’re right.”
It never took much work to persuade Leah to pamper herself. “I’ll call you later.”
“Thanks. And I’m grateful for the advice, too. We’ll talk soon. I still wouldn’t mind knowing what you plan to do about my son’s things.”
Leah couldn’t stop, and Isabel wasn’t a saint. For now a call was the best she could offer.
“POCK, DADDY, POCK!”
Which translated to Take me to the park across the street, Dad. Ben wiped cereal off the wall and picked more out of Tony’s hair. “Just a minute, Son. Let me chisel the kitchen clean first.”
At least he’d stopped begging for his “Iz-bell.”
Just as Ben wiped the last splat of cereal off the counter behind Tony’s high chair, Isabel came into the kitchen, like a woman taking possession of enemy territory.
“Morning,” she said, her cheerfulness obviously an act.
How had Leah put her in this mood?
“My Iz-bell.” Tony kicked so hard the whole chair rocked. Ben and Isabel reached for him at the same time.
“Let me.” Her eyes, soft with love, distracted Ben. His house felt starved for love.
Isabel eased his cooing son out of the high chair. Tony wrapped his legs around her as if he were either wrestling or claiming her for all eternity.
“I love you, baby.” She said it with wonder. That was the worst thing about cheating spouses. They made you forget what kind of person you were.
“You really thought you could stop loving him?” Ben’s throat tightened as Tony planted a wet, cereal-specked kiss on Isabel’s cheek. She looked at Ben, eyes wet.
The heavy air inside his house seemed to lighten.
“I’d better take him.” Ben reached for his boy. “You’re still going out?”
Nodding, Isabel stared at Tony as if she couldn’t get enough of him. Giggling, Tony burrowed his face into her hair. “He’s fine, despite what he must have seen in that accident.” She hugged him again until he wriggled. “You can have him in a sec, and then I have to call Ray before I go.”
“Why?” He didn’t want to hear anything more about this legacy idea. He wet a paper towel with warm water and tried to clean some of the detritus his son had rubbed on her cheek and neck.
The way she set her stubborn jaw equipped him with plenty of elbow grease. “I want to discuss setting up a trust fund for Tony, and while I was talking to Leah I realized I’d better find out for sure about my legal rights.”
“Don’t think you can run over me about Will’s money. No one provides for my son except me.”
“Be sensible. You can’t see the future. Who’d have believed three months ago that all this was waiting for us? When Tony grows up, he might need—and want— Will’s legacy.”
“Will always said you hated business matters.” He closed in again, trying to finish the cleanup.
“What Will actually meant was that he hated for me to ask questions about the business. He felt I was challenging his role as the great provider.” She dropped the sarcasm. “Another reason to feel idiotic for trusting him. I may be penniless.” She freed one hand and pushed his paper towel away. “What are you doing to my face?”
“Cereal.” He scrubbed off the last grains and then showed them to her. “Tony shared with you.”
“Is it in my hair, too?” But when she turned to let him search the brown strands, Tony grunted and tightened his legs.
“My Iz-bell, Daddy.”
“Aunt Iz-bell,” Ben said for maybe the billionth time.
“Uh-huh.” Tony nodded with vigor. “My Iz-bell.”
They had bigger problems. Someday Tony would grasp what aunt meant. “Okay, buddy. Let’s finish cleaning you both before your Iz-bell has to hose her self down.”
“No.” Tony resented even a paper towel coming between them. Ben had to laugh. Otherwise, his boy might tempt him to cry. “I told you he’s lost too many people lately.”
“Ben.” Without warning, Isabel put one arm around him.
She seemed too close. He couldn’t get enough air. What the hell had his voice betrayed? As his lungs screamed, he let her hold him, and he was almost as grateful as his son.
This was good, he told himself, even as he hated the devious path his thoughts took. She wouldn’t hug him if she didn’t feel attached. The more attached he made her feel, the safer he and Tony would be.
