Rapid Response

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‘Sounds like a good idea to me.’ She treated him to a brief smile then quickly made her way back to where she’d left the motorbike. She wasn’t going to fall into the trap again. The past was the past and she refused to keep harping on about it all the time. She had got over Ben—ages ago! The only way he could gain any power over her now was if she let him back into her life and that simply wasn’t going to happen. To put it bluntly, Ben Carlisle was history!

CHAPTER THREE (#ulink_13c13fb4-61ca-5fa1-84d3-4adc801fe5ec)

‘EVER had the feeling that someone must have spread the word that we were open for business today?’

‘It has been pretty hectic,’ Ben agreed ruefully as he followed Sean into the office.

It was the end of his shift and he’d been going off duty when Sean had asked to speak to him. The day had been one of the busiest Ben could remember. The coach crash had been followed by another RTA, this time in the town centre. Once again the resulting tailback of traffic had caused problems for the ambulance crews so he’d been asked to attend on the motorbike. Fortunately, nobody had sustained any really serious injuries that time but he’d only just got back to the hospital when another call had come in to go to a nursing home on the outskirts of Dalverston. One of the kitchen staff had been badly burnt when a fat fryer had caught fire and it had soon become apparent that the woman would need transferring to the specialist burns unit at Manchester.

He and Holly had travelled in the helicopter together because of the seriousness of the patient’s condition. They’d been far too busy stabilising the woman on the outward journey to make conversation and Holly had opted to sit next to the pilot on the way back. Nothing had been said but Ben suspected that she’d been keeping her distance from him and really couldn’t blame her. He’d had no right to use that tone when he’d spoken about Josh Hammond that morning.

The thought made him sigh and he saw Sean glance at him. ‘Problems?’

‘Just the usual ones, like the fact that I’m absolutely bushed and can’t face the thought of cooking myself a meal when I get in. Looks like it will be a take-away again tonight,’ he replied, making a note to be on his guard in future. He had to keep this problem with Holly under wraps so it wouldn’t cause any disruptions within the team. It was up to them to sort things out, although the thought of having to confront her wasn’t a pleasant one. He was more than happy to put it aside when Sean laughed.

‘Been there, done that and had the indigestion to prove it!’ Sean replied, sitting down behind the desk. ‘What you need is a good woman to take you in hand, my friend.’

‘Pass!’ Ben grimaced as he pulled up a chair. ‘I’d rather put up with the indigestion and save myself a whole load of problems, thank you very much.’

Sean shook his head. ‘You don’t know what you’re missing. Life has been fantastic since Claire and I got married. I don’t know how I ever managed without her and the kids, in fact.’

‘Then you’re one of the lucky ones,’ Ben said lightly.

‘Oh, I know that.’ Sean chuckled. ‘And I also know that sounds horribly smug but I’m not going to apologise for it. Anyway, enough of my eulogising about my good fortune. What I wanted to know was if there were any areas you felt I might be able help you with. And before you ask, no, I don’t have any concerns about your ability to do the job. You missed the extra training the rest of the team received and I just want to make sure that you’re happy with everything that’s happened so far.’

‘Everything has been fine today, although there might be times when I’ll need a helping hand,’ Ben said honestly. ‘I made up a lot of the time I’d lost while I was working with Heather Cooper at St Gertrude’s. She encouraged me to sit the Royal College of Physicians exams once I decided to specialise in accident and emergency medicine. I was actually thinking about applying to do a stint at HEMS when Heather told me about this new unit you’d set up here.’

‘I based a lot of it on the HEMS system,’ Sean explained. ‘London’s Helicopter Emergency Service is second to none and they gave me a lot good advice. Obviously, we’re working in a rural area rather than a city but the same principles apply. Time is of the essence if you want to save lives.’ He broke off and smiled. ‘Hi, what can I do for you?’

Ben felt his pulse jerk when he glanced round and saw Holly standing in the doorway. She’d changed out of her working clothes and the sight of her slender body clad in a simple denim skirt and a T-shirt sent a rush of heat through his veins. She’d pinned her thick chestnut hair into a knot on the top of her head but tiny wisps were already escaping and curling about her ears. She looked so young and lovely that he wanted to drink in her beauty and let it soak away the stresses of the day but he didn’t dare indulge in such pleasures unless he was willing to risk making a fool of himself.

He turned back to the desk, his heart pounding when Holly came and stood behind his chair. He could smell the faint aroma of antiseptic that clung to her skin—a scent they probably all carried on them—yet on Holly it smelled so seductive that his body immediately quickened. Ben stifled a groan, praying that Holly couldn’t tell what was happening. If she ever found out that the smell of antiseptic had caused him to have an erection, she’d think he was perverted!

‘Sorry to interrupt you, Sean, but I thought you’d like to know that the coach driver is out of Theatre. There’s a good chance he won’t lose his leg, too,’ she said, steadfastly ignoring Ben as she addressed Sean over the top of his head.

‘That’s wonderful! I know the prognosis wasn’t great when Max first saw him,’ Sean declared, referring to Max Jenkins, the head of the trauma surgery team. ‘But obviously things have worked out better than we feared. I don’t know if you’ve heard but Charity Adams had a baby girl. She’s been taken to the prem baby unit but they’re not expecting any major problems apparently, so that’s another success you two can notch up. Obviously, you make a great team.’

‘I’m sure the outcome would have been the same no matter who’d treated them,’ Holly said quietly, but Ben knew that what she was really trying to say was that she didn’t think their alliance had been anything special.

Was she worried in case Sean decided to team them up again in the future? he thought with a flash of bitterness. So far as Holly was concerned, he could take a long walk off a short pier and it was upsetting to realise how much she disliked him.

‘Maybe, but some people just seem to have a natural affinity and work well together. I’ll certainly bear it in mind,’ Sean stated, oblivious to the problems he might be creating.

Ben was hard-pressed to conceal his dismay. Being constantly paired up together would be a recipe for disaster if they didn’t manage to resolve their differences. When Holly turned to leave, he stood up because something needed to be done about the situation.

‘If that’s all, Sean, I’ll see if Holly can spare me a few minutes to go over a couple of things,’ he explained, ignoring the hostile look she shot his way as he followed her to the door.

‘Good idea, but don’t work too hard. Don’t forget that you’ve got to come back here tomorrow and do this all over again!’

‘We won’t.’ Ben’s jaw was aching from the effort of keeping his smile tacked into place. Holly was sending some very nasty vibes his way and he could tell that she was furious with him. He closed the office door then took her by the arm and propelled her along the corridor, looking for somewhere that would afford them some privacy. Resus was empty so he steered her in there and made sure the door was shut before he released her.

‘Who the hell do you think you are, manhandling me like that?’ she snarled like a small cat that had been backed into a corner.

‘I’m sorry but it was the only way to stop you saying something stupid,’ he shot back with a sad lack of tact.

‘Don’t you dare call me stupid.’

‘I’m sorry! OK?’ He took a deep breath and counted to ten when he realised he’d shouted back at her. Nobody had ever been able to rile him the way Holly could. She’d always possessed the ability to make him respond to her whether it was in anger or in passion.

His brain captured that last word and ran away with it. Ben’s heart raced as he suddenly recalled how it had been between them in the past, how easily their passion for each other had been roused. All he’d had to do had been to touch her—just the lightest, most delicate of touches, too—and sparks had ignited. They used to joke about it, in fact, one of those silly jokes that lovers shared about lighting the blue touch paper and standing back, and the memory brought a rush of tears to his eyes.

How he ached to relive the passion they had once shared, to run his hands over her skin and watch her body coming to life, feel her hands caressing him and making him feel whole again. Holly could make him feel as he’d used to feel, like someone who didn’t need to be afraid of what the future held. She could give him back his life and the thought filled him with despair because there was no way that he could let her do that for him. Even though his consultant had told him the prognosis was good, there was no guarantee that his cancer wouldn’t return. He could never get involved with Holly again because he wouldn’t take the risk of breaking her heart a second time.

‘Ben, what’s the matter? Ben!’

Holly could feel a lump of fear in the pit of her stomach. Ben didn’t say a word and the sight of him standing there with tears in his eyes was more than she could bear. She put her arms around him and hugged him because there was no other way she could think of that might help. Ben had always been so strong in the past and to see him looking so afraid now almost broke her heart.

‘It’s OK,’ she murmured, reaching up to stroke his hair. Ben had always worn his hair short but it was shorter than ever now, she realised in surprise, and the texture felt different, too, far less silky and a lot coarser than it had been.

Oddly unsettled by the discovery, she let her hands move down to his shoulders and was alarmed to discover how bony they felt. He was still wearing his flight-suit but not even the bulky clothing could disguise his thinness. She could feel his hip bones jutting into her, feel the hard sinews in his thighs pressing against her own, and sucked in a small breath because the intimacy of their position wasn’t lost on her. However, she was more concerned about the changes in his physique to worry about anything else right then.

She ran an exploratory hand down his back and frowned when she felt the ridges that marked each separate vertebra and rib. It was obvious that he’d had lost a great deal of weight in the past couple of years and she had no idea why. Had he been ill perhaps? She was just about to ask him when he suddenly stepped back and she was forced to release him.

‘I’m sorry…again!’ His voice was husky despite his attempts at levity and Holly’s heart was immediately touched all over again. Maybe she had spent the last two years toughening herself up but it just wasn’t possible to remain indifferent to him.

‘You don’t have to apologise, Ben.’

‘Thanks.’

He didn’t try to pretend that everything was fine and she was grateful for that. They had always tried to be honest with one another when they’d lived together, had made it a rule that they wouldn’t lie to save face or each other’s feelings. Even when Ben had told her he was leaving he hadn’t lied about his reasons, as so many men might have done. It was strange because she hadn’t realised before how much his honesty had meant to her.

‘Is it something you want to talk about?’ she asked, amazed that she could find anything positive about their parting when it had hurt so badly.

‘Not really.’

‘OK. But you are all right?’ she insisted, because she needed to be sure. Maybe she shouldn’t care how he felt but it simply wasn’t possible to remain completely detached.

‘I’m fine. Really. It’s been one heck of a day, hasn’t it?’

‘It has,’ she agreed, even though she doubted it was the pressure of work that had upset him. Ben was used to working long hours and dealing with the most traumatic incidents, too, but she’d never seen him so emotional before…

Apart from when he’d told her he was leaving her, of course.

Holly frowned as the memory surfaced with a rush. She rarely thought about that day because it was too painful, yet now she found herself wondering why Ben had appeared so distraught at the time. He’d taken the day off work because he’d had an appointment so she hadn’t seen him since breakfast. He had been waiting for her when she’d got home after work and she’d known immediately that something had been wrong when he’d led her into the sitting room and asked her to sit down.

He had told her simply that he’d met someone else and that he was leaving her. He hadn’t given her any details about the other woman, just said that he was sorry and that he’d never meant to hurt her. He’d been extremely tense and obviously worried when she hadn’t said anything but at the time Holly had been too shocked to speak. She had never expected that Ben would leave her and had just sat there while her world had collapsed.

‘So I’m really sorry, Holly, because I didn’t bring you in here to start an argument.’

She jumped when she realised he’d been speaking. She quickly backtracked over what had happened and blushed when it struck her how childishly she’d behaved. The problem was that Ben had always managed to arouse her, and not only her temper either.

‘And I’m sorry for the way I behaved just now,’ she said swiftly, closing her mind to the thought because she couldn’t deal with the memory of how wonderful their love-making had been. ‘It was silly of me to get so het up.’

‘So that makes it one apology apiece, discounting all my minor ones, of course. Do you want to go first and make it two, or shall I do the honours?’

Ben cocked his head on one side and regarded her quizzically. A tiny smile tugged at the corners of her mouth when she saw the laughter in his eyes.

‘Oh, you can go first. After all, you probably have a lot more to apologise for than I do.’

‘Oh, nice one! That slid very smoothly between the ribs.’

He grinned and Holly felt her pulse perform a determined little hiccup as she received the full benefit of the smile. It was hard to hide her dismay because she was no longer interested in Ben that way. She’d filed him under H for history just a few short hours ago and she wasn’t about to have second thoughts because her hormones were playing up. So maybe he was the most handsome man she had ever met, and she was prepared to admit that, but she wasn’t prepared to put her heart through the mincer a second time!

‘I owe you an apology for the way I spoke about Josh this morning. I had no right to comment on your relationship.’

‘Josh and I don’t have a relationship,’ she replied without thinking. The fact that she wasn’t one-hundred per cent certain that Ben couldn’t hurt her again had to be faced. It would be both foolish and dangerous to dismiss the idea, as she’d done before.

‘You don’t? But why not? Sorry! It’s none of my business, is it?’ Ben sighed. ‘That makes it three apologies to me and one to you.’

‘It doesn’t matter,’ Holly assured him, because she certainly didn’t want to make an issue out of it. Maybe it was silly but she felt uncomfortable about discussing her love life—or lack of one—with Ben. ‘Josh and I are good friends but that’s all. He’s a really nice person and we get on extremely well but we aren’t romantically involved.’

‘Not yet.’ Ben smiled but she could see a muscle in his jaw beating away, as though it was an effort for him to appear so upbeat at the prospect of her and Josh becoming an item in the future.

‘No, not yet.’ Her smile was a little too bright but she didn’t want to think about why Ben should dislike the idea. As he’d said, it wasn’t his business…

But? a small voice interjected. Because there’d been a definite but wriggling about on the end of that sentence.

Holly quickly dismissed the thought. There were no ‘buts’ in this situation. Getting hung up on the idea that Ben might care about her would be a mistake and she didn’t intend to fall into that trap again.

‘Sounds as though you have plans,’ Ben observed with a laugh.

‘Could be. Anyway, now that we’ve got the prickly bits over and done with, what did you want to say to me?’ She quickly returned the conversation to the relatively safe topic of why he had seen fit to hijack her in the first place. She frowned when he didn’t answer. ‘Come on, Ben. Out with it.’

‘I wanted to sort out a few things but I don’t really think it’s necessary now.’

‘A few things? Like what? Whether or not I’ve got over you? Is that what you mean?’

‘Mmm.’ He grimaced. ‘How big-headed can you get? I mean, why on earth would you still be pining for me, Holly? I bet you’ve had dozens of boyfriends in the last couple of years.’

‘I’ve been out with a few people,’ she replied coolly, because she had no intention of admitting that the ‘few’ added up to just two and that neither of them had been a proper relationship. Ben had been the first and the only man she’d ever slept with, although a team of mounties on horseback wouldn’t have dragged that confession from her.

‘Of course you have,’ he agreed, obviously unperturbed by the idea of legions of men lining up to take her out.

It just went to prove how wrong she’d been to imagine he cared about her seeing Josh, Holly thought darkly. If Ben could handle the thought of her dating dozens of different men then one more wouldn’t make a scrap of difference to him! The thought stung so much that it was an effort to appear calm when he continued.

‘It’s a weight off my mind, anyway.’

‘Pardon?’

‘The fact that you’ve moved on. I’ve been racking my brain to think of a way to…well, smooth things over between us, but obviously there’s no need to worry. What happened in the past is all over and done with, isn’t it, Holly?’

‘Not quite.’ His arrogance had almost left her speechless with shock. Almost, but not quite. She stood up straighter, not even trying to hide her contempt. Maybe he hadn’t enjoyed upsetting her two years ago but he’d still gone ahead and dumped her, reneged on all those promises he’d made, broken her heart, and nothing he said or did now could change all of that.