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She recoiled in horror and saw his expression darken but there was nothing she could do about it. An hour ago she’d claimed to be immune to him and it hadn’t been an idle claim either. She’d spent months shoring up her emotions and hardening her heart against the memories because it hadn’t been her fault that they’d split up but his. He had fallen in love with someone else so there’d been no point dwelling on the good times they’d had. She had torn up the photographs, thrown away all the silly little notes he’d been in the habit of leaving around the flat for her to find and had erased every trace of Ben Carlisle from her life.
She’d done a good job, too, because she hadn’t thought about him for—oh, at least two months. She had been confident that Ben was out of her system but if that was true, why had she responded to him just now? Why had she longed to touch him, lean against him, snuggle into his arms and play the loving little woman when it had got her absolutely nowhere first time around? Was she so pathetic that she needed to have the message hammered home to her again?
Ben never loved you. He just used you. You were a convenience to him, good in bed and more than willing to provide him with sex!
‘Damn it, Holly, don’t do that!’
Holly jumped. ‘Do what?’ she muttered, struggling to rid her mind of that taunting little voice.
‘Look at me as though I’m some kind of…of ogre!’ He glowered at her. ‘Working with you is going to be a nightmare if you insist on walking round with that massive chip on your shoulder. What happened between us is history and it’s about time you got over it!’
CHAPTER TWO (#ulink_77a9b454-2b63-5a1c-971f-7db3932295bf)
BEN couldn’t remember another time when he’d felt like such a louse. Apart from when he’d told Holly that lie, of course, and ‘louse’ wasn’t the word he would have used to describe himself then. He held his breath as he watched myriad expressions cross her face before she finally settled on anger. Good! He could put up with anything she cared to dish out so long as he didn’t have to see her looking so stricken.
‘Don’t flatter yourself, Ben Carlisle! I got over you a long time ago and there’s no chip on my shoulder, I assure you.’
‘Then let’s get on with what we’re here for.’
Ben crouched down and peered inside the coach. He could feel the waves of antipathy emanating from her but steadfastly ignored them. It was neither the time nor the place to deal with this issue because, despite what Holly had said, there definitely was an issue. Holly had been deeply hurt by the way he’d behaved two years ago and it was still having an effect on her. If he did nothing else then he would have to find a way to set her free so that she could move on.
The thought of exactly how Holly might choose to do that was unsettling. Even though Ben knew that he’d forfeited any rights where she was concerned, he hated the thought of her being involved with another man. Fortunately for him, the present situation was too grim to allow him to worry about it so he put it out of his mind while he focused on the problem of finding a way inside the coach. One of the windows further along from where they were kneeling had shattered during the crash so he pointed towards it.
‘I need to get inside so let’s try over there.’
Holly stood up then had to grab hold of his shoulder and steady herself when the coach started to rock. The vehicle had stopped before it had reached the bottom of the embankment and there was a very real danger that it could start moving again if they weren’t careful.
‘Take your time,’ Ben instructed. ‘If this thing rolls over then we’ll go with it. I don’t fancy being squashed flat under several tons of metal.’
‘I don’t suppose the passengers who are stuck inside fancy it either,’ she shot back, obviously still furious with him.
‘I’m sure they don’t,’ he replied mildly to defuse the situation. Holly had a fiery temper and he didn’t want to run the risk of her getting hurt because she wasn’t thinking clearly. ‘So let’s take it nice and steady for all our sakes.’
She shot him a smouldering look but, nevertheless, did as he’d suggested. Ben breathed a sigh of relief when she crouched down and began to inch her way forwards on her hands and knees. However, his relief was short-lived because from this angle he suddenly realised that he had a perfect view of her pert little bottom.
He ground his teeth as a surge of purely male appreciation swept through him. Holly is just a colleague doing a job, he reminded himself sternly as he followed her along the coach. He must focus on that instead of letting himself get carried away by how attractive that lurid shade of green could look in the right circumstances. Holly was wearing one of the regulation uniforms that had been issued to all the members of the rapid response team. It was similar in style to his own flight-suit and had knee pads and umpteen zippered pockets. Nobody would have classed the garment as sexy but, then, few people had been privy to the view he was currently enjoying. Holly’s taut little derrière did wonders for the baggy garment!
It was a huge comfort when they reached their destination at last and Ben could concentrate exclusively on the problem of getting inside the coach. He peered through the window then turned to Holly. ‘I should be able to get through there with a bit of luck. Can you pass me the bag once I’m down?’
‘OK.’
She didn’t waste time by asking questions, just moved aside to give him room to lower himself through the opening. It was a bit of a squeeze because his flight-suit was extremely bulky but he knew better than to take it off. The fabric it was made from had a twenty-second fire resistancy and that could be vital to his safety.
Holly lowered the Thomas pack down to him then swung her legs through the opening. Ben shook his head when he realised that she intended to climb down into the coach as well. ‘I can manage. It’s a real mess in here so you stay up there.’
She ignored him as she wriggled through the window and lowered herself into the coach. Ben glared at her. ‘Didn’t you hear what I said?’
‘Yes, I heard. And when Sean tells me that you’re in charge then I’ll do as you say. Until then I’ll make up my own mind about what needs doing, thank you very much.’
She squeezed past him and went to check on an elderly woman who was lying by the door. Ben swore under his breath but he knew she’d made a valid point. He had no right to issue orders or expect her to carry out his wishes. Two years ago he’d been her boss although he would never have dreamt of pulling rank. It had been such a pleasure to teach her and watch her growing increasingly confident. However, the time he’d had to take out of his career while he’d undergone treatment for his illness had set him back and he had to remember they were on an equal footing now.
It was another adjustment he would need to make in the coming weeks and it wasn’t going to be easy, but he had to forget about their past relationship and concentrate on the demands of this job. Gaining back some of the ground he’d lost was important to him and he wasn’t going to let anything stop him. He glanced at Holly and his mouth compressed. If Holly could handle this situation then, by heaven, so could he.
‘I can’t find a pulse.’ Holly frowned as she pressed her fingers against the artery in the driver’s right ankle. She waited a moment then shook her head. ‘No, still nothing.’
‘We’re going to have to get him out of there,’ Ben replied curtly. ‘He’ll lose that leg if we can’t restore the circulation pretty soon.’
‘See if you can get one of the fire crew to cut him out,’ she suggested, pushing the hair out of her eyes with a grubby forearm. Her hands, encased in a double layer of gloves, were covered in blood and there was more blood soaking through the knees of her uniform. The driver had been trapped in his seat by the steering column, which had buckled during the impact. He’d suffered a serious injury to his right thigh and had lost a lot of blood. They had rigged up a drip but as fast as they were pumping fluid into him, more blood was gushing out. Holly reapplied pressure to stem the flow but she knew the driver wouldn’t survive if he wasn’t freed soon.
‘I’ll see what I can do.’
Ben got up and scrambled over the tangle of metal that had once comprised the first few rows of seats. One of the firemen was using an oxyacetylene torch to free a young woman who was trapped in the third row and the noise was deafening. They had managed to get most of the injured out now so there was just the driver and the girl left. She looked up when Ben came back and her heart sank when he shook his head.
‘No go. They daren’t use any more cutting gear in here because of the risk of fire. Apparently, the fuel tank is full and the build-up of heat could ignite it.’
‘Great! We’ll just have to keep our fingers crossed that they get that girl out soon so they can start on the driver next.’
Holly looked round when she saw Nicky Brunswick making her way towards them. Nicky had been monitoring the young woman and Holly grimaced when she saw the worried expression on the paramedic’s face. ‘Don’t tell me—more problems?’
‘Looks like it.’ Nicky rolled her eyes. ‘It only turns out that she’s seven months pregnant and her waters have just broken.’
‘Oh, that’s just what we need!’ Holly exclaimed. ‘How long will it be before they manage to free her, d’you know?’
‘Another five minutes or so,’ Nicky began, then groaned when a scream rang around the coach. ‘Oh, please, don’t let that be the baby arriving already!’
‘You take over here while I go and see what’s happening,’ Holly instructed. ‘You’ll need to maintain pressure to control the bleeding.’
‘It doesn’t look as though he’s got that much blood left to lose,’ Nicky observed darkly. ‘It’s like an abattoir round here.’
‘And how would you know what an abattoir looks like?’ Holly demanded as they swopped places. She and Nicky had become good friends during the training sessions. They’d got on so well, in fact, that they’d decided to share a flat. Now she grinned at her friend. ‘I don’t know who you’ve been dating recently but a visit to the local abattoir certainly isn’t my idea of a fun night out.’
‘Depends on who you go with,’ Nicky replied archly.
‘The man hasn’t been born who could get me to a place like that,’ Holly retorted. ‘I expect a lot more than that from anyone who hopes to take me out on a date.’
‘So that’s your secret, is it? Treat ’em mean and keep ’em keen?’ Nicky laughed. ‘It certainly seems to work if Josh is anything to go by. The poor guy is totally besotted. I’ve heard nothing but Holly this and Holly that ever since you two met. It will be wedding bells soon if I’m not mistaken.’
‘Rubbish! Josh is just a friend,’ Holly replied tartly. It was complete nonsense, of course, although she couldn’t stop herself glancing at Ben to see how he’d reacted to the comment before it struck her what she was doing.
She turned away, praying that he hadn’t noticed. It was none of Ben’s business what she did! She was a free agent and could go out with a dozen different men if that was what she chose to do. She didn’t need his permission or his blessing. Ben had made his choice two years ago and he hadn’t chosen her.
It was sobering to realise the effect that decision had had on her life. As she made her way down the coach, Holly found herself thinking that Nicky was right in a way. Her attitude towards men had hardened in the past two years. When she’d been with Ben she’d been perfectly happy to fall in with his wishes and had tailored her life to fit in with his, but she didn’t make that mistake nowadays. This was her life and she intended to live it her way, and if that sounded selfish, she wasn’t going to apologise for it…
But was she really happy? a small voice whispered. Could she honestly claim that she didn’t feel as though she was missing out by adopting such a hard-nosed attitude? Didn’t she sometimes long to be in a relationship again where the other person’s needs were more important than her own?
Holly took a deep breath. She’d made up her mind how she intended to live her life and she was going to stick to it. She went straight to the young woman and crouched down beside her. The noise from the oxyacetylene cutter was tremendous and Holly could well appreciate why the poor soul looked so scared.
‘I’m Holly Daniels and I’m a doctor at Dalverston General Hospital,’ she shouted above the roaring. ‘Can you tell me your name?’
‘Charity Adams.’
‘So, Charity, Nicky tells me that your waters have broken. Is that right?’
‘Yes. I’m only seven months pregnant, too, so the baby shouldn’t be born for ages…’ Charity stopped talking and groaned. ‘Oh, that hurts!’
Holly grimaced. ‘It sounds as though you’re in labour but I’ll need to take a look at you before I can be sure.’
She stood up and quickly explained to the firemen that she needed to examine the girl. They turned off the torch and tactfully moved aside while she removed the protective blanket that had been placed over Charity and helped her out of her underwear. Her heart sank when she saw that the woman’s cervix was fully dilated because it meant the birth was imminent.
‘How long will it take to free her?’ Holly asked one of the firemen.
‘Just a couple more minutes.’
‘Then let’s get on with it. We need to get her out of here as fast as we can.’
Holly looked round when Ben came to join her. She drew him aside so that Charity couldn’t hear what she was saying. ‘The baby’s on its way. I’m hoping we have time to get her out of here before it arrives but it’s going to be a close call from the look of her. She’s fully dilated.’
‘I’ll tell the ambulance to stand by. I’m just going to organise a stretcher, ready for when they cut the driver free. We don’t want any more hold-ups.’
‘Good idea,’ Holly agreed. She frowned as he moved away because she couldn’t help noticing how grim he looked. Obviously, the situation with the driver in particular was extremely worrying but she had a feeling it wasn’t that which was bothering Ben most of all. Had it been that reference to her and Josh perhaps?
Charity gave another loud groan and Holly put that foolish thought out of her head. Ben had had his chance so why should he care if there was a legion of men interested in her?
The girl was in a great deal of pain but it was far too risky to administer pain relief at this stage when the baby was so premature. The normal analgesics used during childbirth could cause respiratory problems in pre-term babies. Whilst it might be acceptable to use them in the safety of a well-equipped maternity unit, they didn’t have that luxury here. She would have to rely on talking Charity through the birth.
‘Try to work with the pain and don’t fight it,’ she advised, taking hold of the girl’s hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze. ‘I want you to try and breathe nice and slowly—big deep breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth…That’s it. You’re doing great.’
Holly looked up when the fireman tapped her on the shoulder and told her they were ready to remove the seat. Ben came back just then and between them they managed to help Charity out of the gap. They had to stop when another contraction began but as soon as it was over, they set about getting her out of the coach. A ladder had been set up through one of the windows but Charity stopped dead and refused to carry on when she realised that she was going to have to climb up it.
‘I can’t get up there!’ she wailed. ‘What if the baby comes?’
‘Holly will be right behind you.’ Ben put a comforting arm around her shoulders. ‘She won’t let you fall and she certainly won’t let anything happen to your baby.’
‘But it’s almost here. I can tell!’ The girl clung grimly to the metal rungs, shaking her head when Ben tried once more to urge her up the ladder. ‘No! I can’t do it and you can’t make me!’
‘Maybe we can deliver the baby here,’ Holly began, but Ben didn’t let her finish.
‘That isn’t an option.’
He took hold of Charity’s hands, ignoring Holly as he set about persuading the girl to do what he wanted. Holly didn’t say anything but she was seething with anger at his high-handed attitude. Ben seemed to think that he could boss her around but he was mistaken if he thought she was going to meekly do his bidding. As she’d told him once already that day, he was no longer her boss.
A frown puckered her brow as that thought sank in. Ben had been two years ahead of her when they’d met—he’d already been a registrar when she’d been a lowly houseman. He had been extremely good at his job and had had a promising future ahead of him, too. That being the case, what was he doing at Dalverston? He should have been a consultant by now, not a specialist registrar, and been on his way towards a post as head of department. So what had gone wrong? Why had his career apparently come to a standstill in the last two years? And why did she have a feeling that the answers to those questions were important?
‘Are you ready, Holly? We need to get a move on.’
Holly blinked when Ben spoke to her. He’d somehow managed to convince Charity that she must climb the ladder because the girl had her foot on the first rung. Even though Holly was desperate to find out more about his career, it really wasn’t the right time to ask questions. She went to join them, shaking her head when Charity had another change of heart and stepped down.
‘You can do this, Charity. There’s just a dozen rungs to climb then you and your baby will be safe.’
Charity took a shuddering breath and placed her foot back on the rung. ‘I can do this,’ she muttered. ‘I can climb up this ladder.’
‘Be careful, won’t you?’
Ben touched her on the arm and Holly felt her heart leap when she saw the concern in his eyes. How many times had she seen him looking at her that very same way? she thought wonderingly.
‘Josh is up top and I’m sure he’s only too eager to give you a helping hand but don’t rush. We don’t need any more problems to contend with at the moment.’
The acerbic note in his voice when he mentioned the paramedic might have gone unnoticed by most people but not by her. No way. Holly bristled with resentment. ‘And what’s that supposed to mean? Do you have a problem with me and Josh?’
‘Not at all.’ His smile made a mockery of what she’d been thinking earlier. She didn’t need to hear the indifference in his voice to know that she’d been mad to imagine Ben still cared about her. He never really had cared, if the truth be told, and the proof of that was the way he had dumped her so callously. It was an effort to hide her hurt when he continued.
‘As you pointed out, Holly, it’s not my place to comment on what you do.’
‘No, it isn’t. I’m glad you realise that.’
She didn’t say anything else because there wasn’t time. Charity had moved up another rung and Holly quickly followed. They had to stop when another contraction began but it wasn’t long before they were able to carry on. However, it was a relief when they reached the top of the ladder where there were people waiting to help the young mother the rest of the way.
Josh grabbed hold of Holly’s arm when she scrambled out onto the side of the coach and stood there, blinking. It seemed so bright outside after the gloom inside the coach that she couldn’t focus for a moment.
‘Are you OK, Holly?’
The concern in the handsome young paramedic’s voice was wonderfully soothing after her recent spat with Ben and she smiled warmly. ‘I’m fine now, thank you very much.’
‘Good!’ Josh gave her a quick hug then went to supervise as Charity was helped down to the ground. A plastic chute had been set up against the coach and Charity was able to slide down it without too much difficulty.
Holly sighed as she watched Josh helping the girl to a waiting ambulance. Had her response had been a bit too warm just now? She didn’t want to give Josh the wrong idea, especially not when it might upset Ben…
‘Damn, damn, damn!’
The curses sprang from her lips when she realised what she was doing again. Even after everything that had happened, she was still considering Ben’s feelings! She swung round when she heard someone laugh and saw Nicky climbing out of the coach.
‘Tut, tut, is that really the kind of language a well brought-up young lady should use?’ Nicky grinned at her. ‘If I didn’t know better, I’d say you had man trouble, Holly Daniels.’
‘Not a chance,’ Holly retorted. ‘I’ve too much sense to let any man cause me grief.’
Nicky whistled in admiration. ‘I wish I had your attitude. I keep telling myself that I need to toughen up but I’m such a marshmallow when it comes to affairs of the heart. I envy you, Hol, really I do, although I hope poor Josh realises what he’s letting himself in for.’
‘I wouldn’t dream of deliberately hurting Josh, or anyone else for that matter,’ Holly denied in dismay.
‘Oh, I know that! And I didn’t mean to imply that you would. It’s just that you have your life all worked out and refuse to be messed about.’ Nicky smiled placatingly. ‘I’m hoping to learn a lot from you while we’re flat-sharing. If I can get my act together like you’ve done, Holly, then I’ll be a happy bunny!’
Holly sighed as Nicky disappeared down the chute. Nicky seemed to think that her life was perfect but it was a long way away from being that. She may have achieved a certain stability recently but that could change now Ben was back on the scene. She might claim to be over him but if that was true, why did she feel so on edge? Was it possible that she still felt something for him?
She glanced round as another paramedic appeared with a stretcher that would be used to move the driver, suddenly glad that she didn’t have the time to answer that question right then. She quickly made her way back inside the coach and discovered that the fire crew had finally freed the driver. Between them they managed to shift him onto the stretcher. However, getting him out of the coach proved to be a major task. The stretcher had to be hauled out through the window with the aid of ropes and it was a worrying time for everyone concerned.
Ben heaved a sigh of relief as they watched the ambulance roar away with its sirens wailing. He looked almost as exhausted as she felt but there was a gleam in his eyes that she’d seen many times before, a light that sprang from satisfaction at a job well done. Her heart knocked against her ribs because she didn’t want to think about the past right then.
‘That seems to be it, then. Everyone accounted for so it’s back to base now, I think.’
