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“Which is kind of ridiculous. I’d all but gotten used to it happening to boys. Why should a girl be any different? Maybe I’m the sexist one here.”
“She’ll be fine.”
“You didn’t hesitate. Not even a second.”
“Does that bother you?”
“A little,” I admitted, but held his gaze. “Are there a lot of female angels?”
“Is that what she is? I didn’t see the imprint.”
I nodded. Since angels and demons didn’t have actual wings here in the human world—apparently such things were not physical as much as they were metaphysical—they did retain the mark of such wings. It looked like a large tattoo that stretched across their backs and down their sides. Angel wings were pale with delicate, feathery lines. Demon wings were bold and black and webbed. It was the only way to tell them apart at a glance.
“There are an equal number of male and female angels,” he said.
“Equal. Everything’s equal,” I grumbled. “Got to keep the balance on the universal teeter-totter, don’t you?”
He studied my face. “I know you’re upset.”
I didn’t break our eye contact. “Did you really tell Roth he could kill me if I screw up?”
He didn’t speak for a moment. “No.”
The demon had said it with such certainty, there had to be more to this. I needed to know the truth. “Then what did you say that gave him that idea?”
His gaze grew fiercer. “You can’t let what happened earlier with that boy ever happen again. It’s too dangerous, Samantha.”
It was so cold tonight—or maybe it wasn’t. Maybe it was just me and my soulless side effects. My coat wasn’t thick enough to keep me warm. The tights I wore under my skirt were too thin. I shivered. “That’s the real reason you’ve stayed away from me this week. So I wouldn’t be tempted to kiss you again. So I wouldn’t hurt you again.”
His vivid blue eyes burned into mine. “You didn’t hurt me the first time.”
“But I could next time.”
“We don’t know that for sure.” He wrenched his gaze away from me, his expression shadowing. “I kept my distance because I needed to know if this pull I feel toward you was because of what you are. If this soul inside me has been a magnet drawing me closer to you since the first moment we met.”
It was what I’d also feared. That this—this overpowering thing I felt for Bishop wasn’t real. That it was just another side effect, like me being cold and hungry all the time. All because he had a soul and I longed for it. “And?”
His brows drew together. “Inconclusive. I’ll know for sure when we get your soul back.”
My heart pounded like a wild thing in my chest. “You think it’ll be that simple? Find Stephen, find my soul, pop it back in like a battery pack? Snap, Samantha’s back to normal and you won’t feel so weird around me?”
“Nothing important is ever that simple.” He searched my face. “Let me do my job. Let me find him. And then we’ll figure everything else out.”
I pushed a hand through my hair, tugging on a tangle, and realized I was literally trembling. “Quite honestly? Roth is right. Even if you purge the city of every single other gray, I’m still here. That means the barrier stays right where it is and you’re stuck here.”
“It’s fine.” Bishop rubbed his fingers over his temples, his frown deepening. “All is fine. All will be fine. I swear it will. Nothing to worry about. Nothing, nothing at all.”
There was a worrisome edge of madness to his voice, something I remembered all too well from before. “Are you okay?”
“Why wouldn’t I be? Everything’s fantastic.” When he laughed, it had a sharp, insane edge to it.
He wasn’t okay. Far from it. “You said you’d found alternate ways of dealing with the crazy when it landed. How exactly is that? Deep breathing? Meditation?”
“Something like that.”
“Care to expand?”
“Not really.”
His insistence on always being evasive made me crazy. “Nothing’s really changed, has it? You don’t tell me anything.”
“I tell you what you need to know. But some things...you don’t want to know.”
I flinched. “I thought we were in this together. Like a team. The others don’t know the secret about me....”
“And you are never to tell them.” He grabbed my shoulders tightly as if what I’d said had alarmed him. The craziness in his eyes intensified. “You hear me? None of them can ever know about your birth parents.”
“I hear you. Relax.” I reached down and grabbed his hand. Electricity sparked between us and the insanity began to ease from his expression.
Skin to skin. Touching him only spiked my hunger, but it was essential—at least right now—for him to calm down.
The others knew I could do this, just like I could see the searchlights. But they didn’t know the whole truth like Bishop did.
“Better?” I asked.
“Much.” He nodded, entwining our fingers together for a moment that was equal parts blissful and torturous before he reluctantly let go. “I know you’re frustrated by some of the things I do, but you have to trust me.”
“I want to...”
“But?”
My throat tightened as I locked gazes with him. “How can I trust somebody who won’t even tell me his real name?”
“My name is Bishop.”
“It wasn’t always.”
“No. Not always.” He looked into my eyes and for the briefest moment I was certain he was going to tell me. Then something shuttered there, keeping me out when I only wanted in.
Don’t get me wrong, I liked his name. I loved his name, really. It was right and it suited him. But it wasn’t real. It was something made up, like an actor in Hollywood who wanted to leave his humble beginnings far behind.
If anything, I felt uneasier than I had before our private talk. I followed him wordlessly back to the dark alley to find Roth hovering over the angel while still holding the knife. The way he watched her was predatory.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” I demanded.
“She’s so hot. Too bad she’s an angel.” He gave me a cold grin. “I checked under her sweater.”
A sudden flash of fury turned my vision red. “Touch her again and I’ll kill you myself.”
“Chill out, gray-girl.” Kraven stood nearby with his arms crossed over his chest. “I was chaperoning from a disinterested distance. Don’t worry, he didn’t get frisky. It was just her back.”
“She smells so good.” Roth crouched down lower so he could put his face close to hers. “Like strawberries and whipped cream. It’s making me hungry.”
“Get away from her,” Bishop warned.
“Make me.”
All I wanted to do was protect this defenseless girl. I was about to move toward Roth and kick him as hard as I could, hoping to do a little damage with my high heels, when she let out a gasp and her eyes snapped open.
“Back from the dead.” Roth gazed down at her lasciviously. “Welcome, beautiful.”
She stared up at him hovering over her with the knife in his grip. Then her hand shot out and grabbed his throat.
“Get off me.” She pushed him upward and then slammed him down to the ground. She easily disarmed him and held the knife to his throat.
He looked up at her straddling his chest, his eyes wide with surprise.
“That I didn’t expect,” Kraven said, from where he leaned against the wall. “But I kind of like it.”
“Easy.” Bishop approached the furious angel. “It’s okay.”
“How is this okay?” she demanded. “He was sniffing me like a horny dog. Very unprofessional. He must be one of the demons.”
“I’m definitely enjoying this,” Roth said with a lewd grin. “You can sit on me anytime, beautiful. Clothing optional.”
“You’re disgusting.” She jabbed the knife into his throat deep enough to cut him. He winced and blood trickled down his neck. The mocking edge to his expression disappeared. “I despise demons.”
In a single effortless movement, she got to her feet and inspected the golden dagger. Her gaze flicked to Bishop. “Who’s the leader here?”
“I am,” Bishop said.
“Depends on the day, really,” Kraven muttered.
The blonde’s gaze shot to him. “You’re another demon, aren’t you?”
“Is it my cologne or my good looks that gave me away?”
I was becoming more impressed by the second. I’d expected her to be scared and uncertain, like she’d been before. But this angel could kick some serious ass.
“I’m Cassandra,” she said when her attention fell on me. “You said your name’s Samantha, right?”
“That’s right. Samantha Day.”
She cocked her head. “I thought you were human, but...” She looked at Bishop. “I sense that she’s soulless—a gray. I don’t understand.”
“Samantha’s different from the others. I’ll explain everything later.” Bishop’s eyes flicked warily to the knife the blond angel clutched. “I’m Bishop. That’s Kraven. And the demon on the ground in need of a Band-Aid is Roth. Welcome to Trinity, Cassandra.”
“Glad to be here.” She rubbed her previously injured chest and gave him a bright smile. “Stupid ritual.”
“I couldn’t agree more.” He grinned back at her.
I’d been more than prepared to like Cassandra, but a dark ribbon of jealousy suddenly appeared out of nowhere to twist through me.
“Take me to your headquarters and we’ll debrief,” she said.
“Sure thing.” Bishop glanced at me. “Samantha, go home.”
The gorgeous, blond angel gets a killer smile and I get the brush-off. Awesome.
“No,” Cassandra said. “She’s coming with us.”
“Is that necessary?” Bishop asked.
“I have a few questions for her.”
He flicked a glance at me before returning his attention fully to Cassandra and he gave her another knee-weakening grin before offering her his arm. “Of course. Anything you like.”
She took his arm and he began to lead her away, ignoring the rest of us.
I glanced at Kraven as that sharp-taloned jealousy I was trying to ignore began to leave claw marks on the inside of my chest.
He smirked at me. “Love hurts, sweetness.”
Chapter 4
I only had myself to blame. Bishop said I should go. Instead, I insisted on sticking around to help the helpless girl who wasn’t helpless at all.
Now I felt like a specimen under the microscope as Cassandra had been watching every move I made since we got back to St. Andrew’s, which was the abandoned church in an abandoned neighborhood the team had chosen as their makeshift “headquarters” and temporary hotel. Along with yours truly, the blonde angel swept her appraising gaze over the tall ceiling, stained-glass windows and rows of pews in the main sanctuary. Since there was no electricity, hundreds of candles were lit throughout, giving the area an eerie glow.
My feet hurt from these heels—which were meant for nightclubs, not brisk walks through the city streets. Still, the pain gave me a focal point. I concentrated on my aching feet rather than the threads of panic stitching unpleasant patterns through my gut. Even though I’d been given an uneasy pass when it came to the team, I still had a lot in common with a mouse in the middle of a group of feral cats. It didn’t matter if they had halos or horns.
While Cassandra studied me, I studied Bishop. Hard not to. My gaze was always drawn to him when he was in the same room as me. I couldn’t ignore him if I tried.
I refused to believe it was just because I was attracted to his soul, even if that was his hypothesis for my unearthly infatuation with him.
I didn’t feel like this toward Colin. Or anybody else with a soul.
Bishop was different for me. Different from anyone.
And when his gaze followed Cassandra through the sanctuary as if he couldn’t look away from her, the gnawing ache inside me suddenly had nothing at all to do with hunger.
The other demons had taken seats in the pews on opposite sides of the church. Kraven sat three rows from the front.
“Why’d they send another angel?” he asked sullenly, cutting through the silence that had fallen since we’d arrived here. “I thought we were supposed to be all nice and balanced. Now it’s four against two.”
“An exception was made,” Cassandra replied crisply. “Demons are rarely trustworthy enough to be part of a rare mission like this without causing trouble. Present company excluded, of course.”
“Don’t try to butter me up now, Blondie. You already said you despise demons.” His lips curled to the side. “It’s almost like you’re trying to hurt my tender feelings.”
